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Parenting => Real Parenting => The Balancing Act: Career and Family => Topic started by: annamariemomof3 on October 25, 2011, 08:45:37 pm

Title: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: annamariemomof3 on October 25, 2011, 08:45:37 pm
Basahin sa Smart Parenting:
'Deadma Is Key': Paano Maging Mas Confident Na Nanay, Ayon Sa Isang Stay-At-Home Mom
Click HERE.
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i was raised by yayas and had a hard time with emotional connection when i was growing up. even now i don' feel connected to my mom. so i vowed to myself that i will not let that happen to me and my kids. pero lately i've been feeling down kasi i feel pressured to work, parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom, what hurts the most eh yung mom ko pa madalas mag pressure sa akin, she keeps comparing me to my former classmates na kesyo doctor na daw o kaya napadala na parents sa abroad. di naman mayaman si hubby kaya we're just making ends meet pero di ba mas important ang kids more than any material thing? i feel so unappreciated and disrespected. :'(

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Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: on October 25, 2011, 09:06:08 pm
Awww.. Don't worry sis. Kaya mo yan, isipin mo na lang mas mahalaga mga anak mo kesa sa anupaman.
I am also a SAHM, panganay and working before i got pregnant. Honestly, hinahanap ko ang pagwork dahil nasanay na may kinikita ako at hindi humihingi kay hubby. Mahirap para sa akin, parang pride na din na humingi ng panggastos ko kay hubby.
Pero di ko kaya iwan baby ko para magwork, what i did, nag isip na lang ako ng business na pwede ko i-manage para may kinikita pa din ako kahit nasa bahay. :) supportive naman si hubby na magbusiness na lang. Dahil sa totoo lang parang ayoko na magwork, gusto ko kasama na si baby palagi. :)
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: rianne_mallows on October 25, 2011, 09:34:46 pm
i know what you mean.. kapag sinabi mo na sahmka.. "ah ok" parang ganun lang :P

huwag mo na lang pansinin.. maganda nga sinabi mo totoo kung bakit SAHM ka ngayon.. para matauhan mother mo
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: mamacharis on October 25, 2011, 09:37:33 pm
sa totoo lang hindi matutumbasan ng kahit na anong laki ng pera o kayaman man ang makita mo o ma witness yung milestone ni baby. iba yung feeling nun plus for me parang nakakaproud sa sarili na nag raise ka ng isang tao lalo na kapag lumaki siyang isang mabuting tao.

since mommy mo naman ang nagsasalita syo pasok sa kabila labas sa kabilang tenga na lang ang gawin mo sis. importante mai-raise mo ang anak mo sa paraan na gusto mo at alam naman natin na mabuting paraan yan.

tama ka para sa ating mga ina at importante ang mga anak kesa sa ano mang bagay. wag mo masyado intindihin sinasabi ng mommy mo sis baka nagsesentimiento lang yun kasi may pangarap siya sayo which is pwede pa naman dahil hindi pa huli ang lahat.
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: babyblair on October 25, 2011, 11:30:08 pm
sis, wag mo na lang pansinin mom mo sa mga sinasabi niya. she doesnt know how it is like to be a SAHM kaya nonsense.

don't make a big deal out of it. ma-stress ka lang. never kikitain ng working mom ang mga milestones ng baby na you get to see first hand.

mothers who have been/ are in your shoes are all proud of you! :)
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: momi95 on October 26, 2011, 02:32:11 am
sis, sahm din ako since i gave birth sa eldest ko na 16years old na ngayon. me mga panahon talaga na me magco-comment sa status natin. pero, looking at my daughters, at pag iniisip ko na nasa tabi nila ako at nabantayan ko ang paglaki nila is priceless. kahit anong degree na natapos natin, it's something na mas precious kesa sa diploma...
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: alymme on October 27, 2011, 09:43:05 pm
Hi, nakaka relate ako sa concern mo, just resigned from my 15yrs of working in just 1 company (this is my first job) that's why it's really hard to decide. I received mixed reactions on this decision, and right now I feel pressured also. Since i resigned last Aug, my problematic son (in school only) became worse than before. But i still don't give up, sabi nga I only have two ways on how to deal with it. It's either breakdown or breakthrough. Isipin mo na lang, ang pagsubok was given to you to make you grow. Don't forget to pray always for guidance.. kaya mo yan.. Tama sila mas importante ang family natin kesa sa material things. Talagang ganyan realizations will come later.

