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Author Topic: My baby was shaken by his dad out of frustration, mga moms,Pano po ba...  (Read 6196 times)

mommycakes

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Hi mga mommies!

Eto po nangyari, Nai-shake ng husband ko ang 6 month-old baby namin out of his frustration dahil hindi tumitigil yung baby namin sa kaiiyak. Hindi ko nagustuhan ginawa niya dahil ngayon nga lang ulit sila nagkasama after several months dahil sa work niya. 3days pa lang siya dito nung ginwa niya yun. Hindi ko nga siya inimik after nun kasi naawa ako sa baby ko, pero hindi ko sinabi na nagalit ako di ko rin pnakita na inis ako, basta tahimik lang ang peg.

Pano ba i-handle yung ganito? salamat sa inyo.
« Last Edit: November 22, 2012, 03:51:15 am by Errych »
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CallcenterMom

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Re: MY BABY WAS SHAKEN BY HIS DAD OUT OF FRUSTRATION, MGA MOMS,PANO PO BA...
« Reply #1 on: November 21, 2012, 10:24:22 am »

Naku, paanong shake?  Minsan kasi di ba nakakasama un sa baby?
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KVsmommy

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Re: MY BABY WAS SHAKEN BY HIS DAD OUT OF FRUSTRATION, MGA MOMS,PANO PO BA...
« Reply #2 on: November 21, 2012, 10:36:03 am »

sis mommycakes: you should talk to hubby about it. mahirap yung laging tahimik treatment ang sagot natin sa issues... para ma-avoid yung possibility na maulit (it's not good for baby), ask him why he did that and explain to him na crying marathons are really part of daily life with a baby...

baka kasi wala naman kids where he works, so hindi sya sanay sa iyakan moments, baka natutuliro sa ingay or something. best if he realizes that shaking the baby like that will hurt your child. saka mahirap na baka maulit, he might be able to do something worse... you never know.

eloytski

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Re: MY BABY WAS SHAKEN BY HIS DAD OUT OF FRUSTRATION, MGA MOMS,PANO PO BA...
« Reply #3 on: November 21, 2012, 12:10:41 pm »

Sorry to hear about that, sis mommycakes. Pero sana sabihin mo din sa hubby mo yung reason, para maintindihan niya na hindi tama yung ginawa niya. Kasi baka akalain niya okay lang yun...kawawa naman si baby. Saka baka sa halip na mag-bonding yung family nyo habang naka-bakasyon si hubby, e lalo ma-strain yung environment nyo.

Given na matagal-tagal pala na malayo sa inyo ni baby si hubby, baka nga nanibago sya o maybe he was looking for some quiet time with the family. Still, that is not an excuse for hurting a baby! Dapat alam naman niya na natural sa babies ang umiiyak, nag-iingay (even first-time dad should know and expect that).

You should stand up for the baby sis. And hopefully hindi na ito maulit.

God bless!
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luk_resha

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Re: MY BABY WAS SHAKEN BY HIS DAD OUT OF FRUSTRATION, MGA MOMS,PANO PO BA...
« Reply #4 on: November 21, 2012, 01:01:57 pm »

naku sis sana huwag ng maulit... have you heard of shaken baby syndrome? Shaken baby syndrome can occur from as little as 5 seconds of shaking, even if we dont intend to harm the baby still my effect yun sa bata lalo na at hindi pa ganon ka-develop ang systems nila, i dont want to frighten you pero your husband should understand that it can cause injuries sa anak nyo... perhaps you can google it then let hubby read it para maging aware siya mahirap tumahimik pag tungkol sa kapakanan ng bata...
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sangolko

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Re: MY BABY WAS SHAKEN BY HIS DAD OUT OF FRUSTRATION, MGA MOMS,PANO PO BA...
« Reply #5 on: November 21, 2012, 02:17:09 pm »

naku hindi maganda yung nase shake ang baby kase yung ulo niya specially yung brain malambot pa. pls talk to your husband na bawal i-shake ang baby.  kelangan mo sya kausapin ng  maayos at explain ang mga do' s and dont's.  Explain mo din sa kanya na hindi iiyak ang baby if wala nararamdaman na masama sa katawan or uncomportable sya.      Sometimes mas nakakasama pa ang pagtahimik na lang at hindi pag discuss ng issue.  You can always use a soft voice sa pag-eexplain sa hubby mo. 
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xianne

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Re: MY BABY WAS SHAKEN BY HIS DAD OUT OF FRUSTRATION, MGA MOMS,PANO PO BA...
« Reply #6 on: November 21, 2012, 05:29:31 pm »

if sa akin ngyari un mga sis, baka inaway ko n ng bonnga c hubby. i dont care if kakauwi palang niya thats not a valid reason para hayaan ko siang gawin sa anak ko un.. buti un lang ang ginawa niya.. wala siang pasensya sa anak niya what if hindi lang un ang gawin niya? sorry pero para sakin hindi katangap tanggap un. knowing na wala namang muang yung baby!ikaw na lang siguro mag handle kay baby pag naiyak sia.
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amieh

