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Author Topic: I don't have a "ME" time  (Read 13323 times)

mariann

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #15 on: February 04, 2012, 10:04:45 pm »

the moms here are right.  we all need a "me" time.  i make sure i have one despite being at work the whole day.  may it be reading a book, playing on my phone, or watching my favorite show on tv.  i de-stress first before heading home like reading the day's newspaper, dropping by a spa for a quick back massage or having my nails done (that is if i had more time).  that way, i'm ready to bond with my kids and hubby when i get home. 
 
indeed, it's really not an effective parenting when you're stressed out.  our household help are really not that efficient.  i'm a perfectionist, but when i became i mom, i've learned to allot some room for mistakes.
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Mommy France

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #16 on: February 05, 2012, 08:50:37 am »

^^ True...
I more impatient kapag stressed ako. May it be a quiet coffee time at home or umupo lang sa garahe or pray the rosary, nakakahinga ako ng maluwag after.
Iba lang siguro yung me time na hinahanap ni Che because she's at home.
Medyo nakakatulong siguro na hindi ko na gustuhin sa labas ang me time ko kasi I work.

Para di ka ma-guilty about wanting to go out alone, offer your husband a me time as well. :)
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I am not perfect but I try my best to make the most of what God gave me.
Bad things may happen to me, but I will always come out of it with my head up high. Why? Because I know that I did the things I can control the right way. And the things I can't control, I leave it up to God's will.

mami che

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #17 on: February 05, 2012, 09:34:12 pm »

Thanks for the yaya tips sis syndyela... i did prepare a "matrix" for their tasks & scheds na kaso kinahon naman nila sarili nila dun sa ginawa ko...  mahirap tlaga magturo sa mga hindi willing matuto  :-\ pero yun lang, mapagkakatiwalaan din kasi sila.. but yes, more patience to train  para pare-pareho kaming magbenefit  :)

Kapag magwowork ulit ako sis marian, ganyan din gusto ko... de-stress before going home  ;) mas energy mas happy...

@ mommy france, your right. ibang me time coz i seldom go out... naiinggit nga ko kay hubby coz he always have "me time"  kasi yung nature ng work niya, kasama lagi mga brods niya & mga partners... but start ako magprogram ng sked & tasks ko. uumpisahan ko na mga inadvice nyo mga mommies  ;)

MARAMING THANKS!!!  :D relieved...
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Mommy France

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #18 on: February 05, 2012, 09:39:01 pm »

^^woot-woot!
tapos sumama ka pag may EB. Kahit isama mo yung kids mo keri lang dahil marami ring mommies ang may dalang kids.
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I am not perfect but I try my best to make the most of what God gave me.
Bad things may happen to me, but I will always come out of it with my head up high. Why? Because I know that I did the things I can control the right way. And the things I can't control, I leave it up to God's will.

Anne Mercado

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #19 on: February 08, 2012, 07:20:47 pm »

Schedule play dates with your other friends.. wherein you can leave your kids and yayas.

You may also leave your kids with their grandparents even for just a few hours so you can meet up with your friend.

Hope this helps!
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mami che

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #20 on: February 08, 2012, 11:38:23 pm »

@ mommy france, EB with kids sounds great  :) thanks talaga for the positive notes  :)

@ sis anne, yes will do... and it should be sooooooon!!! Kasi kabisado ko na kung saang sulok ng kwarto namin unang magkakaalikabok  e ;D bad signal na yun hehe  ::) thanks!
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swtgrl_bee

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #21 on: February 11, 2012, 10:57:55 pm »

Before I don't have ME TIME,pero hindi siya healthy. Ngayon ME TIME ko sa labas once a week, nagpapawax ako ikot ikot sa mall, kung ano ano. Then every week ME TIME sa CR :D Hair spa, body scrub basta naliligo ako ng matagal.
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violet.crumble

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #22 on: February 12, 2012, 07:08:55 pm »

Super can relate!

I'm a SAHM to a 27-month old boy who's at the peak of his kakulitan so a lot of times i feel "trapped".  Don't get me wrong, i enjoy being a SAHM and experience the joy of seeing every milestone since his birth.  Lalo na ngayon, feeling mas kailangan ako ang nag-aalaga sa kanya since crucial and discipline and values formation at this stage.

