One tough part of parenthood is learning when to activate a parent's disciplinarian mode. Children can become quite mischievous, especially at a young age when they aren't fully aware yet of the consequences of their actions. But there's really no foolproof method when and how to be a disciplinarian. It is often a trial-and-error journey, as celebrity moms Cheska Garcia-Kramer, Rica Peralejo Bonifacio and Jodi Sta. Maria can attest.
Here are three things that worked for them. 1. Always explain why. The three moms believe that a good spank does more good than harm. But before Cheska and husband Doug Kramer do it, they listen to their kids Kendra, Scarlett, and Gavin's side of the story.
Mommy Kramer told PEP.ph (Philippine Entertainment Portal) at the Whole Mom Familyscape event, "First, we talk to them and ask them, 'What happened?', 'How come you did that?' So we let them explain. We ask them, 'Is it right or wrong?' And then after that, we tell them that we have to discipline you." She underlined that spanking their kids doesn't mean to hurt them, but to remind them of what they had done.
Rica's 2-year-old son has been obedient so far, but when the time comes he would need to be disciplined, she would first make sure he's ready for it. She explained, "It’s not as if pinalo mo lang kasi hindi nag-o-obey. You explain what has happened, you take the time to mend the heart of the person, you don’t just palo."
2. Reconcile right away. For Rica, it's important not to leave your child guilt-ridden. She said it was best to shower them with affirmation afterwards to let them know that you still love them.
Cheska added, "We hug them and we embrace them, and even after doing that, they’re the first ones to say 'I’m sorry, Mama and Papa, I love you.'"
3. Communicate and connect. Being close to your children helps, said Cheska. She remarked, "It’s very difficult to discipline your children if you don’t have a relationship with them, because they’re not used to talking to you, speaking to you, opening up to you.
'When you have a relationship with your children, and they know you, and they know the kind of love that you have, then it is easy. They’re more accepting and nagtatanda talaga sila kahit na hindi sila laging pinapalo."
Jodi agreed. In her guest appearance in Magandang Buhay, Jodi encouraged fellow parents to have an open communication with their kids. The Kapamilya actress said, "Feeling ko, nagkakaproblema talaga kahit anong relationship kapag nawawalan ng communication. We don’t only communicate with our children, but we connect with them as well."