Mom Mye
http://newfulltimemomjournal.blogspot.com/2011/10/high-expectations-can-lead-to.html
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: unknown on October 28, 2011, 12:14:32 am
Iniisip ko nga rin yang mga criticisms na ganyan.  I just gave my resignation last week dahil nga i'm not happy my work anymore and i tend to be a sahm napagusapan na rin namin ni hubby na need ko na rin talaga mag sahm muna kasi maselan talaga yong anak namin he was confined last friday actually pangalawang beses na to na na hospitalized kaya we really talked about it decided na i should quit my work kasi wala nga talagang makakatutok sa anak namin since abroad rin siya.  Huwag mo na isipin yong mother mo sis ang impt hindi ka naman sa kaniya kumuha na kinakain niyo sa araw araw at nasu-sustain naman ng partner mo ang pangagailangan niyo sapat na yon.  Contentment yan ang keyword diyan at kung happy ka to be sahm.
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: Lelen on October 28, 2011, 12:32:38 pm
Being a SAHM makes me really proud! A lot of my friends & former classmates say na I'm lucky kase di ko na kelangang mag work which I totally agree! Don't get me wrong, hindi kami mayaman! Hindi namin kayang basta makisunod sa uso o bumili ng mga latest na gadgets na gusto namin. Kelangang mag-budget pa din kami, kelangang mag-plano muna if we want to go out of town. Kaso kase I believe na depende yun sa priorities. And our main priority is our son. I cannot picture myself doing anything or being anywhere na di kasali o malayo sa anak ko. And for that I ALWAYS thank my hubby for making me a SAHM  ;D
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: sheizzhynazh on October 28, 2011, 12:48:08 pm
Hi mga sis.
Ako naman still cannot decide SAHM or working mom parin.
True iba ang pakiramdam pag iakw kasama ng mga babies mo, bukod sa walang sisihan kung ano man mangyari sa kanila, relax ka pag iakw kasama nila. Actually mas gusto ko nga pag walang pasok, sama ko nga kay medyo mababa sales ng company namin now kaya cost cutting sa lahat pati days of work. Habang nag-eemote mga tao na bakit walang pasok ako naman deep in inside nagbubunyi kasi masmahaba time ko sa mga kiddos ko.
Problem kasi namin walang magbabantay sa mga bata, my daughter is 3yrs old & son is only 1yr old. Nakailang palit narin kasi kami ng yaya, pero now meron nanaman. Sabi ko sa sarili ko pag umalis pa ulit itong ngayon baka sign na talaga na mag stop na ako sa work ko. Going to 11yrs na ako sa company, di rin ako masyadong happy sa salary ko but still nagtityaga ako kasi parang nasanay nalang din ata ako. Kasi iniisip ko wala naman akong ginagastos sa bahay o tungkuling bayarin puro si hubby ang bayad sa bills even sa food, binibigyan niya rin ako ng pera. Akin lang yung sweldo ko na di naman kalakihan, actually niloloko nga ako ni hubby kung may sinusweldo daw ba ako? kasi parang wala din naman talaga. But still di parin ako makapagdecide kung stop na ako o tuloy parin. Pero gusto ko din ako alaga sa mga anak ko. Kasi iba din talaga care na mabibigay sa kanila. After work ko dakilang nanay naman ako sa kanila, kaya wala na rin talaga akong extra time for myself, sila naman din kasi talaga buhay ko. Work ko parang to unwind nalang siguro sarili ko, para ibang environtment naman.
Psencya na kayo, nashare ko lang ang sitwasyon ko now. Gusto ko personally take care of my kids, pero parang gusto ko din work para din naman sa mga kids ko, para mag may gusto akong bilin for them diko na need pang humingi sa hubby ko.
I hope naintindihan nyo story ko  ;)
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: riddermark on October 28, 2011, 02:14:01 pm
ako naman matagal ko nang sinasabi mag SAHM na lang ako pero di ko magawa. even right now na i think i should be there for my eldest kasi special sya and he's just starting to learn pa lang. ang main prob namin is budget at makakasama. i have 2 sons (1yr ang pagitan). di namin kakayanin ang therapies kung hindi ako makakatulong mag earn. plus yung kakarampot na benefits nakukuha ko from the cmpany (14th and HMO). actually hindi naman promising ang career ko. habol ko lang is benefits na malaki ang naitutulong sa akin.

if i stay at home i also need a helper kasi 2 babies e. but now's the time that i really feel i need to be there for my sons. though ok na ok ang yayas namin pero matagal na rin sila gusto magpahinga. i cant do it alone. hirap pa naman maghanap ng mapapagkatiwalaan.

matagal ko na itong dilemma na hindi ko pa rin mapagdesisyonan.
Title: Re: being a stay at home mom
Post by: sheizzhynazh on October 28, 2011, 04:23:14 pm
sis riddermark, ganun din ako benefits lang habol ko sa company. sa salary kasi di naman kawalan. Kaya naman ni hubby ang expenses, pero sabi ko nga as of now, kasi habang lumalaki mga bata lalong lumalaki gastos.

