Parent Chat

Advanced search  

News:


Don't forget to check your email verification from info@smartparenting.com.ph

Author Topic: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby  (Read 3979 times)

Stebelle

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 6
    • View Profile
Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« on: November 06, 2013, 11:51:14 pm »

Hi mga mommies, just want to know your thoughts about sa situation na ito.. Yung baby ko kase na 4 yo ay unang apo sa side ng husband ko, so nasanay si baby na nasa kanya ang attention ng lahat pag may outing or get together sya ang baby at laging pinapansin, until yung brother ni hubby nag asawa, in short nagkaanak, yung bata was diagnosed with mild autism tapos kasama pa ng in laws ko sa bahay yung buong family, kami naman may sariling bahay, so ang baby ko tuwing sat. Ko lang dinadala sa kanila para makapiling din nila.  Last week nag outing kami buong family with other relatives, lagi nila pinapansin yung pamangkin ni hubby tapos yung baby ko parang na left behind, d man nagsasalita si baby but i can feel na nararamdaman niya yung situation kase minsan nakatingin lang sya pag yung isang bata ang pinapansin..  I felt sad talaga alam ko at the back of her mind my questions ang anak ko, mother's instinct ba.. Ang sa akin lang sana maging sensitive man lang sila sa nafifeel ng anak ko, dapat fair and right ang treatment nila.. Ayaw ko na tuloy dalahin ang anak ko sa ILS ko kung d naman sila fair..  Mali ba ako sa naiisip ko mga mommies? :( Thanks much  :)
Logged

annamariemomof3

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 145
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #1 on: November 07, 2013, 09:22:16 am »

I think sis normal lang naman na yung baby ang star of the family, that's just how it goes. lalo pa at special needs child siya so people tend to overcompensate. saka siyempre iba talaga kapag kasama nila sa bahay at palaki nila di ba siyempre mas may attachment at bonding. pero I think it would be a wrong move na ilayo mo baby mo instead dapat mas ilapit mo pa so that they can get to know each other better. ako nga I did not have a relationship with my grandparents on both side kaya di ko naranasan yun. kaya kahit naiinis ako sa parents ko at inispoil nila anak ko, hinahayaan ko na lang kasi it's their right to do so. dati rin inilayo ko anak ko sa in laws ko kasi nga lagi pinapaboran yung pinsan niya pero eventually tinanggap ko na lang din na tao rin lang sila at may favoritism dahil siguro yun yung kamukha nila. at the end of the day kasi naisip ko we're still a family. our parents and in laws are not going to be here forever. last night I was talking to my son about moving and he told me that he studies sa school about the cycle of life, that we are born grow old then die that's why he wants to spend as much time with his grandpa as possible. he's 9 if he can think about it that way I am sure we can do the same.
Logged

MommyniAddie

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 258
  • A proud Mom and a happy Wife :)
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #2 on: November 07, 2013, 09:29:58 am »

Sis isipin mo na lang na once upon na time naging apple of the eye din nila ang baby mo:)..Ikaw na rin ang may sabi na may special needs ang bagong baby sa family...It would be unfair also na di nila pagtuunan ng pansin ang baby na yun..It is normal especially sa ating mga nanay na maging ganito yung pakiramdam pero try to explain this to your child para di siya magtanim ng sama ng loob sa in laws mo...Wag mo din ilayo si baby sa kanila just because of this...the more the merrier ika nga..pero shempre sa pamilyang pilipino laging star ang pinakabata :)..Cheer up sis
Logged
There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage.

