Is It Okay To Discipline Someone Else's Child? When People Need To Mind Their Own Business

It’s easy to judge children’s behavior. Admit it or not, adults will use it to have an opinion about the kids’ parents. We all have to keep in mind that parents have a way of dispensing discipline depending on the family’s values, lifestyles, and situation. 

One mom in our Smart Parenting Village Facebook group asked if it’s okay for other people to discipline her toddler and in public. Her toddler made an innocent comment about their neighbor, who was wearing an improvised handkerchief mask, and the wife went ballistic and scolded her child out in the street. 

“I just wanna know your stand kapag nakita at narinig niyo na pinagagalitan ng ibang tao ang anak niyo na toddler sa harapan niyo at ng ibang tao?” the mom asked. Many moms weighed in. Here are their answers. 

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My child, my rules

“I personally don’t want to scold him in front of other people. Let alone see others doing the same. My behavioral impact po kasi 'yun sa bata. If I am in that position, I will talk to the person and tell him never to do that again. My child, my rules. Ako ang magdidisiplina sa anak ko.” — Mommy June

Talk to me and let me discipline my own kids

“If my kid is wrong, I will apologize. But I will be the one to talk to my kid and not others kasi as a parent, mas kilalala ko 'yung language ng anak ko. Mas alam ko kung saan siya magre-respond. Unless a doctor or a professional ang kakausap sa anak ko then I will be the one to look after my kid and correct them.

If it were the other way around, I’ll tell the mom how her kid is acting, but I will still not dispense my opinion on how to handle it. I try as much as I can to step back without giving an evil eye. Unless na saktan ang kids ko and my kid doesn’t receive an apology. Ay, that’s a different story. You just unleashed the mom monster in me. — Mommy Ibong

Dapat hindi pinapagalitan kundi pinagsasabihan

"I have this one simple rule: Kung sino ang primary caregivers, sila lang ang pwede mag-impose ng discipline. Of course, may exception like kung nanakit ng ibang tao or other serious offense. Second, normal na makulit ang toddlers as they still don’t know the social norms kaya 'di dapat pinapagalitan kundi pinagsasabihan." — Mommy Nemi

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Kapag family members, okay lang

"'Pag family ko ang sumusuway, okay lang sa akin basta 'yung way na pagpapagalit hindi naman 'yung sisigawan o papaluin. Okay lang sitahin o kausapin 'pag may nagawang mali o nanakit si LO. Big no sa pagpalo at pagsigaw kasi magulang lang may karapatan doon. —Mommy Nhelle

Walang problem basta may maling ginawa ang anak ko

"No prob sa akin kahit pagsabihan ng kahit na sinong nakakatanda anak ko basta may ginawang mali. Pagsabihan nang maayos, hindi pasigaw at pananakit. Then, kakausapin ko 'yung bata kung ano nangyari. Kahit sa school, 'yan ang bilin ko sa lahat ng teachers. Make sure na ang bata ang susunod sa matanda hindi ang matanda matatakot sa bata. Importante nasa tamang pangangaral at walang pananakit na magaganap." — Mommy Mary Anna 

Mali pagalitan ang bata sa public place nang kahit sino

"I will approach the person and ask the person ano nangyari and my daughter and I will apologize, if needed. Then, I will assure the person that I will talk to my daughter in private. Hindi pwede sa harap ng maraming tao. Kawawa ang bata. 

Kung anuman 'yung problem, it should be dealt with in private and walang shouting as well. Kahit na sino pang adult at kahit kaming parents, it is never right na pagalitan 'yung bata in public. They have dignity din to protect nahihiya din 'yan just like us adults. Kaya may bata nawawalan ng self-confidence kasi may adults na pinapagalitan 'yung bata in front of other people.” — Mommy Ana

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Discipline your child so that others will not need to discipline them

"For me, kung tama naman ang pagdidisiplina ng iba sa kanya, tama ang pangaral, hindi sinasaktan or sinisigawan, bakit hindi? Hindi kailangan parating ipaglaban ang anak kahit mali siya. Pag ganyan, tatatak sa isip ng bata na okay lang kasi nandiyan naman si nanay lumalaban para sa akin. Makiramdaman muna kung tama naman ang pagdidisiplina ng ibang tao sa anak at 'wag 'yung feeling mo kinakawawa agad ang anak mo. Kung may mali naman sa pagdidisiplina, diyan ka na magalit." — Mommy Vill

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