Kala ko nga magreresign na talaga ako, kasi 1time di bumalik yung yaya, kasi every sun off niya, kaya din wala akong pahinga, sat halfday sa office pero pagdating ko aalis naman si yaya balik niya sunday usually pa sun na siya balik kaya todo pagod pero fulfilling naman pag kasama mga kiddos. Sinet ko na sa isip ko na bukas magpafile na ako kasama baby ko kasi walang magbabantay tapos early morning dumating kaya sabi ko go parin sa work, pero once na umalis siya sign na siguro yun.

Sana nga pwede magleave ng 1-2 months tapos work ulit...
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: annamariemomof3 on October 31, 2011, 02:28:55 pm
there are times lang talaga that i feel down and unappreciated. siyempre when you're a SAHM la ka naman suweldo, it's a 24/7 job, madalang makaalala mag thank you, when you're doing your job right (disciplining them) minsan ikaw pa masama, wala kang karapatang magkasakit, you won't really know if you're doing a great job until they are grown ups na. pero isa lang naman ang iniisip ko whenever i feel down i remember that time when i was still working at a hospital and my son was sick, i stayed with him to take care of him but still he cried out for his yaya, that broke my heart into a million pieces. so now i guess i just have to learn to tune them out, care ko ba sa mga sinasabi nila, bakit kaya ba nila to take care of a 7 y/o, tutor him, take care of 1 y/o twins, do the housechores, and still manage to have some me time. being a SAHM is not for everyone, a lot are not cut out for it, it's the hardest job in the world.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: lykeil on November 05, 2011, 06:02:14 pm
When I was working on my 20's I say to myself, if I have a family of my own, I will take care of my kids even I became a-stay-home-mom and now, nagawa ko nga and I am so glad on what I accomplish of taking care of my 3 kids alone without even a househelp. My point is.. it is our own choice. You see how a child would be so unhappy kung iiwan lang talaga sa yaya. People would compare my kids with theirs kasi although they buy all the expensive material things for their kids yet it felt so incomplete. Tapos I am happy and contented kasi nga alam ko kung ano needs ng mga anak ko and with simple toys they appreciate it much. Tapos pagtinuruan ko mga anak ko.. I teach them well meaning with all our hearts and knowledge unlike sa yaya lang.. limited lang ang ituturo sa mga bata. (sana you get what I mean) Anyways, even my in-laws were amaze nga on my kids development kasi yung isang pamangkin ni hubby e di pa rin marunong kumain mag isa at age 2 eh, yung bunso ko na nasa 1.5 years old can use fork and spoon very well.

OO, financially kinakapos.. oo, di natin mabili masyado mamahaling gamit or laruan or damit for our kids kung di tayo nagwo work but the true love and closeness mo with your kids.. di nga matutumbasan ang joy and fullfillment na mararamdaman mo.

So, if you are still young and haven't work to the fullest.. you can still make some extra income pa rin naman para kahit paano may pera ka nang sarili kung minsan may papabili mga anak mo sayo.. di ka naman malulungkot na wala kang contribution financially. And your mom would be proud of you kasi napagsasabay mo ang pag aalaga ng mga anak mo tapos may sarili ka pang income on your own effort. 

So be happy and give yourself a hug! Even now people would comment to you these and that.. but someday you will benefit for all of your own hardwork and hindi talaga mababalik ang panahon kaya sulitin mo na with your kids and hubby.  : )

Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: rianne_mallows on November 05, 2011, 07:25:09 pm
just finished reading "secrets of a fascinating womanhood"

it says there that a woman's God-given role is to nurture.. and for the man, to provide ..

ive been  a SAHM since i married..  im really happy with our decision for me to stay at home and take care of our baby.. although there are times that i feel guilty because im not able to help hubby with the finances.. he assures me that he's happy providing for baby and me

but after reading the book, i came to understand my hubby's POV.. as in exact match hubby ko ng examples sa book..
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: on November 10, 2011, 10:47:37 pm
^^sis baliktad naman tayo.. Ako nun sabi ko sa sarili ko pag nagkababy ako gusto ko magwork pa din.. And here i am, wala ng planong magwork.. I am trying to llook for a nice business na lang or any stay at home job para makasama lang si baby. I want to see her and be with her sa lahat ng oras. :)
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: CIB on November 11, 2011, 04:24:30 pm
The key word there sis is serenity.

I have read also what sis rianne_mallows have read. And I found there what I was lacking everytime I felt like when people also are looking down on me when I tell them Im a SAHM. I remember a pedia na pinuntahan ko dati dahil wala yung doctor ng anak ko. And I couldnt shake the smirk she has on her face nung tinanong niya ako kung nag work ako. She said like "Ohhhh..."  when I told her na sa bahay lang ako. That got me really depressed for days and got me thinking kung bakit nga ba housewife lang ako at hindi career woman tulad ng iba.

