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  • Household Hullaballoo: How to Deal with a Yaya Vs. Maid Showdown

    Here are some stories from parents on yaya vs. maid conflict and how they dealt with it. Read on for expert advice for some common yaya and maid sticky situations.
    by Lili Narvaez .
  • Read on to learn more about how to establish yourself as the employer to your helper and how to handle a tattle-tale yaya.


    A scenario like this can make you think twice about how you manage your staff. Cecile Narvaez Hufana, mom to Bea, Rufino and Bubba, shares a story about a bossy maid: “She would act as if she was the boss of the rest of my staff. Naturally, they felt some resentment towards her, especially because they pretty much had the same jobs, anyway. At first, I let them sort it out by themselves and even reprimanded the bossy maid, reminding her that my instructions were to be followed and not hers. But when I sensed that she wouldn’t change her ways—which affected the rest of my staff— I decided to let her go. For me, thinking about the sake of the majority of the staff was better.”

    It is your discretion whether or not it is time to let an employee go. Keep in mind that one person can affect everyone else. If your staff is troubled by a bossy member, then do the right thing and give importance to those who remain reliable and competent workers.

    Tattle-tale yaya
    You hate to admit it, but sometimes you can’t always be on top of things in your household, which is why you’re grateful for the information your help shares with you at the end of the day. But there’s a fine line between reporting the day’s events and giving the lowdown on the activities of every member of the household staff. What to do when yaya is a sumbungera and starts saying unpleasant things about the rest of the help? Here’s what Irene del Castillo Kainama, mom to Adie, 1, says, “It’s good to know what happens at home. Pero it can lead to conflict among the house help, which you’ll eventually have to fix. In the end, it’s all a disadvantage—if they get jealous of each other, everything they do might come off as negative.” Cantada agrees, “It’s not good for the staff. Listen to what she has to say about the other maid or yaya, but don’t feed on it. Verify first and observe. Then if what she says is right, then you can tell the other maid, ‘Napapansin ko na hindi mo na ginagawa ang trabaho mo,’ but dont reveal your source.”
    Lamzon adds, “I’ve learned to take things with a grain of salt. I don’t believe everything I hear;
    I do my own investigation. Also, I don’t encourage it, and I make the sumbungera know it doesn’t work with me. They know I want them to do their jobs and to do it well.”

    Sticky fingers
    Like it or not, temptation in the household will arise, especially when it comes to one’s personal belongings. Instances of borrowing without permission and stealing may occur between two members of your staff. One thing you must remember is that “Prevention is key,” says Lamzon. “I bought them cabinets with keys so they have their own safe place for things that are valuable to them. I give them their own personal supplies, too, so they don’t need to share and blame each other for consuming them.”
    Remember that even if they live and work for you, your household members own cherished items, too, which they acquired through their hard work. Because of this, Kainama reminds all moms to “pay all of them on time kasi money is really a big issue for most of them.” She adds, “If money does become an issue, you have to allow them to settle that on their own. If my maid steals money from my yaya and it was proven, then it is important that she must be paid back first before any action is taken on my part.”
    “Emphasize honesty and that you don’t like stealing. Put this as part of your expectations,” says Cantada. “The one na nakawan should report it to the employer. And the employer will be the one to give the warning. If it happens again, then let go.”



    Click here to learn how to deal with conflict on responsibilities and chores.

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