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Author Topic: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?  (Read 24566 times)

hel

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #15 on: August 31, 2010, 01:58:26 pm »

hi sis. cheer up  ;D

close open ba daw at 7 months! talaga namang di na interest ng baby mo yon no! he he. he has advanced and nakatutok sya now with his communication skills.

my advise: hwag na patulan. ngiti ka na lang  :D

i feel for you. kasi nga narindi ka na and you cried because of these incidents. you can't change them but you can change the way you accept their comments.

pag negative pa din dating nila, pwede mo na ding ihirit na di na interest ng baby mo close open, he's past that. then smile ulit

i agree :) iba iba na rin naman kasi ang interest and kayang gawin ng mga babies at a certain age or month. at 7th months you can expect him to sit without support or stand well while holding your hands and speak dada or mama.
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xhingpie

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #16 on: August 31, 2010, 06:16:46 pm »

Salamat sa mga comments nyo. Ang laking gaan ng pakiramdam ko.
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hel

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #17 on: August 31, 2010, 06:24:37 pm »

you're welcome sis. :) may mga tao talagang ganyan na hindi talaga madaling i-please. basta mag-focus ka na lang po kay baby at marami pang milestones and developments na darating :)
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liams mom

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #18 on: September 01, 2010, 02:59:28 am »

hi sis xhingpie! :)

minsan talaga, mahirap talaga baliin yung mga nakasanayan na, lalo na pag mga elders natin. most of the time, close na yung isip nila sa mga bagay bagay kaya kala nila, yung opinions nila ang laging tama. just like what is happening in your case now. nasa culture na kasi natin mga Pinoy na dapat matuto ang mga babies ng mga basics like close open, allign, etc. as much as we would want not to make a big deal out of it, naiintindihan kita na nakakairita lang talaga, lalo na pag babies natin ang involved. we are very lucky na sa generation natin, we have a wide range of information na pwedeng makatulong sa'tin madetermine kung ano ang normal at ano ang hinde sa development ng babies natin. hirap din sabihin sayo na dedmahin mo na lang, kasi pag ganitong situation, affected talaga tayong mga mothers.
 siguro sis, ang gawin mo na lang, i-deviate mo na lang yung norms. kung iba talaga ang gusto gawin ni baby, let him. :) tapos yun ang i show off mo sa ibang tao. atleast, hindi typical si baby. just keep in mind na ibat iba talaga development ng babies, we cant expect na kung ano ginawa ni juan ay gagawin din ni pedro... atleast we know for ourselves na normal ang baby natin and hindi niya kailangan matuto ng close open just to please us. ;)

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mommy ni lijah

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #19 on: September 01, 2010, 07:13:32 am »

My baby is 7 month old and I am very happy with his development and things that he has learned on his own, but his Lola always compare him with his cousins, it's sad because she would say to my baby "Ay di marunong" when she'd ask my baby to do something things that his cousins already mastered, we tried teaching it to him to but he seems to be uninterested because he loves practicing other skills, like crawling and sitting down, and grunting, we think he's trying to talk and still don't know how. I guess I'm just sad that his lola does not see the things that he does that his cousins could not.

Babies develop differently and I don't think its fair to compare them.

hay sis hayyan mu na ang lola na yan, hehe sbihn mu ayaw niya po un ang gusto niya ay jack n poy hehe..

we dont have to compare ang mga babies kasi wala nmng parehong indibidwal. may mga strong at weak points tau..

sabihn mukay baby keepm it up, kung anong alam at kaya niya inurture mu.. :)

dadating din kayo jan sa close open na yan hehe

teach the" arimunding munding"  :)
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yhamsloveŽ

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #20 on: September 01, 2010, 10:26:40 am »

How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?

Wow ang sakit naman non. Ang hirap hindi magreact but you have to.

Kung ako nasa sitwasyon mo, kapag may nagsabi sa anak ko na "Ay hindi marunong", pwede kong isagot na "Oo nga po, hindi PA niya alam yan."

I think okay na yung ganon. No more side comments pa kase baka isipin pa na nakikipag compete ka. Just be humble for the achievements of your son. Hindi man katulad ng iba (dahil iba-iba naman talaga mga bata eh) at least may sarili siyang milestone di ba?

Baka naman when the Lola said it, she did not mean anything. Buka lang ba ng bibig. Pero wala naman talagang intensyong hindi maganda.

Hindi rin natin alam, malay mo pag may kausap na ibang tao yung Lola, pinagmamalaki niya yung baby mo sa iba;) o di ba ang sweet?  ;)

Kung parati niyang ginagawa yun, kahit sa mga apo niya na hindi na baby (meron ba), at kung yung baby mo lang ang nasi-single out, ibang kaso na yon.

Walang Lola ang hindi nagmamahal sa apo niya.  ;)
« Last Edit: September 01, 2010, 11:57:58 am by yhamsloveŽ »
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kidsrepublik

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #21 on: September 01, 2010, 10:33:57 am »

ako lagi ko sinasabi... no my baby is
"--special, she's one of a kind. there's no one quite like her that you'll ever find.  God made her just the way she supposed to be. and I'm so glad that He made you and me."

is actually a song haha! ... but i jokingly sing it to people who compares her to other kids/babies, para hindi ren ma-offend if magreact man ako ng bongga.

DeeCee

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #22 on: September 01, 2010, 11:51:00 am »

I read somewhere sa www.babycenter.com ata na "All babies are unique and meet milestones at their own pace". Pabayaan mo nalang kasi alam mo naman talaga potential ni baby. Malay natin when your baby grows up mas marami pa siyang achievements kesa cousins niya.  :P
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maiaurmatam

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #23 on: September 01, 2010, 12:12:54 pm »

Yup yup. Babies learn and develop skills at their own pace. Kaya kami ni Hubby hindi namin pinipilit na matuto si baby kung ayaw pa niya. We just introduce and show how things are done. We're very thankful nga that our baby is very observant kaya hindi mahirap turuan. Ang siguro late sa kanya is talking. He's 11 months old, about to turn 1 in 2 weeks, pero repeated syllables pa lang kaya niya: dadada, cacaca, gagaga, tatata, etc.