After reading the book in fairness pag may nagtatanong na sa akin kung ano ginagawa ko. Sinasagot ko ng isang mala Ms. Universe na sagot . Im a housewife. Nag-aalaga ng baby ko.  :D at hindi na ako nakakaranas na tignan na parang wala namang kwenta ang ginagawa ko.

I learn to be proud of what I am. Of what I choose to do in this Life. Tulad lang din ng ibang career, I have chosen the most noble one. To be a homemaker. And I am happy. And nobody could make feel guilty about it. Being happy. Sabi nga walang basagan ng trip  ;D Masaya ako eh. Kaya pag naaalala ko pa rin yung doktora na yun naiisip ko siguro kaya ganun reaction niya sa akin kasi siguro hindi sya masaya sa buhay niya. Kaya ngayon everytime na nakikita ko yung mga former classmate ko saka mga dati ko katrabaho naiinggit pag sinasabi kong SAHM ako. They could be managers now, and naiinggit ako minsan. But ganun din naman sila sa akin and feeling ko mas successful ako on the field that really matters. Dahil sila nanghihinayang sa akin pero ako hindi nanghihinayang sa kanila. Feeling ko walang katumbas pa rin na halaga yung bahay ko na masaya sa ipapalit ko kung sakali na magwo-work ako. So hanggat kaya pa ni hubby na indulge ako susulitin ko talaga  :D

Cheer-up sis  ;D  Feeling mo man hindi ka na-appreciate ng mga tao that matters na-appreciate ka naman ng mga taong katulad mo. Im so proud of you and Thank you dahil iilan lang ba yung mga babaeng handa talagang isakripisyo ang lahat-lahat sa buhay nila sa ngalan ng pamilya  :)

Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: dhangcabuang on November 11, 2011, 04:40:17 pm
just like what most mommies told here, don't be sad or madepressed if you're a SAHM. saludo at taas kamay ako sa mga SAHM. naging SAHM ako ng 1 1/2 year at di ko pinagsisihan yon though nakakarindi yung paulit ulit na tanong na "Di ka na pumapasok?" Bakit?nag ssmile lang ako.di ko naman obligasyong sagutin silang lahat..

@sisCIB - swerte ko pala kasi yung pedia ng mga anak ko, tuwang tuwa naman pag nagaabsent ako pra sa check up nila or sa injection nila.

Basta for me, being a SAHM is the best job ever!

Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: unknown on November 11, 2011, 04:46:12 pm
^ Ganyan din ako nung nagresign ako dito sa office even my own family wala rin akong ligtas grabe ang sasama ng reaction nila parang it's a big crime.
Tama ka sis sabihin na lang natin na kaya siguro ganun ang reaction nila eh kasi andun yong envy this is no offense meant for those working moms this are my point of view because not all wives are given the privilege to be a sahm mom.
Like sa akin nung nagwowork ako tapos wala akong choice but to work kasi hindi pa stable si hubby naiingit talaga ako dun sa nagresign tapos nagagawa nila yong gusto nila like taking care of your very own family nakikita mo lahat ng milestone instead of entrusting it someone else if my choice na ako na yon why not.
Iba iba na kasi klase ng tao/ moms meron naman na mas preferred mag-work talaga kahit my choice kasi na puwede naman hindi kasi they feel more secured as you said sis CIB kanya kanya nga lang yan walang basagan ng trip  ;D
Respect each others point of view at kung ayaw naman respect prayer na lang sis para hindi maging polluted ang heart ang mind mo as long as your happy and you feel fulfilled on your chosen path.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: kissablesam on November 11, 2011, 04:54:14 pm
I honestly envied SAHMmies here, the joy of motherhood is to be with their sons/daughters 24/7 a day!
kung stable lang sana kami ni hubby, i will be forever stay-at-home-MOmma :)

Weno kung SAHM ka? Your doing a great job sis by being with your child eye-to-eye, hindi nagaga ng mga tulad kong WAHMmies yan.. so smile, dedma na sila!

Sis CIB ano po yun title nun book?
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: CIB on November 11, 2011, 05:01:21 pm
 :D

Nakakarindi talaga. Tsaka yung paulit ulit na sinasabihan ka ng "Sayang naman." Na parang ang t*anga mo na give-up yung work mo. Or yung mga chances mo. At lahat na lang ng tao eh hinayang na hinayang sa trabaho o "buhay" na pinakawalan mo. Isa yung sa mga issues ko ng post partum depression before. Nakakapagod magpaliwanag lalo na sa mga taong malapit sa iyo.

Pero at least ngayon nakikita naman nila na lumalaki ng maayos yung anak ko. Nakakatanggap na rin ako ng "award"  at "certificate of recognition" kahit paano. Kahit maliit na papuri sa anak ko lumulobo na yung puso ko.

