7 Habits of Highly Effective Kids

According to Agnes Ycasiano, clinical psychologist and consultant/facilitator of the Franklin Covey™ seminars in the Philippines, when it comes to teaching kids about self-development and reaching their full potential, value formation is key. Though buzz words like “synergize,” “be proactive,” and “think win-win” may make no sense to kids. kids, Ycasiano believes, “It’s good to learn these things early…and we have to do it ‘inside-out,’” she adds.

She further emphasizes, “…the seed is already in the child. All we need to do is bring it out of him or her.” After all, being a child at this day and age can be really challenging, and the call for parents to support their kids every step of the way has never been this [strong]. Developing certain habits that can make kids become effective and responsible not only in school but also in the bigger social milieu is important today.”


What does being “effective” really mean anyway?
According to Ycasiano, being effective means “being able to get [the desired] results over and over again, not just once. It means hitting the target right on.”

The principles of the renowned author Stephen Covey in his 7 Habits of Highly Effective People stresses that these habits are by people who live their lives to its fullest potential, who believe in themselves, and are passionate about life. These habits, Covey says, should be at the core of everything we do. In the U.S., in fact, these are now integrated into preschool and grade school curricula.

Covey writes of his experience at A.B. Combs, a North Carolina school that has integrated the 7 Habits in its curriculum: “…all of the students, grades K-5, knew and found ways to practice the 7 Habits. [It] had literally become a way of life for these kids…” This move by the school had a tremendous impact on the students’ academic performance, and when Covey was invited to visit, he observed: “…the feeling there was extraordinary and the attitude of everyone was one of passion for teaching and developing the leader within each child… It was inspiring to catch a glimpse of what these students have—the potential to become in their lives—because of how deeply they believe in themselves and the habits they were acquiring at such   a young age…”

Joanne Pangan, a Pasig preschool teacher, shares, “I think we can empower children if we teach them these habits. It does sound like a daunting task for parents but it can be done. If you actually think of the possibilities of how these habits can help kids, it’s really so inspiring.”

 

Click here to learn more about the effective habits of highly effective children.

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Read on to learn more about the effective habits of highly effective children.

 

7 Effective Habits of Highly Effective Children
1. Be Proactive. Teach kids the importance of being resourceful and taking initiative to find solutions to their problems rather than just complaining and waiting for Mom and Dad to come to the rescue or come up with a solution.

You can do this by giving them examples of real-life situations where they can be proactive. If your daughter always gets upset that her toddler sibling always ends up destroying her toys, for instance, you can say something like, “Well, maybe if you keep your toys in storage boxes where your younger brother can’t easily get to them, then he won’t be ble to play with and destroy them. We have spare boxes in the garage; they’re old, but you’ve always been good at art, maybe you can paint them and draw on them so they’ll match your room?”


2. Begin with the end in mind. When school starts, kids can set academic and personal goals for the school year: “I want to be in the honor roll this year” or “I am going to learn how to play the saxophone…”

When a child is aware of what he wants, he becomes focused and determined (excited even!) to accomplish this , which actually lessens stress and pressure on himself.

Give your child a journal/scrapbook/poster board where his goals can be written (drawn or sketched, for younger ones). It can include specific steps regarding how the goal can be achieved, problems he might encounter, feel-good moments, etc.


3. Put first things first. Help your childidentify the important things that need to be done first. Sometimes, kids get too eager to engage in a lot of activities at the same time that they tend to lose interest in everything or neglect them all. The trick is to assess what your kid really needs—try to focus on those, and find a balance. Having a planner or organizer or even a simple notebook will be good for older kids to list down their things-to-do.

 

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Read on to see more effective habits of higly effective children.

 

4. Think win-win, and,
 

5. Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Perfect for sibling squabbles, among others, this mantra can teach kids to learn that it’s important for them to consider each other’s feelings and to listen to what the other has to say. This then leads to developing compassion, the capacity to reach out and think less in the I-me-myself mode.

Covey says that this attitude helps kids think of their brothers and/or sisters as friends. At home, parents can actually practice this with the kids by staging a scenario of where these attitudes can be “exercised” or applied. Of course, when kids develop this attitude within their family, they will certainly do the same in school with classmates, playmates, friends, and other people.


6. Synergize. Each kid is different and special. When children realize this in themselves, it is then that they learn how to work and relate well with others in the community. When kids learn the value of “synergizing,” it is then that they are able to perform well in teams/groups, share their talents with others, learn the skills they need to be a leader as well as to be a team player, and build confidence in themselves and in others.


7. Sharpen the saw. It will always be important for kids to “remain kids” and not to rush growing up, hence the need for their parents’ support all the way. We need to develop the “whole child”: mind, heart, body, and soul. Make sure that kids get the chance to take a break and enjoy just being a kid!


Making A Difference
What the world needs are children who will become effective and responsible citizens, ready to reach out and do something for the community. The earlier that children can get into these habits—starting from within themselves—the greater their chances of developing into individuals who believe that they can make a difference—and will certainly do so in the future.


SOURCES:
•    Agnes Ycasiano, clinical psychologist and consultant/facilitator of the Franklin Covey™ Organization Service, Center for Leadership and Change
•    Joanne Pangan, preschool teacher
•    7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

 

Photography by David Hanson Ong