This letter was written on the occasion of the 13th birthday of the author’s firstborn, Beatrice. Much gratitude goes to him and to Beatrice, for allowing Smart Parenting Online to publish this personal message.

It is said that we are made immortals through our children. As we nurture them to be fine individuals and grow into responsible citizens, a part of us lives on and is perpetuated through eternity.

16 January 2010

My ever dearest Beatrice,

Today marks a milestone in your life ---- you are now officially a teenager! It's both exciting and exhilarating, but just as equally horrifying. One word can best describe it ---- AMBIVALENT (look it up :) ). You're caught up between being treated like a child one moment, and being expected to act in a more mature manner on the next; caught up between “you can't do that” and “you should be doing this already”; between being told “you're not a child anymore!” and “you're still a child!”. I know, it's confusing.....but I understand. And hopefully, you'll have the wisdom to understand it soon enough, as well.

It's been thirteen years since Mama and I first learned that you were coming. We were newly minted doctors, ready to face the world. I must admit that the timing was a bit unexpected, but we knew that it was inevitable and is certainly most welcome. I have loved your Mama ten summers before that and we knew that your coming birth was a culmination of that love between us that we nurtured with care.

At that point in our life, we were at a cross roads. We were not quite sure yet whether we'll start working as General Doctors or go into further training. Whether we'll live in Manila with Lolo Fred and Lola Ely, or in Cavite with DaddyLo and MommyLa; or in fact, whether we'll live with anyone of them at all! But one thing was sure.... we will all be together as a family. The first few years were shaky but we managed. We lived separate from your grandparents in a house generously provided by your Lolo and we went into further training. And this is the first instance that Mama and I would like to apologize to you. I feel we cheated you of some of the precious time that we should have spent with you; a result of our being away most of the time during our training. I feel that we did not hug you enough, did not kiss you enough, or play with you enough, especially during your first 2 years of life. Of course you were well-loved by everyone as you were the first “apo” from both sides of the family, but I regret that we were not around as much as we wanted. For that we apologize! Then Yana came, then Gabby, then before we knew it, you've grown to be a fine lady that you are right now: intelligent, independent, creative, admired by her peers, and talented.

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