Hahaha  ;D Ang babaw

@kissablesam- it's an ebook sis Secrets of Fascinating Womanhood. If your interested you can pm me your email I'll give you a copy  :)
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: kiddiedoc on November 11, 2011, 05:48:19 pm
I salute all the Stay at home mom:)! When I was still in my specialty training, ang dami kong namiss sa milestone ng anak ko, I wasn't there to triumph over his first step, and up to now nanghihinayang pa din ako..there were school activities I missed because I was in 24hour duty, there were times he was confined in the hospital and I can't be there because I have obligations to other sick kids, napaka ironic di ba? When you are taking good care of other sick kids tapos wala ka sa tabi ng anak mo who also needs your attention..those were the times I'm questioning myself if I'm really on the right track? That was 3 years ago..I didn't give up my career though, but I chose to have my private practice para manageable yung time,I have to give up my dreams to go into subspecialty training so us for me to spend more time with my kids..
I gave up my other clinics just to clear my morning schedule, my mornings and weekends is happily spent with my now 2 kids..afternoons is for clinics..
Does it make me any less as a person? Not at all!" Even if others would say sayang naman hindi ka na nagsubspecialize". I would just smile:) 3 years on specialty training is enough..everytime I'm hugging my kids I know I'm doing the right thing!
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: ea_brea on November 11, 2011, 07:28:25 pm
sa totoo lang inggit ako sa mga SAHM! im in retail kasi and long ang working hours namin, at ganito na lang ang inggit ko. ;D

hindi ko gets ang sinasabi ng ibang tao na sayang pag naging SAHM ka. next time na may nagtanong na lang sayo sagutin mo, sayang ang ano? wala naman makaktumbas sa panahon at effort mo sa pagpapalaki mo sa anak mo na tutok talaga.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: MommyMichell on November 17, 2011, 11:05:42 pm
hi sis, working mom din ako before pero got tired of working na so eto enjoy na enjoy maging SAHM, naku sis kung hindi naman problema finances kahit hindi ka nagwowork, pag may naglook down ulit sayo dahil sinabi mong SAHM ka, sabihin mo na lang no need ka ng magwork kasi kayang kaya na kayo buhayin ni mister, that'll shut them up ;)
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: mamacharis on November 18, 2011, 01:32:16 am
agree! may nagsabi na sakin nyan sabi sakin TAPOS KA NGA WALA KA NAMAN TRABAHO. kasi mga hindi nag iisip hindi naman porke hindi ka pumapasok ng otso oras eh wala ka ng trabaho at pera.

hay naku!!! nakakakulot ng bangs!! (ay wala pala ako bangs)
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: michi247 on November 18, 2011, 10:05:18 am
sis, naiintindihan kita, ako nga wal ako plan na maging stay at home mom kasi alam ko na mahirap pag isa lang ang magwowork sa min, pero nung nanganak na ko, hindi ko na maiwan yung anak ko, sabi ko pa nga pag nag 1yr old na siya siguro pwede na ulit ako magwork pero 3yrs old na son ko, stay at home mom pa rin ako.

may time na gusto ko talaga magwork pero isipin ko lang na iwan anak ko sa yaya, hindi ko na makaya, hindi rin kasi ko lumaki na kasama parents ko so alam ko yung feeling na lumaki na walang parents so ayaw ko maranasan ng anak ko yun. so mag full time mom ako as long as need niya ko. mahirap talaga lalo na pag nakikita mo na yung mga friends mo and classmate dati mga professionals na at ok ang career pero kung iisipin mo din, maraming working mom ang gusto rin maging stay at home mom pero wala sila choice kasi need nila magwork.

may friend nga ko na kapag nakakausap ko, lagi na lang may inooffer na opening sa ganito sa ganyan baka gusto mo mag-apply, parang feeling ko nanghihinayang siya sa kin pero lagi ko sinasabi saka na ako magwork.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: Anne Mercado on November 21, 2011, 07:56:36 pm
Aww.. sometimes parents are hard on you talaga. But try not to feel bad because if you know you are doing the right thing (staying home to raise your children) and you aren't hurting anyone, then what other's say shouldn't matter. Everyone thinks and feels differently about certain topics. They have their own views, you have yours.