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Re: My baby was shaken by his dad out of frustration, mga moms,Pano po ba...
« Reply #7 on: November 23, 2012, 01:00:16 pm »

same here sis!! baka maging single mom ako nun pag nagkataon!  ;D
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BlueAby

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Re: My baby was shaken by his dad out of frustration, mga moms,Pano po ba...
« Reply #8 on: November 27, 2012, 05:21:18 pm »

nagawa na yan ni hubby before. sobrang antok na kasi niya and gusto na rin niya makatulog yung anak ko kaya hinele niya ng malakas. Sinabi ko sa kanya na "Di ganyan ang tamang pagpatay sa anak mo" then follow up ako ng "alam mo na masama ang malakas na alog sa mga bata eh" si hubby todo deny pa na di daw malakas yung alog niya sa anak namin.

pero atleast never na niya inulit after ko magalit. hehe

Kasi may mga lalaki na mahina makiramdam. Kahit tumahimik tayo di nila malalaman ang dahilan or kung may nagawa ba silang mali. Mas maganda if sabihin mo sa hubby mo na di maganda ang ginawa niya. And dapat nga umiiyak talaga ang baby para ma-exercise ang heart nila. ;)
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mariann

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Re: My baby was shaken by his dad out of frustration, mga moms,Pano po ba...
« Reply #9 on: November 27, 2012, 07:26:19 pm »

You should talk to your hubby. If you're avoiding an argument, there are lots of ways in explaining to him that shaking your baby can cause internal injuries. It won't help if you just keep quiet about it.

It's understandable that men are not that patient enough to handle situations like that. So don't push him to bond with your baby when the latter is not in the mood.
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ahyzeyuh

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Re: My baby was shaken by his dad out of frustration, mga moms,Pano po ba...
« Reply #10 on: November 28, 2012, 06:29:24 am »

i agree sa lahat ng mga mommies- hindi dapat shake ang bata ng malakas..
 kung tahimik lang sis ang peg mo, that will not solve the problem. peru syempre wag din tataas ang boses. perhaps during your coffee time na hindi mainit ulo ng hubby mo, you can talk to him.

your hubby also need to understand that its normal for a kid to cry out loud and dapat shared responsibility ninyong mag-asawa yun na patahanin baby niyo.

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sweet&spice

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Re: My baby was shaken by his dad out of frustration, mga moms,Pano po ba...
« Reply #11 on: November 29, 2012, 10:09:14 am »

Tip: if a parent is short-fused with a noisy or crying baby, wag mo muna palapitin sa bata. Let the person cool down. Guilty ako sa temper outbusts when i'm tired or in deep thought, so I just lock my door muna when i'm not in the mood. As to your husband, important that you voice it out without judgment. You can say, labas muna sya or kayo na ang lumabas muna.
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maivy

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Re: My baby was shaken by his dad out of frustration, mga moms,Pano po ba...
« Reply #12 on: November 30, 2012, 02:45:57 pm »


For me, hindi dapat ginawa ni hubby yun, given na hindi siya sanay kasi atagal siya napahiwalay sa baby at sa iyo mommy, that is not an excuse para gawin niya yun sa baby.
 
My husband,minsan ganyan siya eh, mabilis uminit ang ulo,lalo na sa kids. I have 2 boys who are both sobrang playful at active. Minsan siguro,nakukulitan at naiingayan si hubby, kaya ang ending mas malamang na mapagalitan ang 2 kong boys.
Minsan wala na sa lugar kung magalit hubby ko, napapagalitan at  minsan napapalo mga bata, pag ganun, inaaway ko talaga siya. but we don't fight sa harap ng kids, kasi my kids would think that mommy is kampi to them and that mommy is over powering kay daddy (pero yun naman ang totoo talaga!hahaha!) ;D :P

I talk to him na mali naman yun ganun, 5 days siya nasa trabaho, tapos sa gabi pa (he's working at a BPO company), tapos my sons are so sweet na inaantay talaga nila ang weekend para lang makasama ang dad nila. sinasabihan ko hubby ko na, "ako nga 24/7 kasama ko mga bata, walang ayawan, wala akong kawala pag minsan naririndi na ako sa kanila, tapos siya ikaw, hindi mo mapagtiyagaan ang Saturday at Sunday lang"

Naiintindihan ko si hubby na bakit ganun siya, pero di ba?ang pinaka-importante sa lahat eh, yun happiness ngmga anak mo at yung welfare nila. Iyan kasi ang dapat nating iisipin at uunahin.

Kaya mommy, okay lang na kausapin mo si hubby, wag lang silent treatment, kasi kelangan malaman niya kung ano saloobin mo, saka para naman kay baby yun, hindi naman para sayo yun.
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