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Author Topic: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM  (Read 4980 times)

syndyela

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Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« on: March 08, 2012, 07:08:51 pm »

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Stay at Home Moms and Work at Home Moms, share naman po your experiences on this:

How do you deal with your parents and relatives (or partners na rin) who does not approve of your current status as SAHM or WAHM.  Yung mga relatives na tipong mas prefer nila or mas nire-respect ka nila pag nagwo-work ka sa isang corporate company?  Or are your parents and relatives and husbands supportive of your current career status as SAHM or WAHM?

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« Last Edit: January 12, 2020, 10:01:29 pm by Parentchat Admin »
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mommy_geli

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #1 on: March 08, 2012, 07:17:55 pm »

i usually encounter this. last week we went to my lola's house and almost lahat ng cousins ko eh tinatanong kung ano work ko. even yung hubby ng tita ko. i tell them na my hubby doesnt want me to work. and dahil sa laki ng weight gain ko sinasabi naman nila na sobrang busog naman daw ako sa pagmamahal ng asawa ko. i just tell them na wala akong makuhang matinong yaya. which is true and medyo complicated pagnagwork ako. lalo na at 2 lang kami ng anak ko sa bahay dahil sa ofw si hubby. sinasabi ko sa kanila straightforward that my hubby can give me and my son a comfortable life and nakakasave pa rin naman kami. medyo naghihinayang nga sila dahil sa license ko.

my husband allows me to work naman if i want. pero naaawa lang ako sa son ko kung sa yaya lang maiiwan.

imeego

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #2 on: March 08, 2012, 11:08:10 pm »

share ko lang...i always receive text messages from my father making kulit na mag-work na ako  ulit, kesyo sayang daw profession ko, then kanina he said tulungan ko na daw husband ko...dati di ko na lang nirereplayan pero kanina medyo bad mood ako so nasagot ko ng di maganda...kakainis lang kasi im old enough naman na to know what is good for me and my family..mother ko naman is supportive of my decision not to work muna and take care of my baby specially when she witnessed yung kalikutan ni baby,  and yun din gusto ni hubby...i think there is nothing wrong with being a sahm as long as the husband can provide for the family,,,we live a comfortable life so i believe there is no need for me to leave my son under the care of his yaya, for me ibang tao pa din kasi ang yaya kahit pa sabihing mabait yan, iba pa din ang alaga ng magulang...my mother fully understands this, pero ewan ko ba sa father ko pero keber na lang, dedma na lang ako...sa sinasabi ni father na sayang daw  tinapos ko, i don't think so kasi di naman nawala eh and i can go back to work anytime i want (if baby is old enough)..sayang for me is the time na dapat spend ko with my baby, yun kasi di na pwede ibalik eh...as for my other relatives, i dont really mind them although wala pa naman ako narinig na negative reaction from them since wala namang napeperwisyo sa kanila sa pagiging sahm ko no :P
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mommy_geli

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #3 on: March 09, 2012, 11:48:33 am »

yun nga yung nakakainis mga sis eh. kung hindi naman issue sa mag asawa kung SAHM ka, bat si nakikialam. kesyo sayang daw yung pinag arala and yung mga opportunities. pero naisip ko kaya bang tapatan ng perang kikitain ko yung time na spent ko with my son? lumaki ako ng OFW ang father ko. so i know yung feeling ng son ko ngaun. and it makes me realize na kung hindi siguro SAHM ang mom ko maybe hindi ako nakapagtapos ng pag aaral ko. and maybe napariwara ako. si mama ko ang tumayong gabay sakin sa paglaki kahit na minsan lang umuwi si papa. and kahit na absentee father ang papa ko. lumaki kami ng may respect sa kanya at hindi lang basta takot. kung magwowork ako sinong magpapaliwanag sa anak ko ng mga bagay bagay? i tried to work again almost 2yrs ago kaya lang ang problema may provincial site. and hindi siya nagwork out. lalo na sa field ko na hindi naman pwedeng sa office lang ako. i just hope na maintindihan nila na hindi biro maging SAHM. not because i dont work it means wala na akong silbi.  and iniisip ko din na panu kung bakasyon si hubby edi konting time na lang nga bakasyon ni hubby tapos hindi pa kami magkasama 24/7. maybe sa ibang tao katamaran lang ang pagiging SAHM but for me its a sacrifice that im willing to give para sa anak ko.

avengeus22

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #4 on: March 09, 2012, 09:56:05 pm »

@Sis emz :D c

i totally agree with you sis. But to be better off let's just
smile graciously,hold our heads up high and be happy.
Whether they admit it or not,there is a tinge of jealousy behind
their criticisms and judgment. Most of the time,they wouldn't really
know how it is coz they've never experienced what and how we go
through this path of life that we SAHM/WAHMs chose..
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"Love let me live Life as it should be..."

syndyela

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #5 on: March 10, 2012, 10:59:12 am »