Besides, a full-time mom's job isn't easy! I find it easier controlling problems at work than dealing with my 4 year old at times :P
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: sasha on November 26, 2011, 03:55:21 am
Hi sis dont be sad ok lang yan SAHM din ako and im proud of if. Kahit mom ko din pinipilit akong mag trabaho. Pero my MIL ok lang sa kanya infact proud pa siya kasi nakatutuk ako sa apo niya. Syempre mas importante ngayon ang anak mo na sis. Cheer up
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: toughmom moderator on January 12, 2013, 09:57:17 pm
I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can.  I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work the more I live. 
The 7 Habits of Highly Efficient Homemakers
(http://www.smartparenting.com.ph/images/site-alpha/articles/homemaker2-web.jpg)
http://www.smartparenting.com.ph/home-living/homebase/-the-7-habits-of-highly-efficient-homemakers/page/4
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: babyblaire on January 12, 2013, 10:15:20 pm
sis, we have a same situation, mom ko ganyan din buti pa mga klasmate ko na sa ibang bansa na,p ero i stay firm to my choise to stay at home and give my full time to my daughter, i feel so happy kahit pagod, iba parin talaga pag hands on ka sa baby mo, ang mom ko kasi hindi naka full time sa min nang brod ko dahil nag work siya, kaya hindi niya na understand yung side, i grow-up na malayo yung emotional feeling ko sa mom ko, at ayaw ko na mangyari din sa anak ko yun, i told my mom whats the use of having such dollars in my pocket while my child suffering from emotional stress, yun hindi na sumagot mom ko, minsan kasi nakaka pikon na mom ko, but ngayon medyo na accept na din niya ag reason ko. goodluck to you sis, pray lang lagi para ma enlighten din ang mom mo.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: momchronicles on March 03, 2013, 09:13:01 pm
Hi mga sis! I used to be a banker and later on decided to be a full time mom..yes, a lot of people don't understand my decision but I remain firm with being a full time mom..Here's my experiences and insights as a career woman turned full time mom. Please check these out:

http://momchronicles.com/on-the-other-side-of-the-pasture

http://momchronicles.com/how-i-became-a-jobless-working-mom
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: Mariel Arun on March 05, 2013, 12:28:47 pm
Hi, I have been to both worlds (SAHM & WM) but believe me I really prefer the first.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: jar on March 05, 2013, 03:32:37 pm
Hi mga sis for me mas mahirapan maging SAHM compare sa nagwork ka kasi kala ng mga Tao madali Lang na NASA Bahay ka nagaalaga ng kids and taking care sa mga  Gawain sa house well I appreciate my Mom more kasi ang Hirap din pala yung NASA Bahay Ka.. Well syempre and reward naman being beside your kids kaya Meryl na write-off ang Hirap  ;D
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: preciouslara on March 10, 2013, 09:24:35 pm
im so proud to be a SAHM, madami din ako nadidinig na comments na sayang pinag aralan ko etc etc, well i really dont mind them, i just reply minsan pag naiirita ako sa kausap ko na akala mo kung sino, i just reply na, hubby can provide well enough that i dont need to find a job..and besides mas mahirap maging SAHM no dayoff,24/7taking care of the kids ,hubby and the house diba... ;D
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: sophischekada on March 30, 2013, 07:16:50 am
good morning!

sobra ako nakakarelate, but i have a big Q, what if si hubby ang nagpaparamdam sayo na sobrang worthless ka because mas pinili mong maging SAHM ? mas masakit un buti nga ikaw mommy mo lang, di mo kasama araw-araw pag nagkita lang kayo, ako sobrang stress na at sobrang sad, di naman ako asa lang kahit pano may mga sideline naman, bakit ganito ang pakiramdam ko, ano gagawin ko ?
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: mejhez on March 30, 2013, 09:16:47 pm
Aw... my mom is a SAHM uhm like forever.... And i chose to be  the opposite when i graduated and entered in a relationship.. and now that i have a baby, believe me, i envy those SAHM... why? Because i cant be like them... its not that i dont have a choice or i dont want to guide my daughter or something kaya lang siguro hindi ko kaya tumigil ng bahay... nangangati talaga paa ko... oh well, i just wish i can be like you mommies... doing all the household chores and guiding your kid is really a challenging role. Bigger than any position in a company. Well it is a huge challenge for me... haha... kaya saludo ako sa mga SAHM eh... for now di ko talaga kaya.... pag napapagalitan ako, kasi i dont want to stop working, i always telling them na darating din yung time but not now... tinitingnan ko pa lang yun nanay ko nahihirapan na ako eh... hehhe...
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: anerba :) on May 02, 2013, 12:13:51 pm
Nakakarelate tlaga ako...

Same situation here...Kaya I told myself aalagaan ko tlaga anak ko. (well, blessed kase napagbigyan ako ng opportunity ni God na maging full time mom)

Actually, sacrifice nga ang maging SAHM lalo na sa college graduate pero hindi lahat naappreciate ang SAHM.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: Momsi on May 09, 2013, 04:02:08 pm
Hi! Nakakarelate ako sa story  mo mommy.  I was a regular office employee two years ago.
Until  the time I decided to give up my long time work in favor of my son.  I feel so blessed to
have a very loving and supportive hubby. I think mas important yung time na kasama ko ngayon
ang anak ko & kahit anong activities merun sya sa school, I'm always there to support him. Unlike
ibang students, nakakaawa mga kids, kasi during family day affair or recognition sa school, mga
yaya lang ang kasama nila.

