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  • Mom Says ‘Parent Sex’ Happens In 3.5 Minutes Between Changing Nappies And Cooking Food!

    You always have to be on alert in case the kids notice you're up to something naughty.
    by Kitty Elicay .
Mom Says ‘Parent Sex’ Happens In 3.5 Minutes Between Changing Nappies And Cooking Food!
PHOTO BY Shutterstock/Asia Images Group
  • They say your relationship as partners change the moment you have kids and that includes your sex life. With little ones around, you might find yourself having to sneak around to do the deed and most of the time, it’s rushed.

    Don’t worry, you are not alone. Moms and dads all over the world are having “parent sex,” as Australian blogger Constance Hall dubs it. She accurately paints a picture in a viral Facebook post she wrote back in 2016.

    “We had ‘parent sex’ yesterday.

    “You know what parent sex is, it’s that 3.5 minutes you get between changing nappies and making food, where you notice that all of your kids are pretty distracted, where you realize it’s been almost a month since you banged and are starting to feel like flat mates.”

    The mom goes on to hilariously describe the way her husband seduces her to get some action. She even says they have to always be on alert to make sure their kids don’t notice they’re up to something naughty.

    “Where your husband’s seduction consists of one finger pointing towards the bedroom and the other hand on his dick, where you position the bed to have one foot against the door because for a loud bunch of kids, yours can be pretty quiet when they’re sneaking up on people.

    “Where no matter how hot it is you chuck the doona (quilt) on top of yourselves in case someone manages to barge through and catch mummy and daddy doing ‘yoga’ in bed,” Constance writes.

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    As parents, Constance also notes the best time for sex: When the kids are distracted while watching their favorite shows on the TV or on YouTube. We’re sure many of you do the same!

    She notes, “It’s a pretty romantic scene, really, listening to Iggle Piggle in the background, knowing your days are numbered when you hear the ad break.”

    For all the trouble it’s worth, Constance says their less than five minutes of lovemaking is still satisfying. She appreciates how her husband makes her feel wanted, “saggy boobs, baby belly pouch” and all.

    “Men are amazing and impressive creatures, by sheer determination, it’s inspiring how one can manage to ‘finish’ under circumstances, us women, aren’t always so easy.

    “All the while gleefully thinking about how much of a sex goddess, vixen you are and how your fella is finally going to stop being an arse for at least a whole day.

    “Well mine was pretty impressed, even if I just lied there, saggy boobs, baby belly pouch, hairy minge and all, he still thinks I’m amazing,” Constance wrote.

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    While reading her post, we’re sure a lot of parents — especially moms — can relate. In an informal online survey that SmartParenting.com.ph conducted in 2017, moms admitted that they do want more sex, but with their kids around, it comes with its own set of challenges.

    “Sex is now a luxury that we can’t afford to do more often,” shares one mom. But there is an upside: “Sex is more creative because we have to do it while the kids are asleep, so we do it in all places in the house,” said another.

    When parent sex is good, it’s really good. But we think men should also understand why there are moments why moms don’t find sex interesting anymore. Remember that there are ways to become intimate without having sex and it is worth waiting —and more exciting — for her to initiate the lovemaking herself.

    Parent sex is a struggle but it’s still important in any relationship. “Just remind yourself that it is part of who you are as a couple,” advises one of our survey respondents.

    There are ways to make sex exciting again! Click here for tips from a sex therapist.

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