Be Inspired: 3 Stories of Love, Hope and Family

“Our daughter has biliary atresia.”
Sonny Pasimio, 36, and Ria Pasimio, 36
Children: Erin, 7, and Bea, 4

When her daughter Erin was just two months old, Ria noticed a yellow tinge in the corner of her firstborn’s eyes. She had Erin immediately checked by her pediatrician and was reassuredthat there was nothing to worry about. However, after undergoing a series of tests the next day, Erin was diagnosed with biliary atresia—a condition where the bile ducts are blocked so bile isnot flushed out of the body and slowly damages liver cells. It is a serious condition that could lead to cirrhosis, even death if left untreated. It hits one in every 15,000 babies.

Ria and her husband Sonny were devastated. They knew very little about the condition but learned that the only solution was a liver transplant. At that time, there had been no successful liver transplants in the Philippines, and the options abroad were very expensive. As their daughter was growing, the prospect of losing her was becoming more and more painful and difficult to bear.

Both parents had to deal with transplant centers rejecting Erin’s case and doctors telling them to start saying their good-byes to Erin. They had days that started out with small victories (such as Erin eating well), but suddenly took a turn for the worse - with Erin bleeding profusely and being rushed to the intensive care unit (ICU).

But Erin was - and still is - a fighter. Through Ria and Sonny’s many sleepless nights, their daughter keeps them strong by being strong. Erin wants to get better, and fights to get better. Seeing this faith in their daughter inspires them so much that it even helped Ria deal with her fear of donating part of her liver to Erin.

The battle for Erin’s life is physically, emotionally, and financially draining. In his former blog, Sonny chronicled their family’s emotional roller-coaster ride: “We are a ball of mixed emotions... We bounce from fear to pain to sorrow to guilt to denial and then to fear again. In spite of this, we are sustained by hope. Somehow, we know that the Lord will lead us gently through it all.”

If not for the help of their relatives, friends, Sonny’s employer Nestlé Philippines, and even people they hadn’t met such as those from the Philippine Charity Sweepstakes Office, they never would have thought they’d have a chance to fight for Erin’s life.

Ria and Sonny were afraid that they wouldn’t be able to find the best treatment for Erin, and thatshe wouldn’t make it through. But prayers—and the constant assurance from family, friends, doctors, and even strangers that they were doing the best they could as parents—helped them overcome those fears. Sonny writes, “We have never been more scared in our lives, but we have also never felt more loved.” With countless help and support from others as well as prayers, their love for one another, and the inspiration that Erin herself unknowingly gave in her fight to live and enjoy every second of her life, the liver transplant was successfully performed in Gleneagles Hospital in Singapore in 2007. Erin was just a year old. Immediately after both their surgeries, Ria was determined to recover as quickly as possible to be able to take care of Erin in the ICU.

Today, seeing Erin in school, enjoying every moment that she gets to try new things and how loving she is to her younger sister Bea, has made all the hardships worthwhile. If anything, the Pasimios hold to their belief that God is a faithful God. “You can allow yourselves to feel bad, mourn even. But after that, do everything that is humanly possible. Never lose hope. And as crazy as it sounds, enjoy each other through all the trials. Laugh and smile when you can. Always expect miracles to happen.  God will always listen.”

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“My wife almost lost her life after giving birth.”
Bennii Obaña, 45, with Anette Castro-Obaña, 36
Son: Andreo Elias, 2 years old

When Bennii and Anette learned that they were expecting a child soon after they got married in 2010, they couldn’t be happier. Anette wasn’t scheduled to give birth till June 25, but on June 3, she had stomach pain and was rushed to the hospital. They had to do an emergency C-Section because her placenta had ruptured and was separating from the uterus, endangering both mother and child.

Soon, baby Eli was born. But Anette suffered acute renal failure; her kidneys shut down due to the abruption of the placenta. Bennii and family started a prayer vigil and a blood drive for Anette, who spent eight days at the hospital. It was also during this time when Bennii found out he hadalmost lost both Eli and Anette within hours of each other.

When they were finally back home, Anette had to continue dialysis. Since there wasn’t enough improvement in her kidneys and her blood pressure was dangerously high, they were told to prepare for a biopsy and kidney transplant—or a lifetime dialysis.

