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Author Topic: Discussing SexEd with your teen.  (Read 10205 times)

mixx

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Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« on: February 20, 2011, 10:31:39 pm »

Hi moms (and dads), I would like to ask you your techniques or probably techniques on discussing SexEd with your teen son / daughter. (or in the future , i say) . Actually kasi, since i am a teen mom, i myself have difficulty on talking to my parents about sex ed. First, because they always put religion aside. Though Filipinos tayo and very religious and conservative, parang for me nagiging close minded na kami about Sex Education in our household. Laging belief is abstinence, or wag pagusapan kasi bastos, or if they consent me into using contraceptives they think they also give consent on sex, or some reasons na ikamamatay ko daw ang pills or other methods and so on.
Medyo i am having a hard time to be open to my parents about this. You yourselves are parents, how do you think should i start discussing it with them even if they are the ones refraining to talk about it with me? I know i deserve to be talked to as an adult already, im turning 20 in a month, and i have a daughter too.
Can you guys help me out? 

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« Last Edit: August 24, 2018, 11:58:49 pm by Mommy Jazz »
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yangyang08

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #1 on: April 24, 2011, 05:12:04 pm »

Practice mo lang yung anak mo to communicate with you more frequently.Yung 16 year old daughter ko everything under the sun pinag uusapan namin.I told her wag na wag syang uuwing buntis,if she cant control herself ,magpills sya.Yes! I told her that para malaman nyang Im very much open when it comes to that kind of topic.Pinaattend ko pa nga sya ng seminar para hindi magmukhang ignorante.Mas mabuting sa mga parents malaman ng anak ang tungkol sa sex rather sa iba.Kasi magiging iba interpretations nila pag sa iba natutunan! ;)
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toughmom moderator

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #2 on: May 31, 2011, 02:18:41 am »

According to the Law: Sexual Harassment in School

Find out what your legal options are in case you suspect your child has been a victim of sexual harassment.

http://www.smartparenting.com.ph/home-living/homebase/according-to-the-law-sexual-harassment-in-school
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toughmom moderator

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #3 on: August 31, 2011, 06:22:37 am »

Boys Reach Sexual Maturity at a Younger Age, says Study
Testosterone levels of boys suddenly peak, making them more likely to exhibit signs of machismo and recklessness and thereby upping their death rate.

read more by clicking image below

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Bry♥Shey

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #4 on: September 22, 2011, 12:40:50 am »

its better to educate them at a very young stage. especially sa mga daughters po natin. kasi sila itong may "mawawalan" mahirap na dahil maraming mapupusok na mga bata ngayon.

one time nagbabantay ako ng shop namin. nagulat ako nung nahuli ko yung isang batang lalake na nanonood ng porn. siguro mga 5 or 6 years old ito.. saw it kasi rinemote ko yung pc niya. so kita ko kung ano ginagawa niya.. tsk tsk

another experience ay mga batang babae naman siguro ages 10 to 14 ata ito.. i was cleaning the programts and documents that were installed by clients.. one time, pag bukas ko ng my documents lumantad sakin ang "Private Pictures" ng mga batang ito! and sinave pa talaga nila sa public na computer. i deleted those pictures dahil baka makita pa ng ibang tao at ipagkalat ang mga pictures nila. if that ever happened im sure masisira at guguho mundo nila.. that day i made a rule na do not save pictures, files in any computers.

kaya mga moms/dads bantayan or sabihan kaagad natin ang mga anak natin about dito.. most especially if we felt like they are curious about it..
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kaijami

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #5 on: September 23, 2011, 08:03:34 am »

@mr. tan--tsktsk...nagulat ako dun bro..ang babata pa but they know already about porn. I'm getting scared now, I know it's still early for me to worry about my daughter because she's still a baby but I'm so paranoid kasi nowadays sobrang expose n mga bata sa sex and relationship. Now I'm thinking how to talk to my daughter if she ask me about "sex" and "relationship".
Share ko lang, last Wednesday I went to the mall with my mom. There was this elementary student holding hands with I think high school student. 
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kaijami

itsmenena

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #6 on: December 12, 2011, 02:19:19 pm »

Practice mo lang yung anak mo to communicate with you more frequently.Yung 16 year old daughter ko everything under the sun pinag uusapan namin.I told her wag na wag syang uuwing buntis,if she cant control herself ,magpills sya.Yes! I told her that para malaman nyang Im very much open when it comes to that kind of topic.Pinaattend ko pa nga sya ng seminar para hindi magmukhang ignorante.Mas mabuting sa mga parents malaman ng anak ang tungkol sa sex rather sa iba.Kasi magiging iba interpretations nila pag sa iba natutunan! ;)

i really agree with this advice sis :)
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Mommy Jazz

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #7 on: February 18, 2013, 05:21:14 pm »

I saw this book sa Fully Booked but I didn't buy it yet. I hope I can find answers to questions I should be prepared for once my girl reaches her teen, malapit na yon.
Pero I would disagree on teaching how to use contraceptives. Teaching this means I'll be allowing her to have premarital sex, even at an early age.
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J0