~ Martin Luther ~

SheIsErika

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 82
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #3 on: November 07, 2013, 10:04:57 am »

Just want to share my dilemma, my son is the only apo in the family. my sisters don't yet have babies. so apple of the eye ang baby ko not only to my parents but even sa mga tita ko, super favorite sya.. yung tita ko na super close sa baby ko ay magkaka apo na, i think by next year.. at as early as now iniisp ko na mababawasan na yung atensyon nila sa baby ko pag dumating na yung sariling apo nila, i can't help but o get jealous.. ayaw kong may ibang maging apple of the eye aside from my baby.. Selfish ba ko?
Logged
I can never forgive you. You made a fool of me. But you were the best thing that ever happened to me. I guess I owe you something for that.

ahyzeyuh

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1065
  • im a good person,just keep on making bad decisions
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #4 on: November 07, 2013, 11:21:27 am »

just my pov

mga mommies with this kind of attitude na parang self centered ang dating, baka mamana ng mga kids yan.
unang una, evaluate muna natin yung action and feelings natin. Kailangan ba talaga eh apple of the eye siya lage? kailangan ba compete si baby sa iba?

di natin hawak ang pusot isip ng tao. we need to be a good example sa kids natin na despite hindi fair-(or thats what you thought hindi fair) they still need to share love and be understanding.

Mga kids din mahihirapan pag naging "kulang sa pnsin" when they grow up.  they will be in school. mas madami tao, mas madami kids. if our beloved kids are being left out, ano gagawin niya, uuwi, sumbong sa nanay na hindi siya pinansin.

« Last Edit: November 07, 2013, 11:38:21 am by ahyzeyuh »
Logged

Stebelle

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 6
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #5 on: November 07, 2013, 06:13:04 pm »

Thanks much mga sissies, nakatulong sa akin ng bonggang bongga mga advices nyo alam ko naman na mali kaso talagang naguluhan lang ako tsaka nasaktan para sa baby ko, minsan kasi yung sis  and bro in law ko kahit kinakausap na sila ng harap harapan ng baby ko kase gusto makipaglaro habang kalaro nila yung isang bata d nila pinapansin as in parang walang nakita o narinig hanggang umaalis na lang yung baby ko na sad :(  pero dahil sa advices nyo naenlightened ako.. Kalma kalma na lang siguro pag may time  ;D God bless you all mga sissies!
Logged

ahyzeyuh

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1065
  • im a good person,just keep on making bad decisions
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #6 on: November 08, 2013, 06:41:06 am »

be strong for your baby sis. since 4yrs old na siya, pwedi mo explain sa kanya bakit minsan di siya napapansin and andun yung attnetion sa isang bata. explain mo din sa kanya na my special needs yung kasin niya.

ako naman, pag na out of place na yung anak ko sa isang gathering or event, i would call her attention and stay with her for sometime hanggang na maging okay na siya uli. subaybay lang.
Logged

Stebelle

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 6
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #7 on: November 08, 2013, 08:54:40 pm »

Thanks much sis..  :) ;)
Logged

preciouslara

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 365
    • View Profile
Re: Hindi fair ang treatment kay baby
« Reply #8 on: November 16, 2013, 02:17:58 pm »

so agree with sis ahyzeyuh, napagdaanan din ng baby ko yan, unang apo, pero after ilang months lang nagkaron na rin siya ng cousin, anak ng bunso nila hubby, since favorite son yung bunso nila tendency favorite apo din yung anak niya and place wise eh mas malapit hows nung cousin ni baby kaysa samin so mas madalas makapunta sa mga inlaws ko yung cousin ni baby, anyway it depends din bilang mga mommy kung pano natin ihahandle ang mga gantong changes, babies are always the center of attention and dapat maintindihan natin yun kasi nga once upon a time naging ganun din ang baby natin, pag nakikita ko na si baby eh nagpapapansin at nakafocus sila sa isang apo nila,ako na lang papansin kay baby,, kami ang magpplay, idadivert ko agad atensiyon niya para hindi niya mafeel na may favoritism, try to understand lang mga sis, kung pati tayo eh ganun mararamdaman,ang tendency yung ang makikita satin ng mga anak natin and it will have bad effect sa kanila diba, basta punuin lang natin sila ng pagmamahal, at encourage din si baby na ilove yung mga cousins niya na mas nakakabata sa kanya para pati siya eh dun na lang din mafocus attention, sabi nga if you cant beat them, join them na lang :)
Logged