Kaya I don't have any regrets sa naging decision ko... Hindi ko man nabibili lahat ng gusto ko, unlike
nung may regular income pa ako... Okay lang, masaya naman ang anak ko na lagi akong kasama
sa bahay.

We also need a good foundation b/w sa parents & child/children. Kung lagi tayo nasa tabi nila to
guide them & let them feel na they are loved. Yung respect at love ng mga anak sa parents nabi-build din.

Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: babythug28 on May 10, 2013, 04:52:43 pm
inspiring yung mga posts nyo dito mga fellow SAHMs. i have relatives na kapag nagkikita kami lagi na lang akong kinukumpara sa mga anak niya na may work, kumikita ng pera, pero walang mga BF. sayang naman daw bakit nag aalaga lang ako ng mga bata kung pwede naman kumuha ng yaya at makapagtrabaho ako. mas okay daw yung may sariling pera tulad ng mga anak niya, blah blah.

sinasabi ko na lang with pride: Kaya naman ni hubby, no need for me to work.

pero minsan nakakadown lang din talaga. yung feeling ko, i wish i could do more to grow as an individual and help na din hopefully sa finances ng family namin.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: kissablesam on May 15, 2013, 05:49:48 pm
Had been SAHM for just about 3 months now and at some point, there were days na naramdaman ko parang nga pero I didnt let it affect me, instead I ignored. theres no sense letting them in my system when I know for a fact na I am doing my very best as a stay at home mudda.. Okay lang kung idegrade nila ako because I am just a SAHM but hey, being SAHM means being with your children 24/7 and i am fortunate of having that opportunity..
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: annamariemomof3 on May 29, 2013, 05:13:27 am
good morning!

sobra ako nakakarelate, but i have a big Q, what if si hubby ang nagpaparamdam sayo na sobrang worthless ka because mas pinili mong maging SAHM ? mas masakit un buti nga ikaw mommy mo lang, di mo kasama araw-araw pag nagkita lang kayo, ako sobrang stress na at sobrang sad, di naman ako asa lang kahit pano may mga sideline naman, bakit ganito ang pakiramdam ko, ano gagawin ko ?

yes I guess lucky pa rin ako kasi whenever I ask my husband if he needs me to work, he always answer no kahit na obvious na hirap na hirap na rin siya minsan. and when sinusumpong ako minsan he gives me budget pang unwind while he takes care of the kids. you know what better ask him na lang talaga ng direchahan baka naman nag vevent out lang siya na nahihirapan siya to make ends meet pero he doesn't mean to belittle you or put pressure on you. minsan di ba need lang nila ng sounding board kasama sa role natin yun eh. wag na lang ganung sensitive (I really should take my own advice). kapag naman kinuwenta mo babayaran ninyo sa yaya, labandera, cook, tutot at etc baka sa kanila na lang mapunta suweldo mo plus di naman nakakabili ng tlc di ba. so cheer up, you're actually saving him money by doing the job of 10 people. ;)
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: Nanay ni Liam on May 29, 2013, 11:40:45 am
Hi mommies! Pa-vent lang. Opinions and suggestions are welcome :)

My son got sick last week and sinamahan ako ng 1 araw ng mil ko para mag-alaga kay baby.
Nung afternoon, she asked kelan daw ako magwowork uli (i resigned kasi nung di pa kami makabuo pero nabuntis naman ako the same month nung mag-resign ako)...2mos pa lang baby ko and i gave birth thru cs.
I told her "ma, ayaw po kasi ni hubby na mag-work ako. Gusto niya sa bahay na lang para maalagaan ko si liam"..
She said wag ko daw sundin si hubby at pilitin ko sya.
I told her wala din namang promising career ang nurses dito sa Pinas and she answered mag-abroad daw ako.
Eh alam naman nyang ayaw ng anak niya na mag-abroad ang isa sa amin kasi i left the country in 2008, tho nag-survive relationship namin, ayaw na daw ni hubby ma-experience uli un since his work here is paying well naman.
Mil kept talking na kesyo di kami yayaman dito, sayang pinag-aralan ko, etc..so i kept mum na lang.
That night kinwento ko kay hubby ang sinabi ng mom niya. He said wag ko na lang pansinin. Kaso ang hirap naman na everytime magkita kami ni mil nauungkat ang pagbabalik ko ng work. Nakakaloka! Si hubby kasi dati ang kasama niya sa bahay and nagbabayad ng bills but since we moved out, kami na ang priority tho we still give her money, di na tulad ng dati.

