When you huddle with other moms in your child’s school, one of the topics that will definitely come up is hiring a tutor. Sure, every mom wants the best for her children —- including wanting them to get good grades so they can get into the best universities and eventually land a good job that they hopefully love. But is hiring a tutor really the key to achieving this end-goal?
Vicky Roquez, mom of three, shares that she has no plans of hiring a tutor for her children. “I don’t think it’s necessary, especially if they’re not bringing home failing grades. I’d rather they learn how to study on their own.” Raising independent kids is crucial to their life satisfaction when they grow up. “Sometimes we need to let our kids do their thing; the way they learn may be different from my learning style,” she adds.
Of course, not hiring a tutor doesn’t mean that you’re totally letting go. Sue Espiritu, account executive and mom of two, makes sure she’s still available to answer any question her kids might have. “Your role as a mom to a grade-schooler is not really to teach them their lessons, because they should be learning them in school. Your new role is to guide them into getting into their own rhythm of doing their assignments and studying their lessons on their own. It’s a life skill they’ll need when they’re grownups.”
The key, of course, is to keep in mind that you have to allow your child to learn his lessons by himself, and merely act as a guide whenever he needs you. If you can commit to that (and not fall into the trap of micro-managing your child), here are a few upsides to not hiring a tutor:
1. You can save enough for a yearly family vacation. You don’t just hire any tutor; you’d want to hire the best one for your child. But it comes with a price. Having said that, you might realize that a school-year's worth of payment to a tutor can amount to a family trip to Hong Kong Disneyland, or a trip to Legoland Malaysia? A tutor's hourly rate goes for as low as P250 to as high as P550. If the tutor goes to your house for an hour every day… well, you do the math.
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2. You can have more bonding opportunities with your child. When your child asks questions about a lesson he’s confused with, treat it as both a learning opportunity and a bonding activity with your child. You’ll learn more about him -- his learning style, his strengths and weaknesses -- and you can bond over discussions and explanations of how photosynthesis works. Remember: kids learn through play, so try to make it fun.
3. You can teach your child time management skills. Twenty-four hours in a day isn’t enough for everything we want to do -- the same goes for kids. After a long day at school, kids would want to just relax and play. But homework won't get done on its own. Without a tutor dictating his schedule, he’ll need to learn how to prioritize his tasks. Which homework or projects are due tomorrow? What subject does he need to devote more study time to? This skill isn't learned overnight. With your help, eventually, he’ll get his groove. He’ll learn how to be resourceful and how not to crack under pressure. He’ll learn not just to work hard, but to work smart as well.
4. You can instill in your child independence and responsibility. Did you have a tutor when you were in grade school? We're guessing not. Kids today have it easy, and it’s not always a good thing. By taking charge of his own school work, your child can learn and practice life skills that are crucial when he goes out into the real world. It's really preparing him for life, when you think about it. We want our kids to be happy and productive adults in the future, yes? Not hiring a tutor for him is one of the things you can do to achieve that end-goal.