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  • Household Hullaballoo: How to Deal with a Yaya Vs. Maid Showdown

    Here are some stories from parents on yaya vs. maid conflict and how they dealt with it. Read on for expert advice for some common yaya and maid sticky situations.
    by Lili Narvaez .
  • arm wrestlingHaving household help sure takes a big load off your shoulders. A few extra pairs of hands when it comes to keeping house and caring for your little ones are much appreciated—your maid and yaya truly are heaven sent.  

    But what happens when your helpers become the source of conflict in the household? What if your helpers are the ones involved in their own fight? Whether it’s about who gets the day off or who picks up in the living room or even about their personal problems, you must keep everything under control before it affects the rest of the family.

    The day-off dilemma
    Before you decide to hire help, you must sit with her and give her a thorough explanation about her employment in your household.

    Vicky Cantada, senior counselor of Center for Family Ministries (CeFAM) at the Ateneo de Manila University in Quezon City says, “The employer should be the one declaring the day off to avoid conflict. Like once or twice a month, Saturday or Sunday, alternate or not.” However, scenarios of your maid and your yaya needing the same day off are unavoidable circumstances. “Take consideration. Ask one if it’s okay if the other takes the off. If hindi okay, then it’s an indication that the other is difficult and they should settle it themselves,” Cantada adds.

    Liza Claudal Lamzon, mom to Diego, Lucas and Paco, says, “In my house, it’s usually whoever asks for it first that gets the day off. But if the person who asks second has a more important reason, like a health emergency, I’ll ask the one who asked first if she is willing to swap days off.”


    As the head of the household, it is then up to you to grant the request of your help. Remember to always be just and give a fair assessment before making a decision.

    Who’s the boss?
    Sometimes, it can’t be helped that you will have a helper who will decide to step up and assume the lead role, most especially when the tenure of this particular maid or yaya has lasted for years. But unless you have established that that one maid or yaya is indeed above everyone else when it comes to ranking, she doesn’t have the right to take charge. “Put her in place because there is only one boss and that’s you. Sometimes, they don’t have the right manner of speaking that’s why they sound bossy. Make her realize how she sounds,” Cantada advises.


    Click here to read more about how to establish yourself as the employer to your helper and how to handle a tattle-tale yaya.

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