I'm currently working pero I would have wanted to work at home nalang sana.  Pero just last week kasi, nung nagka-chikahan kami ng mommy ko, narinig ko from her mga panlalait niya sa mga tita ko (bale kapatid ng daddy ko) na mga stay at home moms.  Kesyo pinag-aral daw sila ng daddy ko tapos hindi naman nagtrabaho.  Nilalait din niya yung mga trainees niya (kinuha kasi siyang trainer ng skills program ng isang bayan), may mga nagtapos daw dun ng college pero hindi daw nakahanap ng trabaho kaya ayun, nagte-take nalang ng skills program.  Naiinis ako sa kanya kasi kung makalait siya ng mga SAHMs at saka mga WAHMs, parang hindi siya naging Stay At Home Mom...e her whole mommy life naging SAHM siya...ngayon lang siya nag-work,project based pa.

Nung binaggit ko sa kanya na balak ko magtake ng soap making training program para magbenta nalang ako ng sariling soaps ko and magtayo ng sariling business, ang sabi niya sa akin, "naku, akala mo madali lang gumawa nun? Mahirap yun!".  Lam mu yun, imbes na suportahan ako sa interests ko, ganun pa ang ico-comment niya. Sabi ko sa kanya, "kaya nga aatend ng training e para turuan.  Di ba ganun naman ginagawa mo, nagtuturo ka sa iba para matuto sila and magamit nila yung tinuro mo para pagkakitaan nila."  Di nalang siya umimik.

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sweetprincess

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #6 on: March 16, 2012, 04:26:08 pm »

mga sis,
 ngayon lang na brought up n naman issue ng pagtigil ko sa work, 2 yrs na ako nag stop and dto kami nktira ng husband ko sa parents ko, and mismo nanay ko yung nagagalit na nakinig ako sa asawa ko na mag resyn, bkt? hindi daw ba niya kaya alagaan mga anak ko, wala daw ba kami tiwala sa pag alaga niya? dti p daw sakitin na talaga anak ko, hay hirap ng ganito, ofw un husband ko and lhat naman ng need sa bahay tumutulong kami, kung di man ako makapag abot ng minsan request nila na for personal madamot na ba ako? tinitipid ko din yung budget and pinagkkasya; ang sakit sa dibdib  na dahil tumigil daw ako mag work, kanino sila hihingi? kung meron naman sobra mgbbigay naman ako, kco ngayon medyo sakto un budget kc katapos namin nagpabinyag sa province and nag recover ng expenses namin c hubby; very supportive naman husband ko kung ano mga needs dto sa bahay i-provide namin, lalo na sa food and payables, nakakalungkot lang na di ka mkbigay punong puno ng sumbat, maga na ang mata ko kakaiyak, :(, para na akong mamatay sa salita palang..
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mamapeew

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #7 on: April 12, 2012, 08:43:40 am »

I can feel all your sentiments mga mommies.

When I got pregnant, my husband and I decided that I should quit my job and take care of our first baby. I was so glad to take the break (after working since I graduated college) but after a while, i began missing being able to go to work everyday. I didn't want to leave my baby to a yaya but I also want to help my hubby with our expenses so I was torn. My mom had me enrolled again to take up educ classes so I can teach (and pursue my dreams) tsaka ayaw niya rin kasi akong natetengga sa bahay. I finished 18 units, passed the boards, I was ready to apply for work this year because my daughter is 3.5 and is about to enter school BUT my mom passed away  :'( and now, di na ako makapag apply for work. Parang all the circumstances led me to stay at home. My lola who is turning 100 is staying with me (mom ko dati nagaalaga sa kanya), I'm taking care of my daughter plus I took over my mom's apartment. Also, we're planning to have another baby.

I promised my mom that I will work again. Lagi niya sinasabi na kailangan may sarili rin akong pera at hindi umaasa sa asawa pero with all of these on my shoulders... paano na?  :(
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sangolko

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Re: Dealing with relatives on being SAHM and WAHM
« Reply #8 on: November 29, 2012, 03:04:43 pm »

I'm SAHM also taking care of my 4 mos old baby. Nagresign ako last year 3 mos after i came to know that I'm pregnant to avoid stress of course it was a mutual decision. Masaya na malungkot kc I used to work and earned my own money but now nakasanayan ko na din sa house. Yung mga relatives ko though my mga side comment sila about me being SAHM I don't care hindi ko pinapansin deadma kung baga kc katuwiran ko hindi naman kami humihingi sa inyo eh bakit ako papaapekto. Kesyo sayang daw ang pinagaralan, sayang license, etc etc.
Meron namang time my narinig ako patutsada though hindi naman ako ang topic syempre medyo nag up tenga ko  "tamad daw" huh pasok sa tenga labas sa kabila. Sobrang tough ang maging SAHM yan ang hindi alam ng mga relatives at ng mga mapanghusgang tao. Kaya ako heads up lagi pag tanong ano work ko "I'm proud being a mom and full time housewife" :)
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