Xian Gaza Challenges Paolo Contis, 'Obligasyon Mo Magpadala Ng Fixed Amount Para Sa Mga Anak Mo'

As a fellow dad who left his children to his ex-partners, social media personality Christian "Xian" Gaza weighed in on the trending issue of actor Paolo Contis' admission that he doesn't provide financial support to his children from his ex-wife Lian Paz.

In a post on Facebook shared on January 29, the dad of two wrote an open letter to the actor, who guested in the show Fast Talk with Boy Abunda.

For context, Paolo responded to Boy's question about not providing child care support to her two daughters. Paolo said, “I had my reasons why, but I’m saving for them. I have some savings for them that, hopefully, one day, I could give them straight."

“It’s a mistake na nasimulan ko ever since before na hindi ako nakapagbigay.

"But ever since na nakapagtrabaho ako nang maayos, unti-unti akong maglalagay sa account para kay Xonia, Xalene, pati kay Summer, which eventually I want to give it to them straight.”

In an interview with PEP.ph in June, Lian confirmed that Paolo has not been giving financial support to their daughters. "Wala silang communication simula noong maliit pa sila hanggang ngayon na graduate na ang anak ko," she added, referring to Paolo. 

From one dad to another

Xian, who became known for his elaborate methods to ask celebrities to go on dates, clarified that his post is not coming from a point of hate, but he said, "from a point of a man na kaparehas mong may dalawang ex na naiwanan ng anak."

"I understand kung bakit hindi ka nagbibigay ng sustento because you have your personal reasons. Maaaring lulong sa sugal si babae or sinusunog lamang niya ang pera sa mga luho o baka naman may lalaki siya na pinagkakagastusan.

"Sobrang hirap maging ina jusko! Regular sustento na lang sana."

"Hindi napupunta sa kapakanan ng mga anak mo yung pera. Those are the possibilities. Nauunawaan kita. That's why pinili mo na lang mag-ipon ng separate savings account para sa mga bata dahil wala kang tiwala sa dalawang babae. I understand that."

He then shared his personal experience to provide context on where he's coming from. In another post, Xian said he impregnated his ex-girlfriend when he was 19. 

"Let me share to you this short story. Way back November 2021, nag-away kami nung nanay ng babae kong anak. Social media drama. Siniraan niya ko sa publiko without a proper basis. Postpartum depression. Her mental health is not okay that time. We didn't communicate for 8 consecutive months hanggang sa nag-reach out na lang siya sa akin at humingi ng tawad.

"From December 2021 to July 2022 na hindi kami nag-usap, my lawyer is sending a regular sustento to her bank account every first week of the month.

Ano yung point na gusto kong tumbukin?

Paolo, no matter what issues you have with their moms, kesyo hindi napupunta sa tama yung sustentong ipinapadala mo, obligasyon mo pa ring magpadala ng fixed amount every month para sa araw-araw na gastusin ng mga bata.

Kung saan ito gagastusin ni babae eh is not your problem anymore. Labas ka na dun. Diskarte na nila yun. Iniwanan natin sila ng mga anak na papalakihin ng ilang taon at araw-araw aalagaan habang tayo ay nagbubuhay-binata eh that's the least that we can do for them."

He quipped, "Sobrang hirap maging ina jusko! Regular sustento na lang sana."

In the comment section, one user lauded Xian for his mindset, saying "Isa kang mabuting ama Xian at isang halimbawa sa mga kalalakihan na gusto maging Padre de Pamilya."

However, Xian stressed that he may not be a good father, but at the very least, he provides child support to his kids. His post, which has been shared more than 18,000 times, and received positive reactions from more than 50k followers, as of writing.

Solo parents weigh in

At the Smart Parenting Village where parents can share their personal experiences and stories, an anonymous mom asked what she can do about her ex-partner, who was the father of her child.

"If you can't be present for your children, be man enough to think of them and their daily needs."

Her ex-partner used to provide diapers and milk for her child and P1000 financial support weekly until December came and he no longer communicated with her. She said he even blocked her on social media. 

Through the help of the Public Attorney's Office (PAO), she was able to get hold of her ex-partner. Now, she's asking how much should be his contribution.

"Kaya ko naman po sana na ako lang e kaso since di naman siya nagpaka-daddy. Kaso may part of me na, "Ganon na lang ba yon?" Tapos siya luho luho, inom inom. Which is labas na ko dun pero nakakainis po kasi talaga."

READ ALSO: Here's Your Guide To Get A Solo Parent ID Card

According to Article 194 of the Family Code of the Philippines, a solo mom has every right to receive financial support from the father of the child. "Support comprises everything indispensable for sustenance, dwelling, clothing, medical attendance, education and transportation, in keeping with the financial capacity of the family," the article reads.

RELATED: Pantay Ang Karapatan Ng Legitimate At Illegitimate Children Sa Paghingi Ng Suporta Sa Ama

With regards to the amount, it should be decided upon by the parents, taking into consideration the needs of the child and the capacity of the giver, according to the Family Code of the Philippines. 

Hence, the amount can change over time depending on the situation. 

Nevertheless, failure to give a child financial support is a criminal offense as stated in Republic Act No. 9262 or the Anti-Violence Against Women and Their Children Act. It is considered as a form of “economic abuse” and is punishable by law. You have the option to take legal action.

READ MORE: Quick Guide for Pinoy Single Parents: 5 FAQs on Financial Support

A proposed bill meanwhile seeks to punish negligent parents imprisonment of two to four years, who intentionally refuse to provide financial support to their children.

House Bill 4807 was authored by Davao City 1st district Rep. Paolo Duterte in November.

"Solo parents already have the responsibility of taking care of their kids on their own. They should not be burdened with the problem of compelling their irresponsible and negligent ex-partners to pay child support,” Duterte said, in a report by Manila Bulletin.

A solo parent of two, whose identity we will keep confidential, also shared her thoughts with Smart Parenting on the issue of sustento.

"Fathers should be responsible enough to pitch in for their kid's needs. It's easy to say you will give it in the future, one day, someday- that's easy, but those are still just words. If you can't be present for them, be man enough to think of your children and their daily needs. Mind you, ask for receipts, bills - fine. But give. And give what is due NOW."

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