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Vicki and Hayden Share the Roles They Play When It Comes to Raising Scarlet Snow
PHOTO BY Hanna Fernando-Pacua
  • So many parents now tend to hover over their kids a lot, which is why teaching kids how to be independent is more crucial than ever. It is a skill best introduced early in a child's life, and Scarlet Snow Belo Kho's parents have been trying their best to instill it even before she went to formal school.

    SmartParenting.com.ph caught up with Scarlet Snow and her parents, doctors Vicki Belo and Hayden Kho, Jr., at the Nankid Reshape Glamp day held last May, 21, 2019 at Enderun College. We chatted with them about how they encourage their now kindergartener to be independent.

    At the event, Scarlet Snow was having a blast doing things on her own, exploring the camp activities excitedly with the company of some newfound friends. From time to time, she ran back to mommy or daddy to show them a new prize she earned, tell a quick story, or just give them a heartfelt hug or a kiss.

    Scarlet Snow turned 4 years old last March.
    PHOTO BY courtesy of Nankid

    One can see the look of extreme pride in the faces of Hayden and Vicki as they watched Scarlet interact confidently with others.

    "She's naturally independent," says mommy Vicki, "A lot of times she wants to sleep alone na. What she likes to do is to explore the world, but she looks back to see if we are there."

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    During a storytelling activity, Vicki shares proudly, "[Scarlet] loves stories — she got an award when she was in nursery 1 for being the best storyteller!"
    PHOTO BY courtesy of Nankid

    Hayden and Vicki are evidently hands-on parents with particular roles in Scarlet's rearing. Hayden is always about making every moment a teaching opportunity. "Even every error is an opportunity. Most of the time, we see the opportunity to correct her when she is interacting with other kids — so we believe that playdates are very important."

    "He's a wonderful teacher," Vicki says of Hayden, "So patient! I guess because he is younger, he has more ideas and more creative ways to teach and to make learning fun."

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    During the recent earthquake that affected Metro Manila, Vicki fondly recalled how Hayden did not waste time using it to teach Scarlet about earthquakes while everyone was still in shock.

    Vicki continues, "He was like, oh! Learning opportunity! Scarlet, did you feel that?"

    "I am always marveling at how he does it," Vicki admits, "Me, I am always just the touchy-feely, like, 'Hug Scarlet, kiss Scarlet!"

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    Hayden defers to Vicki when it comes to nurturing and intimacy. "It's mostly Vicki's role. I don't know how to teach intimacy. Vicki is a naturally sweet and naturally nurturing person, so she learns that from their bonding."

    If Vicki is the nurturer, Hayden takes the role of the disciplinarian that includes staying firm with her principles even at her young age. "Of course, that means we have to teach her the right principles!"

    "We let her know that she is unique and different from others, that she doesn't have to copy." This individuality is something they value as a family, as Hayden explained that there may be things that they do as a family that others do not agree with or support or vice versa "We tell her, Scarlet, it's okay if they want to do those things, but we as a family do not do that. We try to reinforce that [to her] every day."

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