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  • How to Help your Loner-child to Make Friends

    Fostering friendships among peers is crucial to your child’s social development. Here are ways to help encourage him to come out of his shell and make friends.
  • boys playingOne of the highlights of school life is having your own circle or group of friends, but what if befriending others does not come easy to your child? What if he’s the ‘loner’ type?  Here are some things you can do:

    1.    Know your child’s personality
    A child’s personality is shaped by two factors – nature and ‘nurture’. Nature is the genetic makeup of a person, meaning that he may be naturally an introvert. Nurture is the impact of the child’s environment on how he develops as an individual. If a child is introvert to begin with, expect that making friends is a tall task for him. He will need a little confidence boost, some ‘nurturing’, to help him develop the skills needed to interact with others.

    Assess your child’s personality and understand your home situation that has possibly infleunces him to be a loner. Your open perspective is necessary to understand the realities, as this would serve as your footing in helping your child.

    2. Ask your child about his insights and feelings
    Once you know the root of your child’s loner tendencies, ask your child about his insights and feelings about not having friends. Questions like,“Why do think we need friends?”, “What makes it hard to go with other kids in class?” and “How do you feel about it?” will help you understand where he is coming from. Some possible scenarios that may arise are:

    •    “It’s okay with me if I don’t have friends!”  Some kids are not the least bothered by that, credit this to their reserved personality! Help your child by discussing the joys and advantages of having friends.  



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