Nicole Hernandez-de los Angeles, a mom of two, provides solutions how to handle preschoolers when they get in a fight.
CREATED WITH BELO BABY BATH AND BODY LINE
Play is serious business for kids, which is why playtime is sacred for them.
For Belo Mombassador Nicole Hernandez-de los Angeles, observing her sons Alonzo, 4, and Luis, 2, during playtime gives her the opportunity to engage and build a nurturing relationship with them.
She also believes that playtime allows her to give her kids gentle guidance when they get frustrated or start fighting.
We ask Nicole how she helps them overcome playtime problems.
How do you deal when the kids fight during a playdate? Let's say one kid doesn't want to share.
"I believe it's normal that some fights or disagreements occur during a playdate. I try to let the kids, especially my child who is probably involved, try to handle the situation themselves.
"If it escalates, that's when I intervene. I listen to both sides, talk to them like they are adults, and involve them in coming up with the solution. I also question or build scenarios where I ask, 'How would you feel if you were in their shoes?'
"I always try to ask [my sons] questions like 'Is it right that you don't share? How would you feel if you wanted to borrow something and the other person does not want to share?' I basically want my kids to come up with the realization themselves that they must share or they can take turns."
If you can't be present during a playdate, what should you do?
"I leave my kids with friends whom I love and trust.
"The rule is you listen to the owner of the house because you are the guest. Before leaving my kids, I always say to them, 'You need to listen to Tita so and so or Ate so and so.'
"I also just tell my friend or friends to correct my kids if they step out of line. I'm okay with this because my friends and I have similar parenting styles. I would also do the same for their kids. Of course I ask [them first] what their parameters are."
How can you break the ice during a playdate if the kids have just met each other?
"I don't [use] baby talk [with] my kids. I try to treat them like little adults when I speak to them, so when it comes to meeting new friends, I tell them to say hi, introduce themselves, and then ask for the person's name."
What if there are three kids at a playdate and one feels left out? How can all of them have a good time?
"I quietly pull my kids aside and ask them to include the person who may be feeling left out. I have no problem with this with my son Alonzo. He's very social and caring. Whenever I call him to include a kid or kids in the group, he always invites them."
Nicole believes that through play, her kids learn to be confident and resilient to face tough challenges that may occur during playtime and even solve bigger problems in real life as they grow. Aside from socio-emotional development, play, if active, also builds healthy bodies.
Make sure your kids' bodies are protected. Before and after they play, apply Belo Baby Talc-free Powder. It's made from finely milled rice and maize to help keep their skin soft, fresh, and dry especially during playtime.
As your kids explore during outdoor and even indoor play, make sure they use Belo Baby Hand Sanitizers. Mildly scented, these can help kill 99% of germs, but moisturize skin and are free from most common allergens. Let your kids choose among Blueberry, Green Apple, and Peach. They can even share a spritz with their playmate!