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #8 on: February 22, 2013, 11:24:44 am »

Hi,

I'm a Dad with just one child, a daughter who's now 10 years old.  I think the very first thing that a father or a mother must do...is to first parent the child within one's self.  Kailangan ayusin muna natin ang ating mga sarili dahil kahit tayo rin naman hindi naman naturuan ng maayos ng mga magulang natin.  How are we with our body?  Do we know it well enough?  Do we love ourselves, care about ourselves...our mind, our body, the very person that we are...our entire being? I personally believe that is only when we know ourselves, love ourselves enough that we can know and love another person.  Kung resolved ang personal issues natin about sexuality...then mas magiging effective tayo sa pagtuturo tungkol sa sexuality, relationships, marriage, sex, procreation to our child.

May interesting na school of thought ngayon about sexuality na magandang gamitin na springboard into teaching sexuality to teens...that we have been created by God with the passion and sexual intensity that is meant to be fully expressed later in life...when we meet that person whom we chose to unite ourselves with, our whole selves...body, mind, spirit.

You can research more on this, which is called "Freedom to Love: The Theology of the Body".  There are You Tube videos on this being taught by Christopher West (himself a husband and family man).

This is consistent in the concept that we have to properly undergo the stages of Psycho-Sexual Development (where we should pass through stages of recognizing and appreciating our body, being aware of our sexual self, fantasy...and where the last is integration...after marriage...when the full human psycho-social-sexual development comes into complete maturity.)

Ang problema, kung wala sa tamang lugar ang isang bagay tulad ng sex, na isang full body and mind experience...involving all of the senses...nagiging malaking problema later in life. 

Ako, in my own personal opinion...the only way that a person can have the fullest, most complete and satisfying experience of sex and all its intense sexual expressions...is when you engage it at last (after you have gathered all that sexual intensity for years)...with that one person whom you have married (a lifetime relationship as a result of long but very meaningful acquaintance, friendship, romance...).

"The body remembers" kaya dapat walang ibang memory when the time comes, after all the rites of passage through emotion and maturity and marital vows... to finally engage in that full expression of love and passion which is sex.

Mommy Jazz

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #9 on: February 22, 2013, 12:04:32 pm »

Hello Daddy Jojo !
I agree kaya I need to make a further study muna, not just from book but as you suggested, self analyzation din. The hard part would be about pre-marital sex.
I really think sensible insights like yours are  truly beneficial than those promoting birth control pills just to advertise their client's brand.
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J0

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #10 on: February 24, 2013, 05:46:58 am »

HI Mommyjazz
Thank you so much fo your appreciation.  Medyo nire-reflect ko these days kung paanong lahat na yata ng aspect ng life natin eh pinapasok ng consumerism...kahit ang pagdi-disscuss ng sex sa ating anak.

Naalala ko tuloy ang isang documentary video na napanood ko.

REMOTE CONTROL
Children, Media Consumption & the Changing American Family

The average American child spends over 40 hours per week consuming media, the equivalent of a full-time job. This means that by the time children born today turn 30, they will have spent an entire decade of their lives in front of some type of screen. Remote Control, based on the findings of the Kaiser Family Foundation's landmark study Generation M: Media in the Lives of 8 to 18-year-olds, examines the implications of this unprecedented level of exposure. Putting a human face on the report's statistical findings, filmmaker Bob McKinnon explores the media habits of two families, supplementing their powerful personal insights with testimony from media experts, educators, and policymakers. Remote Control offers a fascinating look at the centrality of media in our lives, revealing far-reaching effects that we are only beginning to understand, and suggesting ways we might begin to help our children live a life instead of watching one.
source: Media Education Foundation

Di ba kahit tayong parents na ngayon, malaki ang naging role sa atin ng media.  Kadalasan nga dito natin natututunan ang boy and girl relationships, premarital sex...instead of hearing these topics discussed by our parents.  So what's the next trend kaya?

Best Seller ngayon ang isang erotic novel that takes the reader into the world of Bondage, Discipline, Dominance/submission, and Sadomasochism (BDSM).  Isa daw sa maraming groups of readers nito ay mga teens.  So aside from sex, our teens are being brainwashed into thinking that it's okay to be abused and to give in to the perversions of sadists and maniacs.  Ano ito, our youth are being conditioned into becoming super consumers of sex products...which now includes, blindfolds, whips, handcuffs and torture "toys"?

We, as parents are the only ones qualified to teach about relationships, marriage, sex and procreation (in that specific order).  Kasi we will be communicating to our child motivated only by our love for them and nothing else. 

Mommy Jazz

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Re: Discussing SexEd with your teen.
« Reply #11 on: October 16, 2017, 11:46:01 pm »

We have to discuss key issues with them now when they're still eager to listen. Don't let Google school them on these important issues.
On Smart Parenting, here are 12 Things I Want to Tell My Child While I'm Still the Cool Mom
http://www.smartparenting.com.ph/parenting/tweens-teens/11-talks-you-should-have-with-your-soon-to-be-teens-a00041-20171014
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