I want to work din naman kaya lang everytime i look at my son, dko maimagine na dko mawiwitness ang mga milestones niya tsaka masyado pa syang baby para iwan, ayt? Naiinis lang talaga ako pag naiisip ko un. I told hubby na lang na wag na niya ko patulungan sa nanay niya next time. Mas malapit kasi si mil sa amin tsaka mom ko nagwowork and wala kaming maid kaya sa kanya humihingi ng help si hubby.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: Morefun on July 03, 2013, 06:38:00 pm
Hi sis!  Don't mind other people.  Hindi naman nila naiintindihan ang situation nating mga mommies.  Ako din ganun ang dilemma ko.  I wanted to stay at home but hubby asked me to work to augment our income.  With a sad heart I went back to work but I asked my husband to wait until our baby was 1 year old.  Ngayon, one year na ko nagwowork and my baby just turned two years old.  Another good thing is, I was able to get the schedule that I have always wanted.  Early Morning shift na ko.  That means I will go home after lunch.  I'm so happy to spend time with my baby. ;D
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: riaaaaaaaa88 on July 09, 2013, 05:43:32 pm
Hey, dont feel bad :) NEVER let anyone make you feel inferior without your consent, do not be affected by what your mom said. Kanya-kanya yan eh. If you feel a sense of fulfillment being a full-time mom, then go! You dont have to care about what other people would say. As long as you are happy then dont let anyone rain on your parade :) ipag-pray mo nalang na lumawak ang isip at pang-unawa nila para maintindihan nilang may mga bagay na mas importante kesa sa pera. :)
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: riaaaaaaaa88 on July 09, 2013, 05:48:58 pm
Hi mommies! Pa-vent lang. Opinions and suggestions are welcome :)

My son got sick last week and sinamahan ako ng 1 araw ng mil ko para mag-alaga kay baby.
Nung afternoon, she asked kelan daw ako magwowork uli (i resigned kasi nung di pa kami makabuo pero nabuntis naman ako the same month nung mag-resign ako)...2mos pa lang baby ko and i gave birth thru cs.
I told her "ma, ayaw po kasi ni hubby na mag-work ako. Gusto niya sa bahay na lang para maalagaan ko si liam"..
She said wag ko daw sundin si hubby at pilitin ko sya.
I told her wala din namang promising career ang nurses dito sa Pinas and she answered mag-abroad daw ako.
Eh alam naman nyang ayaw ng anak niya na mag-abroad ang isa sa amin kasi i left the country in 2008, tho nag-survive relationship namin, ayaw na daw ni hubby ma-experience uli un since his work here is paying well naman.
Mil kept talking na kesyo di kami yayaman dito, sayang pinag-aralan ko, etc..so i kept mum na lang.
That night kinwento ko kay hubby ang sinabi ng mom niya. He said wag ko na lang pansinin. Kaso ang hirap naman na everytime magkita kami ni mil nauungkat ang pagbabalik ko ng work. Nakakaloka! Si hubby kasi dati ang kasama niya sa bahay and nagbabayad ng bills but since we moved out, kami na ang priority tho we still give her money, di na tulad ng dati.

I want to work din naman kaya lang everytime i look at my son, dko maimagine na dko mawiwitness ang mga milestones niya tsaka masyado pa syang baby para iwan, ayt? Naiinis lang talaga ako pag naiisip ko un. I told hubby na lang na wag na niya ko patulungan sa nanay niya next time. Mas malapit kasi si mil sa amin tsaka mom ko nagwowork and wala kaming maid kaya sa kanya humihingi ng help si hubby.

Aw... :( sorry ha pero pakialamera naman ni MIL mo... I'm sure she means well and siguro sobrang concerned lang siya but it doesnt have to be at a point na nangingialam siya. As long as you and your hubby are okay with you staying at home then go lang sis! :)
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: mrs_mv on July 09, 2013, 07:47:05 pm
I'm a SAHM for about a year na rin siguro pero about two months ago ko lang natanggap whole-heartedly ang aking bagong "career". Ang hirap kasi na sanay ka magtrabaho tapos stay ka na lang sa bahay. Ang hirap din sa pride na may pinag-aralan ka naman tapos di mo magamit. Well, everything changes pagkatapos ko makarinig ng preach about making sacrifices. Ang sacrifice daw kasi talagang masakit at mahirap pero mas i-be-bless daw ni God ang marunong magsacrifice for the sake of other people. In my case, not other people naman... my own son!

My hubby has a good paying job naman at kahit hindi ako magwork kakain at makakipon pa rin kami. Actually, I work lang before for my own needs- selfish things.
Title: Re: parang people are looking down on me because i am a stay at home mom
Post by: Mommy Jazz on May 16, 2018, 05:49:27 pm
Today's Accomplishment: I Kept Human Beings Alive
(https://images.summitmedia-digital.com/smartpar/images/2018/05/11/alive-web.jpg)
Read about it on Smart Parenting. Click this link:
 https://www.smartparenting.com.ph/parenting/real-parenting/today-s-accomplishment-i-kept-human-beings-alive-a1149-20180513?ref=parentchat