One of the reasons we fired old yaya is we heard her nagtaas ng boses kay baby when our little boy was asking to be carried. Sabi niya "Carry na lang ng carry, puro ka na lang carry. Dapat hindi na-carry, dapat matuto ka na maglakad. Sabi ni Lolo/Lola mo dapat marunong ka na maglakad bago ka mag-birthday!" Of course baby was crying. Kahit hindi pa siya marunong maglakad nun, nakakaintindi na siya ng emotions. We explained to yaya na kami nga na parents we don't pressure our son to do this or that. We let him play, enjoy, learn and discover at his own pace, at his own time. Kahit sabihin ni Lolo or Lola na dapat ganito or ganyan siya, it's a form of encouragement and their just expressing their wishes for their apo. Siyempre sila yung lalong excited and nangunguna to boast about their apo. But we never shout or raise our voice when talking to our baby. At his age, ang psychological need ng baby is to feel secure and loved. 1 year onwards, independence naman. In less than 2 weeks after yaya left, our baby made his first step, alone! Now we can't stop him from walking around! I'm just short of begging him to slowdown!  :)

I'm very blessed kasi kay Hubby mismo nanggaling na kapag narinig niya yung mom niya comparing his son, or tinatakot yung bata na "pity ka naman, iwan ka ni Daddy/Mommy" talagang sasawayin niya yung mom niya. So if in-laws yung problem mo, it's better na si Hubby yung kumausap, say its not healthy. Or give as a gift to your MIL yung Smart Parenting Guide: Yaya Manual, kahit photocopy lang ng section dun about Baby's Milestone Developments. And yes meron din sa Baby Center.

Goodluck!
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TineNiItoy

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #24 on: September 01, 2010, 12:33:20 pm »

di ko pa na-experience na i-compare ang baby ko sa iba tapos nega ang dating...i'm sure maiinis din ako...my Dad always compares my son with other kids pero syempre bida ang anak ko  ;D
mag-four months na baby ko sa saturday, di pa niya masyado kaya ang head niya especially pag-idadapa mo sya tapos kahapon lang sya nakitang dumapa ng kusa niya...eh diba nga, yung iba sa early part ng 3 months nila nagagawa na yun...lagi ko na lang iniisip na bawat bata ay iba..like adults, they differ from one another...what might interest your baby may be uninteresting to others...

kaya sis, isipin mo na lang na yung baby mo, bored sa close-open...higher dun ang level niya  8)  and look at your baby, based on our story, at his young age, he already knows what he wants, alam na nyang i-tap ka to get your attention...cher up sis!  ;)
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xhingpie

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #25 on: September 01, 2010, 12:53:18 pm »

in fairness naman to his Lola, very excited sya sa apo niya, inalagaan talaga kong mabuti nung buntis ako. I guess as a Mom parang sinaksak yung puso ko when I overheard her saying na kaya di marunong yung anak ko magclose open at align is dahil di namin tinuturuan and would make comments na ang tatalino ng mga cousins ni baby kasi marunong na ng mga bagay na yun, so meaning???

hubby is very understanding on how I feel and he says that papalakihin namin si baby ng hindi dahil sa kung anong expectations ng kahit sino pa.

Kaya ko naman yung pasok sa kaliwang tenga tapos labas sa kanan yung mga nega na comments. nakakarindi lang kasi EVERY TIME na lalapit si lola at hahawakan si baby, laging ipapagawa sa kanya yun, and kasunod nun is how good his cousins are and dapat turuan namin si baby.

Ineenjoy namin yung mga milestones ni baby, tama lahat kayo mga sis, ang important, happy sya on developing his skills, now he can sit unsupported, we hope that Lola can appreciate how strong his apo is and see that his cousins who were born a month ahead still can't do that.
« Last Edit: September 01, 2010, 01:16:42 pm by xhingpie »
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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #26 on: September 01, 2010, 01:13:01 pm »

dedma lang basta wag below the belt ang comments ;D natural na kasi to love your own at ipagmalaki ang child mo sa iba. meron tao nagyayabang pero di naman nila alam ang facts. like sabihin my son is "payat" daw when in fact tama lang ang weight niya for his age and built. pero yung apo or anak nila is mataba nga but overweight naman ::) meron saleslady, she asked for my son's age and she said "yung anak ko kasi nagsasalita na e" ah ok..tinanong ko ba?  ::)  im not so praning when it comes to developmental milestones, these are just guidelines, kahit di ma-meet lahat ng anak ko at a certain age, he does naman tasks ng 3-4 months older than his age.
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peach

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #27 on: September 01, 2010, 02:23:34 pm »

sa baby ko rin nangyari yung pagcompare ng lola niya sa baby ng sis ko at baby ko, 7mos., naman ang pagitan nila, anyway, mabigat sa pakiramdam pero di ko na lang pinapansin mommy ko, basta focus na lang ako sa development ng bebe ko..
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DeeCee

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #28 on: September 01, 2010, 10:06:08 pm »

now he can sit unsupported, we hope that Lola can appreciate how strong his apo is and see that his cousins who were born a month ahead still can't do that.

kudos to your baby mommy xhingpie!  :D
 
 
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xhingpie

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Re: How to deal with people who always compare your baby with other babies?
« Reply #29 on: September 02, 2010, 08:47:05 am »

Thanks Mommy Duna =D
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