Anyway, yun nga feeling ko wala akong ME time.  May maid ako to do the housework and my husband is hands-on naman when he's at home.  Kaya lang ayaw talaga ako payagan ng baby ko to leave.  Ayaw ko kasi yung tinatakasan yung bata.  Mas nai-intensify yung separation anxiety nila pag ganun.  So i make it a point na magpapa-alam ako.  except lang when i go to the market since tulog pa sya when i leave.  Pag ganun, we make sure na yung husband ko, nandun para pag-gising niya, di man ako, at least yung husband ko ang makita niya.  Pero sabi nung husband ko, matagal na iyak pa din before he calms down.

Ang idea ko lang naman ng ME time is go to the salon, have a long-awaited and much-deserved foot spa with massage, mani and pedi and hair treatment.  Bonus na kung makapagpa-rebond or full-body massage.  Super luxury na kung makapag-coffee for kahit 2 hours with my bestfriend.  Yun yung wish ko talaga.  Sabi ko nga kay hubby, gusto ko ng day-off.  Yung tipong buong araw di ko sila kailangan isipin and just enjoy myself.  Hay kelan kaya?

Dati we tried na as a family, punta kami sa mall tapos pa-haircut  ako while hawak sya ng husband ko.  Sandali pa lang umiiyak na kasi ayaw niya na hinahawakan ako nung stylist.  I dunno if it's because guy yung stylist.  So sabi namin ni hubby, baka better if iwan ko sila sa house habang naglalaro or nagsi-swim while i go out.  This weekend i tried it.  I asked my son if i can go to the "barber"  (barber kasi ang alam niya since yun yung nag-gugupit sa kanya).  Nung una sabi niya yes kasi busy silang mag-ama na nagba-bike.  Nung napansin niya na paalis ako biglang no-no na daw!  So we tried na libangin muna with something fun to do tapos nagpaalam ako ulit.  Ayaw talaga.  My hubby suggested na pa-home service na lang ako.  Haven't tried it pero i think baka di rin okay kasi for sure kapit-tuko sakin si baby habang nagpapa-footspa ako. Saka it defeats the purpose.  Gusto ko nga kumawala sa bahay e tapos magpapa-home service ako.  Waaaahhh!

Dapat ba takas na lang ako and wag na magpaalam?  Nasa separation anxiety stage kasi sya and ayokong magdevelop sya ng negative feelings about someone leaving or being left behind.

I really need a day off.  Feeling ko din kasi mas masungit ako pag di ako nakakapag-me time saka mas impatient ako.

Any ideas?  Thanks!
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ea_brea

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #23 on: February 16, 2012, 09:49:38 am »

sis, you have to make your son understand that mommy has to go somewhere to do something. hindi naman pwede na clingy forever ang anak nyo. he has to learn how to be independent also or be with other people. he has to know that there are times that mommy has to do something na wala siya or he can't be there. you have to be firm or else your child will learn that he can control you by just crying.

sa totoo lang ayoko sinasama anak ko sa salon kasi ang daming chemicals dun, amoy pa lang masakit na sa ilong. so pag nagpapagupit ako sa mall, maglilibot sila ng husband ko, arcade or pupunta sa toy/book store para malibang anak ko.

momma_33

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #24 on: February 16, 2012, 11:08:42 am »

this is exactly what I am feeling right now, No "ME" time. Napakahirap ng ganitong sitwasyon. My self esteem is so low dahil nito, ni pag aayos sa sarili wala akong time mga sis. Lalong lalo na sa umaga, ang mga working moms busying busy mgpapaganda sa sarili, wala ako nyan. Every second are for my kids, attend to their needs, dress up my eldest, bath my bunso at kung ano ano pa sa umaga before I'll leave the house, making me no time for myself grbae talaga mga sis. pgkabihis ko diretso labas na ng bahay pra ihatid ang eldest ko sa school before heading to my office. Ako pa ngddrive nyan, grabe talaga schedule ko, ngarag ko lge. Bonus nalang kung meron pa time before mag 8am pagdating ko sa carpark at mkapag ayos man lang ng sarili bago mag time in sa office. Napaka hirap.
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chester

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #25 on: February 16, 2012, 11:37:13 am »

Madalang lang akong magkaroon ng ME time. it's my choice and nag eenjoy din din naman ako.  yung ME time ko lang pag may nagyaya na kung nasa mood pa ako na lumabas.   Minsan sinasama ko pa hubby ko sa lakad namin.  kung nandito ako sa Manila work-bahay lang ako. mas nag eenjoy ako na kasama hubby ko sa paglabas (eventhough nag aaway kami pagnagmamall kasi wala naman siyang tiyagaan sa window shopping  ;D). at pag uwi sa province, gusto ko laging kasama ang baby ko sa lahat ng lakad. kahit pagpunta ng bank eh gusto ko kasama si baby. kung may bibilhin ako sa grocery kahit sandali lang eh kasama din siya.  ;D.
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violet.crumble

