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Author Topic: On being nice to maids and yaya  (Read 11426 times)

babywaby

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On being nice to maids and yaya
« on: August 31, 2010, 10:31:47 pm »

one thing i have learned from 14 maids/yaya, they are not worthy of my efforts on being extra nice, because all of them, when they want to leave, they will tell all lies and forget about how i treated them so well. they will not appreciate. so my advice is to forget about being extra nice to them. just do your obligation, pay them on time, feed them, give them enough time to rest, give them day off and thats it. no more ms. nice "ate". from now on ill be strict and firm with the house rules.

how about you momsies? am i right in saying this?
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mommy e

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #1 on: August 31, 2010, 10:39:37 pm »

we have the same experience sis .... just be yourself lang siguro, don't do extra extra para di nakaka disappoint ... ganun talaga mga maids eh .. pag aalis, kung ano ano reason, kaya ako nga .. never ako nagpigil ng yaya na aalis kc i know na kahit pigilan mo sila if me plano na talaga silang iba, aalis pa din un ... yung iba nga aalis pa lang ng probinsya, me plano na so kadalasan... babawiin lang pinamasahe nila aalis na ... way lang nila para makaluwas .. haayyyy
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babywaby

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #2 on: August 31, 2010, 10:48:14 pm »

before kasi super nice ako as in they can talk to me like im just their friend. even if may makita kong mali sa work nila diko agad pinapansin. if they need money pinabale ko, day off overnight, they can eat anything they want kahit ilang beses, they can watch dvd basta tapos na work, kasama pa sila sa mga family outings, hindi ko sila pinapagalitan kasi pinakikisamahan ko nga sila ng mabuti. i always end up taken advantaged and frustrated kasi akala ko by doing all that they will be considerate and concerned....but they are all just...ayoko na magsalita ng masama. basta no more nicey, nicey "ate"
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mommy_of_2

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #3 on: September 01, 2010, 07:38:03 am »

naku mommy babywaby, pareho tayong super nice sa mga yaya as in ang turing na namin sa kanya di na iba. Although tumagal siya sa amin ng 4 years after that parang nagiiba na behavior niya, alam mo na parang nagiging abusive na din siya sa work, wala siyang nakakasundo sa mga new yaya's na makakasama niya, at first we try to let it pass pero when the time comes na dumating na talaga sa sukdulan we had to let her go, although sad kasi we we're really used to have her na kaya nahirapan din kami magadjust ng mawala siya. Sadly its time for us to let her go, I've learned my lesson too medyo didistansya na ko ng konti sometimes kasi its turning into a disadvantage na din kung you tend to be "nice"..
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Mommy France

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #4 on: September 01, 2010, 08:22:15 am »

I try to maintain boundaries sa mga kasama sa house. I also do not expect much na rin kaya nga talagang in-assess ko yung yaya sa personality niya at kung ano lang yung kaya niyang i-offer.

When they see you complacent sa kanila xiempre pati sila magiging complacent din.

Naiintindihan ko rin kayo. Of course saying 'not being too nice' doesn't necessarily mean na masama na tayo sa kanila.

Employers pa rin nila tayo eh. Kaya nga mas maganda kung hindi kamag-anak or distant relative ang yaya.
« Last Edit: September 06, 2011, 10:34:21 am by Mommy France »
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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #5 on: September 01, 2010, 08:31:03 am »

I super agree with all of you mommies. Mashado rin kc akong nice sa mga past yaya namin eh. So sila ang tendency is feeling super close na rin to the point nha may mga things na ginagawa nila without asking for permission coz alam nila na pagbbigyan ko rin sila in the end. You put all your trust sa kanila and then pag naisipan nilang umalis ang dami dami nilang sasabihin na reasons para makaalis. Sana lang totoo yung mga sinasabi nila para hindi naman sila makarma in the end di ba.

Yan din ang sinabi ko kay hubby eh. No more Ms. Nice Ate na ang drama ko ngaun. Kahit na mas bata ako sa yaya namin. If she can't live with my new way of running our household, she's free to leave.
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dedski

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #6 on: September 01, 2010, 01:35:13 pm »

i'm not expecting na may nagtatagal pang maids ngayon. ang pinakamatagal kong yaya was during my time pa, elementary til college nasa amin sya but she was an "old maid". i guess they have reasons why they leave kahit gaano ka pa kabait sa kanila. they need to earn and maybe they want to look for another amo na mas malaki pasweldo or mas konti ang load or whatever. lahat naman siguro ng tao gusto umasenso, and we cant expect them to be forever maids nalang.

we have new set of yaya and maids, so new rules narin dahil i learned from experience sa former maids and yaya. magiging mabait parin ako sa kanila pero i'd be firm.
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babywaby

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #7 on: September 01, 2010, 02:07:26 pm »

one of our former maids pinag aral ko pa ng basic computer, i taught her to use internet and to chat so she can find a foreigner who can marry her--and she did. i was happy for her. umasenso sya but not for long. imagine she has 15k monthly allowance from the german, the poor guy shops for all her baby's needs pa and she can shop for herself din anytime. pag dumadalaw sya lagi syang may dala sa amin kasi she was so grateful to me. pero likas ang pagka inggrata niya, she left the foreigner for a younger pinoy and is now working in quatar. gold digger sya. umalis sya samin leaving the laundry undone when she said its finished na. if my maid has potential, i help them with their goals coz i dont want them to die as a housemaid. pero yun nga, sad thing about them, makitid talaga ang isip nila. they dont appreciate and consider.
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dedski

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #8 on: September 01, 2010, 02:26:36 pm »

true, meron inggrata >:( pero wala naman patutunguhan ang mga ganun tao. tulungan mo, maging mabait ka, eventually meron at meron parin masasabing masama sayo, itsi-chismis ka pa kahit di totoo ::)
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mommyjanice

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #9 on: September 01, 2010, 03:02:31 pm »

As of my POV naman, Ala naman sigurong masama kung maging mabait pa rin tayo sa mga susunod na helpers natin..

