Having a boyfriend, whether it be your yaya or your own daughter can indeed be distracting. However, the concern of most housewives is to make sure that this relationship does not become destructive either to yaya’s work or yaya’s person.
As in all things, moderation and balance should be observed. Having a relationship, especially for young adults, can also be a healthy occurrence. The key is to make sure you guide yaya properly, make sure your lines of communication are always open and reassure her that she can trust you --- that she will be advised, not judged. It is still her life, her choice.
Here are some tips that may help you should this situation come up in your household: 1. In a gentle way, set down the ground rules. Explain to yaya that if she would like to be treated like an adult (since she now has a boyfriend), she should also act like one. Teach her to be responsible especially when it comes to the following:
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a. Proper use of her mobile phone: As we are all aware, being in love can cause partial amnesia --- yaya runs the danger of being oblivious to time and place. As such, the improper use or perhaps the overuse of the cell phone can become detrimental to the well-being of your child as well as efficiency of her work. Hence, set the rules and make sure she sticks to them.
b. Proper scheduling of days-off: Knowing that raging hormones are not often respectful of dates and commitments. Make sure that you tell yaya the importance of keeping to her scheduled date of departure and arrival with regard to her day-off. You respect her private life, therefore, she most respect the family’s life as well --- people are depending on her.
c. Repercussions: Make sure yaya also understands that in as much as you cannot stop her from having a boyfriend, as your employer, should her work and performance start to suffer as a consequence of this relationship --- her overall performance rating/assessment will also be affected.
2. Explain to yaya that any relationship requires a “give-and-take”, whether it be a “love relationship” or a “working relationship”. It should be a relationship based on trust and honesty. Remind yaya that you expect the same. As an option, you may look at the practical side of things and guide your yaya with regard to the possibility of an unexpected pregnancy and resulting consequences.
Click here to learn more about how to deal when yaya has a boyfriend.