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An Apology Letter to My Parents Who Take Care of My Children
To read this story in Tagalog, click here.
  • Dear Mom and Dad, 

    I have always been thankful how you’ve helped us raise our kids while my husband and I worked.

    You’ve been there from Day 1 — bathing and feeding them, cleaning up their mess, playing with them, and taking them to school. You’ve showered them with much love.

    I never thought that I should be sorry for all that you’ve done for us until I heard what other people were saying. So, I made this apology letter in the hopes that I can express my gratitude.

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    For all those years, I’m sorry.

    I am sorry for making you exhausted and taking away your chance to enjoy and relax. I had thought that it was enough to take my kids during the weekend to give you some time off. Then I heard other people say that it would have been better if you could have a vacation (without the kids, of course). I felt guilty that I never even thought of it because I had other priorities — because I knew you would understand. 

    I have never thought how other people might see it. Now I feel like I’ve deprived you of getting time to rest and enjoy your life. I am very sorry for that.

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    I am sorry that we were not able to get a nanny to help you from the start. If I could bring the kids to work all day, every day, I would. Getting a nanny was our last option, and thankfully, you agreed because you were also not comfortable getting a stranger to look after the kids while we were away.

    I felt horrible passing on this responsibility to you. We thought it would help if we gave you the money for a nanny. I thought it was okay because you agreed to it, too.

    Then I asked someone for advice how to give you free time this summer. It hurt when he said, “Binibigyan mo naman sila ng pera. Bakit hindi na lang nila alagaan ang mga bata?”


    Hindi ko pinapaalagaan sa inyo ang mga anak ko dahil lang binibigyan ko kayo ng pera.

    He was somehow insinuating that I require you to take care of the kids because you get paid for it. We needed help, and we thought you were the best people to assist us.

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    I am sorry that you get hurt and stressed because of us. It hurts each time I hear you rant about taking care of the kids.

    In the heat of the moment during one of your rants, I asked how you were able to say those words, and I questioned whether you really loved my kids, Despite your apparent sacrifices. I thought I was giving you favors. I even compared you to other grandparents who willingly took good care of their grandchildren.

    But I was wrong. It wasn’t your fault. It was ours.

    I am sorry that we married young and we left our kids to you to take care of while we are at work. I am sorry for disappointing you.

    I know you had big dreams for me, but I was not able to achieve them. I have given you a burden instead.

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    Given a chance, I would like nothing more but to be a stay-at-home mom and be with my kids all the time. Not all of us are blessed to be one. I’m lucky that I can feel fulfilled whenever I do simple chores for the kids and still feel like a mom. But I know these are nothing compared to what you’ve done for them since they were born.

    I am sorry for the chaos and the mess that my kids have brought to your life. Honestly, the chaos is music to my ears, but you have to experience this every day. I hope that somehow my kids will bring more happiness than stress to your life.

    I know that you will shrug your shoulders and say that I don’t have to apologize for anything. I know that you understand us more than the people who have nothing better to do than judge us. But I also want you to hear our side. Parenting is not easy, and we are blessed that you have been with us throughout the journey.

    We thank you for being there as our family grows. We love you!

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    This piece was originally submitted to SmartParenting.com.ph by a reader who wishes to remain anonymous. 

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