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Topics - mamemi

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Romantic Relationships / Sexual Harassment
« on: March 28, 2013, 12:45:34 pm »
Scared to File a Sexual Harassment Case? Let 'Gabbie' help

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My husband would throw fits if he found out I shared this. Anyhow, I would, because I need advice from you, my fellow moms/wives/women.

This happened just this week. Of all weeks, holy week pa. Oh well, I realized it was very timely.

My husband didn't go to work (call center) for two days - Monday and Tuesday. At first I thought it was good as we have opposite working hours for this month. Time to bond, or so I thought.

Yesterday morning, I read his text message to his boss saying na hindi daw siya makapasok kase nahihiya siya because of an IR (Incident Report) filed against him. I didn't bother asking him about it kase papasok na din ako ng work. When I was in the office, nagtext siya: "Nabasa mo na pala. Hindi ko masabi sayo dahil alam kong magagalit ka. Sabihin ko na lang sayo mamaya pag uwi mo. Tatanggapin ko magiging reaksyon mo. I'm so sorry."

As soon as I got the message, I replied and urged him to tell me right there and then.Sabi ko hindi ko na kayang maghintay hanggang uwian. And then he replied with the most shocking text message I've received so far: "Kinasuhan ako ng Sexual Harassment ng officemate ko".

I didn't know what to say. I was dumbfounded. I wanted to go home and confront him but all I could ever do was to text him back: "Anong nangyari?"

Apparently, there was this one girl from their office who was... I don't know how to put this into acceptable words.. anyway, isang babaeng mahilig makipagbiruan ng green jokes. My husband described her as "one of the boys" and someone who "throws back green jokes" to men. So there. To make the story short, she and my husband were comfortable doing this in their office. My husband told me it was "nothing". He and their other coworkers were surprised when they learned that she filed this case against him kase nga daw, biruan lang yun, at pati naman yung girl ay nakikipagbiruan.

Now they're scheduled for an admin hearing. My husband is confident that he will not be terminated dahil may evidences naman daw na the girl is also "into" it. He has witnesses naman daw who can prove that it is not harassment.

I'm not sure how the laws about this go, sa totoo lang, parang mas nangingibabaw sa'kin yung thought na "bakit mo ginagawa yun sa ibang babae?". I mean, knowing what my husband is, I know na palabiro talaga siya with his close friends (men and women alike). Pero parang hindi ko matanggap na ganun din siya with others.

Ang sabi niya pa sa'kin, mukhang may gusto daw yung girl sa kanya pero hindi niya pinapatulan (tuwing nagyayayang uminom, hindi siya sumasama, which I know hindi naman talaga, hindi kasi siya manginginom).The girl even bought him food sometimes. Tinatanggap niya daw dahil "wala lang" naman daw yun at friend lang naman daw ang tingin niya dun. So parang out of frustration, kinasuhan daw siya ng girl.

I told him to counter-file the charges pero sabi niya natatakot daw siya dahil mayaman yung family nung girl at baka daw dalhin sa labas yung kaso.

He apologized for dragging me in the issue (as his wife, parang nadamay na din ako) and he promised to clear his name and prove that he isn't guilty.

To be honest, I don't know what to do. I'm so disappointed and hurt. Gusto ko siyang suportahan pero I want him to learn his lesson. Alam nyo yon? Until now, hindi pa din kami nag uusap ng maayos. I'm standing in the line between letting him do it by himself and supporting him. Kapag sinuportahan ko kase siya and in-encourage ko, parang tinolerate ko na din siya e. And I don't want him to feel that way dahil in the first place, may kasalanan din siya dun.

Haaaay. Advice naman mga sis. Thank you for reading. Ang haba yata. :(

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