KZ Tandingan Gave A Responsible Answer To The Baby Question

“Dito sa Pilipinas, laging nagtatanong, ‘Gaano na kayo katagal?’ Oh, bakit wala pa kayong anak?" host and actor Vice Ganda asked KZ Tandingan and TJ Monterde during their recent guesting on Gandang Gabi Vice. "Kayo, paano 'pag tinatanong kayo about dun?”

The singer, who is also known as “Asia’s Soul Supreme”, shared her honest take on parenthood: preparation is their responsibility as hopeful parents.

KZ answered, “Ever since naman, siya (TJ ) naman talaga 'yung nag-o-open up na gusto na niyang maging tatay. But it’s more on my side.”

“Nandun ako ngayon sa may mga gusto pa akong gawin sa career ko. May gusto pa kong i-build sa sarili ko, as a person, as a woman,” KZ said. “I want to make sure that I’m not a baby taking care of a baby.”

KZ added, “You will never be ready sa pagiging magulang. But I also think it’s your responsibility to at least try to be ready.”

KZ was not just talking about physical and financial readiness. She shared, “Pag sinasabihan kami, pera pera, yan may pera naman, sold out ang shows. For me, it just doesn’t end with that.”

“It’s a lifetime responsibility,” KZ told Vice Ganda.

KZ has had her own bouts of mental health concerns, which she also shared in the same guesting.

"Kasi nung time na yon, depressed talaga ako, like, depressed. I was pushing people away. And si TJ nandun din siya. Tapos sabi ko sa kanya, 'Makikipag-break na ako sa'yo kasi hindi ko na kayang bitbitin ka dito sa dark pit of depression na nararamdaman ko.' Tapos sabi niya, 'Alam mo, kung hindi mo kayang magmahal ngayon, ako ang magmamahal para sa ating dalawa.” KZ recalled her struggles from a few years ago.

She also said she refused to be affected by society’s pressure: “Ayaw ko na mag-anak lang ako because I was pressured to become a mom. Ayoko lang na maging nanay kasi kailangan magkaroon ng nag-aalaga 'pag tumanda.”

KZ also shared that she prayed about motherhood. “Nagkaroon din ako ng mahabang-mahabang conversation with God. Sabi ko, to be honest with You, alam Mo naman ang laman ng puso ko. But to be honest, I’m not saying I don’t want to be a mom. But I’m not yet ready to be a mom. If it is Your will na maging nanay ako, then plant that love in me to become a mom. Help me nurture that love to become a mom. Until it grows into something more than myself, na alam kong ready akong magmahal ng anak.”

Vice Ganda affirmed KZ’s statements, “You’re being reasonable and responsible as a woman and as a future parent. And every child deserves to have that parent.”

KZ Tandingan and TJ Monterde got married in an intimate wedding ceremony in August 2020 and then celebrated with a second ceremony three years later to fulfill their promise to their parents and family.

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