On the night of July 26, Anette and her mom arrived home from her dialysis. A few hours later, Anette was throwing up and complaining of chest pains, so Bennii and her mother decided to take her back to the hospital. On their way there, Anette’s mom was suddenly panicking and calling out to Anette. Ignoring the red light, Bennii slammed on the horn and floored it all the way to Makati Medical Hospital. Anette’s heart had stopped. She had a cardiac arrest caused by an electrolyte imbalance.

Thankfully, the doctors were able to revive her and Anette recovered very well. She stayed in the hospital for about three more weeks to undergo rehabilitation and dialysis. On top of it all, Anette was diagnosed with acute tubular necrosis, a common cause of damage to the kidneys. Unfortunately, this condition is irreversible and they hope to find a suitable kidney donor soon.
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The most difficult part of the situation was watching my wife go through all of it!” Bennii recounts.
“We were just barely seven months into our lives together when she had the heart attack.” But all that’s happened has only brought them closer. What has helped tremendously has been the support, love, and talent family and friends have given them.

“It’s amazing to see how people are stepping up to the plate for us,” recalls Bennii. Despite their ordeal, the Obana family looks forward to a healthier life and a lot more laughter ahead. They continue to pray and be thankful, finding joy in life and in each other despite its challenges. “We wake up smiling and go to bed smiling,” Bennii explains. “One of the best things in life is waking up every morning to see Anette’s and Eli’s eyes.”

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“My husband is a recovering alcoholic.”
FF G. Pantaleon, 45, and Rachel Lee E. Pantaleon, 45
Children: Franz Felix, 23; Kevin Lee, 18; Sean Patrick, 17

“We were young and in love and thought that as long as we had each other, things would turn out right,” says Rachel, who married F right after college and became pregnant with their first child. Friendly, funny, and the life of the party, F was the opposite of Rachel, who was quiet and reserved. But the first four and a half years of their marriage proved to be a challenge. The sweet and loving F that Rachel knew grew irritable and uncaring. Their relationship and home life became unpredictable so Rachel just focused on loving and raising their son, while pretending all was okay.

When F came home from work one day and told her he had a problem, she thought he had another family. It turned out he had a drinking problem and needed help. Rachel was relieved. All of a sudden, his mood swings, irrational behavior, and their turbulent relationship made sense. They discussed possible solutions and found a 12-step program not far from their home.

As F tried to stay away from that first drink so he could turn his life around, the Pantaleons sought to fix things on their own, without involving the people close to them. F would attend morning and evening meetings daily and try to function at work for the family business in between. “Breakingthe denial that one may have a problem is the toughest obstacle. Once over this, recovery is then possible,” admits F.

Withdrawal from alcohol was difficult and painful for F, especially in the absence of medical supervision. Rachel was there for him through the cold sweat and tremors, but each day proved to be a struggle as he tried to deal with life’s demands without the substance he had become dependent on for years.

“One who is seeking recovery from such a disease may be attacked from all angles, by people, places, events, and things,” F explains. “These are triggers which alcoholism presents to prevent you from recovering. Two years ago, our family was devastated when our eldest son, Franz, was diagnosed with a childhood type of kidney cancer.” But they weathered through it, and the experience has brought them even closer together.

“The most difficult part for me was realizing alcoholism was a family disease that affected me as much as it affected F,” says Rachel. Although she knew there was a support group for relatives, she believed that if F stopped drinking, all their troubles would go away. As F immersed himself in his program, he learned a new way of living and dealing with life’s challenges without alcohol—and he seemed more serene than she had ever known him to be.

But Rachel noticed that she was still miserable. Each time he left the house or whenever they had disagreements, she’d be overcome by fear that he’d start to drink again. “I knew this was no way to live. So finally, two years after F entered his program, I attended my first support group meeting,” admits Rachel. “For spouses affected by their loved one’s drinking, know that: 1) you didn’t cause it, 2) you can’t control it, and 3) you can’t cure it. Seek professional help and know that there is hope.”

Being in the program had a profoundly positive effect on the couple. Having gone through the pain and hardships together, they developed a survival kit comprised of a firm belief in a loving God, handy tools such as the 12 steps, the Serenity prayer, slogans, as well as a very solid support system in family and friends. They worked hard to apply the lessons learned in every aspect of their lives. January 2012marked F’s 17th year of sobriety. “We now enjoy a deeper, easier, more loving relationship, celebrating 21 years of marriage. We still experience some rough spots but they’re few and far between. We’re better equipped with the skills and resources to overcome them,” says Rachel.

“As the saying goes, take each day as it comes,” ends F.

Photos by Pat Martires and Ocs Alvarez