There will be a time na rerewardan rin tayo ni GOd at bibigayn pa rin tayo ng ating dream "yaya" at "helpers".

ang kasalanan ni Juan, di kasalanan ni Pedro.Bawat tao, may kanya kanyang ugali talaga mapahelper lang sya o mapamanager ng bangko..

Naging mabuti at mabait ako  sa lahat ng naging yaya ng baby ko..Kasi lagi kong iniisip na pano kaya kung naging yaya lang din ako samantalang may mga sarili sialng anak na dapat alagaan at pagsilbihan..kung tayo ang nasa katayuan nila,Ang sakit di ba.. Kahit sinasahuran lang natin sila, syempre,tao pa rin sila.


My mother is also a yaya sa ibang bansa. kaya nasasaktan talaga ako pag may mga negative akong naririnig sa mga yaya.Oo andun na tayo..Kaya lang, tayo ang nakakaisip kung ano ang tama at mali...sana kung gano tayo kabait sa mga nauna nating yaya, ganun pa rin sa susunod.


Di ba nga sabi ng Panginoon,kung anong ginagawa mo sa kapwa mo,yun din ang ginagawa mo sa akin..


Peace mga mommy. POV ko lang po ito...
« Last Edit: September 01, 2010, 03:08:50 pm by mommyjanice »
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meryl

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #10 on: October 17, 2010, 06:39:25 am »

i totally agree. even if you show genuine kindness to them, they will all be the same at the end of the day. they will not give you back the concern you extend to them. coz at the end of the day, you're just another "amo" whom she can find replacement for any time she wishes to. all i can say is, they can look for as many new "amos" they like, but they will find it hard to find good ones too. so it's up to them to keep you and do good to you in return or otherwise.
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❤Xian&Mam ❤

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #11 on: October 20, 2010, 02:34:01 am »

napag isipisip naman ako sa mga sinabi nyo mommies,
kami kasi sobrang bait sa maids e,
yung tipong parang kapatid o pamilya talaga namin sila.
pag umuwe pinas,pinagsshoping pa nga namin yun,
lahat ng gusto niya damit,undies,shorts,shoes etc.
libre yun walang bayad.
kung ano food namin yun din sa kanya,kasabay pa namin kumain.
yung pamasahe niya from iloilo,di din namin pinabayaran.
tapos bago kami umails ng pinas,binibigyan pa namin ng
pera yun parang bunos niya,ganun...
sabia pa nga namin kung mag aral sya,
sabay na niya habang nasa work sya,kasi pwede
namin sya tulungan sa mga kailangan niya.
hayyy...sana kahit panu maisip niya yun
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kandie

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #12 on: August 03, 2011, 10:10:05 pm »

iilan na lang yng mga yaya/maid na ganun na mrunong mgicip,my niece yaya, we have been nice to her ever since pero ang kapalit yn pgiging malaki ang ulo,atska matigas ang ulo kaya di na nila iicpn yng mabait tyo sa knla yng gus2 na nlang gawn yn na ang ggawin nla.
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mariann

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #13 on: August 29, 2011, 02:05:20 pm »

i believe no matter how good a yaya/helper is, we should still have that barrier between employers and workers in order to maintain the respect and privacy of each one.
 
i'm not super strict with my yayas/helpers nowadays as long as they're doing what being told them to do.  we also provide benefits and sometimes even give them allowance when going to the malls with us.
 
but work is work.  there is no niceness when work is not done properly.  i'm just fortunate my current helpers are taking note of that.
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rianne_mallows

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Re: On being nice to maids and yaya
« Reply #14 on: August 29, 2011, 02:52:52 pm »

we as a family are generally nice to maids.. almost all of those we kept for years only left us because of a better life or marriage..  though its true that they'll leave you at will even though  you' ve been the nicest "ate"..  being nice to house-helps did favor us in the long run

1. our best maids have been referred by previous maids as well.. because we were nice, they refer nice people too.. and even before the maid sees us, may good vibes na agad because of the kwentos of our former maid.. alam niya hindi dehado maids sa house main

2. none has left us hanging.. they'll tell us in advance once they want to leave na... and even stayed longer than they planned because we couldn't find a replacement yet.. sometimes, they'll be the one who'll look for replacement pa for us then train the replacement before they leave..  less work and stress for my mom..

till now, mom still has contacts of our previous maids and we call them if we need replacements..
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hindi naman ako masamang tao...
sadyang kapag nagsasabi ako ng totoo..
tinatamaan at tumatagos sa pagkatao mo
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