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Author Topic: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya  (Read 5230 times)

momoffree

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Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« on: May 08, 2013, 09:32:34 pm »

Hi moms,

I just terminated my yaya for 14 months. I'm feeling very low about this though may kapalit naman sya agad. siguro kasi I was really comfortable leaving my son to her na at super love na anak ko.

Kaso moms, c yaya kasi relative namin..parang sister narin sya sakin. medyo umabuso. I  think kasalanan ko rin kasi I seem to always shrug off the signs. Like, ang hirap mag ask ng favor sa kanya na palitan ang off days niya. Imagine moms, off days niya is sat after lunch then balik niya is Monday 8am. Super pagod ako lagi..when I tried to ask her to change her off days to sunday morning to monday morning, may counter offer sya so I let it go. Ako nalang nag sacrifice.

This time..umuwi ng province kasi bakasyon at fiesta daw sa kanila. I was taken aback when she said she'l be gone for 3 weeks! E my tickets na daw sila ng husband niya (di cila magkaanak). Then baka daw mag advance sya bago pabalik dito.

Nag txt na nga sya last monday, medyo malaki ang amount na gusto nyang e-advance, more than i expected. I told her I'll ask my mom if i can borrow money since i've been on half days for 3 weeks na din so wala rin ako pay mashado. Ang reply niya is kung hinde ko daw sya papadalhan, hinde sya babalik? Boom!

I don't know if tama ang decision ko. SUper love sya ng baby ko at super love niya din c baby. Kaso I can't let these signs go naman. Super ako naman ang compromise lagi sa amin dalawa. Hay...

I feel so sad.
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amieh

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Re: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2013, 01:00:39 pm »

Whew! mommy kaka frustrate naman yan!!  :'(
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mommie_of_TWO

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Re: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« Reply #2 on: May 09, 2013, 03:38:01 pm »

mommy ganun talaga..yung saken din yaya ng babies ko tita ko..malaki talaga pabor pag relative ang yaya unlike pag ibang tao..yun nga lang mas kampante tayo kasi sigurado tayo na alaga talaga si baby..saken kasi usapan ng mom ko and ng tita ko na pag kinailangan sya sa bahay nila, like magkasakit anak or apo niya, uuwi sya..so sacrifice kami nun..tiwala nga lang kami na maalagaan talaga babies ko kasi lola nila nagaalaga..naranasan ko kasi mommy na ibang tao nagalaga sa baby ko..puro sumbong narinig ko sa relatives ko na napapabayaan lang anak ko saka panay lang ang cellphone niya..even my dad nagsumbong na..muntik na daw mahulog sa kama eldest ko kasi busy sa phone sa labas..since then mas prefer na namin ang relatives..
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"When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world." - John 16:21

AMEN!

momoffree

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Re: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« Reply #3 on: May 09, 2013, 09:27:15 pm »

@amie: Oo nga eh super frustrated ako sa relationship namin na ako lagi ang nag cocompromise. of course for us mommies, super important na yung welfare lang ni baby ang inicip natin. Kaso hinde naman na din siguro healthy na ganun ang set-up namin diba? Dapat ma understand niya rin na may trabaho ako at sa situation namin, nacocompromise ang work ko para lang sa bakasyon niya. Yearly pa ang uwi niya ha? Okay lang last year kasi 4 months palang c baby at nakahanap ako ng reliever. E this time, 15 months na baby ko at hinde na basta basta pwede kumuha ng hinde sya sanay.

@mommie_of_TWO: Super iba nga pag relative. Good thing, relative din namin ang ppalit. Mas okay ang magiging set-up namin kasi she's a mom of two too so mas may alam sya. She can't have long off days din daw kasi wala sya rlative dito sa Manila. Sabi ko okay lang mag off sya sa Sunday like punta church or aliw-aliw. AYoko naman na hinde sya mag rest kasi para din un sa mental health niya db? Nakakapagod kaya magbantaay ng toddler?

Ako kung mabait, mabait talaga ako. Kaso yung previous yaya namin, super din naman abuso db? Hnide mo pa maturuan un kasi mas matanda sakin ng 8 years. Hay...super sad na hinde good terms ang ending ng service niya samin.

Kaso I have to do what's healthy for my family.
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Caddin

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Re: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« Reply #4 on: May 21, 2013, 11:41:25 pm »

I think you might have done the right thing. Your authority is not being respected na. Parang tinakot ka pa niya nung nagsabi sya na di na sya babalik if hindi ka nag-advance. If may utang na loob din sya, she'll realize na she lost a good employer. Saan pa sya makakahanap ng gaya mo na iintindi sa kanya diba?
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preciouslara

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Re: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« Reply #5 on: May 22, 2013, 01:59:36 pm »

sad, kasi hindi naging maganda ang pag end ng service niya sa inyo,since relative mo din siya pero in my pov, tama yung ginawa mo, sometimes talaga mahirap din pag sobrang bait natin kahit pa relatives or hindi, kasi ending umaabuso talaga sila...first pa lang, set your boundaries na, mahirap maattach kasi tayo din madidisappoint  pag hindi naging maganda ending..my pros and cons pag relative natin yung help natin,like other mom's here said,sure tayo na genuine yung love and care na ibibigay nila sa mga anak natin iba pa rin kasi pag kadugo diba unlike sa hindi naman talaga kamag anak, pero not all naman, swertihan din yan minsan...basta tama yung ginawa mo, since ikaw naman talaga dapat magset ng rules and siya dapat sumunod sayo since sayo siya nagwowork...pero lets just hope na maging ok naman ang pag accept ng baby mo sa new yaya niya para wala ka ng problem :) goodluck sis!
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momoffree

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Re: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« Reply #6 on: May 26, 2013, 08:30:20 am »

Thank you sis caddin and preciouslara for your replies.

Bumisita nga dito last weekend dahil kumuha ng mga naiwang damit niya. Ayun mega iyak kaming dalawa. Sabi ko nagkaroon tayo ng misunderstanding pero ok na un, magpahinga ka nalang muna. And then I said you can visit naman my son anytime you want kasi i know how attached she is to my son. yung son ko naman hinde na sya nakilala. Super attached sya ulet sa new yaya which makes me happy mga sis.

Buti nalang ok social skills ng toddler ko kaya hinde ako nahirapan sa transition nila ni new yaya. C new yaya kasi malambing, malumanay at medyo tahimik lang. hehe!

I'm so happy na though my kirot parin sa dibdib ko kapag naiicip ko c old yaya. The hubby is happy with the new yaya too. Mas calmer na daw c Baby compared dati.

Thanks for all your replies.
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didi

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Re: Heartbreak over terminating Yaya
« Reply #7 on: June 25, 2013, 01:34:57 pm »

I had a fight with my Yaya last January and after that fight, it was as if nag-away kami ng boyfriend ko!
It was sooooooo draining!!

She apologized in the end, which was just my consuelo.

Till now, andito pa siya sa akin taking care of my 2yo.

Pasalamat siya na dahil I require Pag-Ibig contributions - makakapag-loan na siya this month!!

Ang sama lang ng loob ko kasi I treated her like family YET inaway niya pa ako...

Sigh...
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