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #26 on: February 16, 2012, 11:38:22 am »

@sis ea_brea

sis, you have to make your son understand that mommy has to go somewhere to do something. hindi naman pwede na clingy forever ang anak nyo. he has to learn how to be independent also or be with other people. he has to know that there are times that mommy has to do something na wala siya or he can't be there. you have to be firm or else your child will learn that he can control you by just crying.

thanks for this sis.  i guess alam naman natin to, sometimes siguro we need a fresh perspective on things.  Mahirap din kasi pag may pressure to be SuperMom that sometimes we forget ourselves, which is not good din naman.

@ sis momma_33 - hang in there sis.  ako din dumating sa point na ganyan.  feeling ko ang pangit-pangit ko na.  lalo since i just stay at home so madalas dati naka pambahay lang ako and nakatali lang buhok.  what i did was to make a conscious effort to fix myself para naman di ko feeling na losyang ako.  How old are your kids ba?  Can they take care of getting themselves ready for school by themselves?  Option ba to wake up a bit earlier para naman you have time to get yourself ready din?  Pag weekend, baka may chance na ikaw naman ang i-pamper?   Little things help.   ;)
« Last Edit: September 27, 2012, 11:36:55 am by Mommyjazz »
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momma_33

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #27 on: February 16, 2012, 11:51:28 am »

@tyger1112: thanks for the reply sis, i appreciate it so much, it seems like having a friend who is there to listen. My eldest is already 10yrs old sis kaya lang napamper ko siya ng sobra kaya lagi pa rin nkadepende sakin sis. My bunso is 7 mo old pa lang kaya talagang alagain pa, Im taking care of her sis habang nsa bahay pa ako kase sa yaya nalang lge the whole day.

Ewan ko sis bka post partum blues ba ito or whatever it is, i feel so losyang talaga. I planned of going to the salon this saturday to get my hair done, paparestyle ko hair ko ng medyo maikli for me to get a litlle younger look. I'll try to get my old self again at sana ma attain ko on. Dati kase sis sobrang vain ako not until nabuntis at nanganak ako sa bunso ko, everything has changed na talaga especially having a "me" time.
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violet.crumble

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #28 on: February 16, 2012, 03:20:31 pm »

@momma_33 - super gets ko how you feel.  Yung tipong you want time for yourself so much pero nagi-guilty kang iwan yung anak mo lalo if sa yaya na the whole day.  Ako naman, sa akin yung anak ko 24/7, pero nagi-guilty pa din ako sa thought na iiwanan ko sya to pamper myself.  But i guess we have to remind ourselves na setting aside time for us, na sa atin lang talga is a way to be a better mom to our kids. 

Just wanna share what i did... Last night pag-uwi ni hubby, i surprised him with massage.  Lagi kasi syang pagod after work.  Halos everyday, nagpapa-apak ng back and nagpapa-massage ng likod.  So last night, even without him asking, i gave him a massage, with lotion pa and kasama arms and legs.  Sabi niya, "wow, sarap naman ng pamper ng misis ko.  Sabi ko, "Talaga?  Sa weekend ako naman ha?" :)  So parang ni-reserve ko na yung weekend na ako naman ang magpapa-pamper.  Hope to be able to go for massage sa The Spa or hair treatment and footspa sa salon.  Keeping my fingers crossed! :)
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caitlin's MoMmY

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Re: I don't have a "ME" time
« Reply #29 on: February 16, 2012, 09:57:04 pm »

Hi mga sisses sa totoo lang is din ako sa mga mommy na nahihirapan iwan ang baby sa akin naman kasi walang pag iiwanan ang MIL ko naku suuper aalagaan ang dogs nil kesa sa anak ko ang lola ko naman na kasama ko dito hindi naman na niya kaya mag alaga ng bata kahit 68 palang sya wala ng patience so ginagawa ko para magka "me time" ako  everytime tulog si baby yun ang me time ko sa tanghali nag nap sya thats my time para asikasuhin sarili ko dun ako naliligo para i can have my time..,sa gabi naman 9pm sleep na sya so kapag tulog na i can do everything like watching dvd alone or mag SP nakakawala ng stress kapag you know someone is always there para help ka sa problems mo without going out with frends kasi sa mga sisses lang natin here sa SP nakakahingi ka na ng tulong and advices..,also nag FB din ako and isa sa pinaka like ko gawin is watching youtube videos like pinay guru's nakakaaliw talaga..,
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