'Mom, Thank You Dahil Pinayagan Mo Akong Mag-Law Kahit Gusto Mong Maging Doctor Din Ako'

As parents, we only want the best for our children. Sometimes, we go overboard and dictate what we want them to be based on our own experiences.

However, we need to be reminded once in a while that our children, young as they are, are unique individuals who may have dreams that are different from ours.

The journey of Stef Turiano Peralta, a successful bar passer, serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of supporting our children's dreams.

Big shoes to fill

Stef Turiano Peralta was among the 3,992 individuals who passed the Bar Examinations held in November 2022. 

Stef told Smart Parenting that her mother Jasmin Turiano is a renowned doctor for her achievements and one who is very passionate about helping others. That's why she felt that it was a given that she would follow in her footsteps. 

"Actually, when I was in kindergarten, I would often answer “When I grow up, I want to become a doctor”. It was just expected of me," Stef said in an interview via Messenger. 

Growing up, Stef realized she didn't want to be compared to her mom. But because of her mom, she wanted to have a title as well.

"Then I became a part of a debate team in high school, and the rest is history," she told Smart Parenting.

READ ALSO: Caught On Cam! Watch This Proud Son's Reaction When He Found Out His Mom Passed The Bar

Forging her own path

After passing the Bar, Stef took to Facebook to express her gratitude, with her mother being at the top of her acknowledgments. 

"Thank you kasi pinayagan mo akong mag-law school kahit alam kong gusto mo maging doctor din ako." --Atty. Stef Turiano Peralta

"Mommy Jasmin, where do I even start? I owe my life to you and I cannot thank you enough for everything you have done for me. Thank you kasi pinayagan mo akong mag-law school kahit alam kong gusto mo maging doctor din ako."

She continued, "Thank you sa suporta nung gusto ko muna ng break after grumaduate ng law kaya hindi muna ako nakapag take ng Bar nung February, thank you sa pasensiya, sa sipag na puntahan ako sa condo, sa lahat lahat ng sakripisyo mo para marating ko kung nasan ako ngayon."

READ ALSO: 'Attorney At 65,' Proud Son From Southern Leyte Shares Mom's Inspiring Bar Journey

Like her mom, but different

Although Stef didn't become a doctor as originally expected, she promised her mom that she would strive to be like her, but in her own unique way. "I will be the lawyer version of Doc Jas — caring, compassionate, loving, and selfless. I hope I will make you even more proud in the future."

"Trust that dreams are meant to be fulfilled, and as parents, I hope you dream with them." -- Atty. Stef Turiano Peralta

Now a full-fledged lawyer, Stef hopes that her story will inspire other parents to support their children in whatever path they choose.

"I hope that my Mom would inspire other parents about the importance of being supportive towards their children’s dreams. I’m so grateful my Mom allowed me to pursue law because if she didn’t, my dream would not have become my reality now."

She stressed, "Trust that dreams are meant to be fulfilled, and as parents, I hope you dream with them."

Support from parents plays a crucial role in a child's life

In an article by marriage and family therapist Beverly Amsel, PhD, she explained that the involvement of parents has a lot of influence to the self-esteem and self-confidence of a child.

"While it helps that children know their parents are there to support them practically and emotionally, parents also need to be comfortable stepping back to allow their children to make decisions, struggle, fail, and succeed," Dr. Amsel said.

"This balance between providing support and giving children the freedom to discover their own individual desires, strengths, and weaknesses is the basis of how children develop self-confidence and self-esteem," she added.

Smart Parenting Board of Experts member, Gail Galang, PhD, meanwhile said in a previous article about helicopter parenting, that some parents tend to become obsessed with perfection and do not let their children to fail.

She reminds parents, "Allow children to feel some level of distress to build their adversity quotient (AQ), so they do not easily sink into debilitating depression at the mere experience of roadblocks later on in life." Read the full article here.

Read how a dad supports his son's hopes and dreams to become a sirena, here.

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