Quiz - Are You A Balanced Mom?

As we know, mothers have a tendency to lose themselves to rigors and duties, which can lead to either complacency or horrible fits of depression.  In all areas, a good sense of balance is of essence, however relegated to the side by most moms who have surrendered to lives of limitation.  In a great many cases, the limitations are created by the individuals themselves.  In their desire to become “supermoms”, manifestations of obsessive compulsive behavior become habitual, even self destructive in extreme cases.  In milder forms, some moms hole themselves at home, only leaving to check on their kids at school, do the groceries and visit family, and are perfectly content with this.  

I’m not saying this is wrong, but wouldn’t some free time with the girls, the old barkada once in a while be great?  Or simply reviving the old romance you and your husband or partner held so dear until you terms of endearment evolved from “Baby” or “Hon” to “Mommy” and “Daddy”?  

On the other end of the spectrum are mothers whose careers take precedence over their families.  Although they love their children, they spend little time with them, leaving the bulk of the nurturing to yaya or family members.

This simple quiz will tell you in all honestly if you are on that tightrope or on stable ground.  Answer A, B or C with utmost honesty, and leave blank if the question does not apply to you.  Enjoy!

Take the quiz on the next page.

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The Quiz

1.    Exercise or a gym membership is…
A.     Tiresome, expensive and would mean less time with my family
B.    Useful, a better body makes for a better mind
C.    A three hour after-office way to unwind

2.    On weekend nights, I like to drink…
A.    My 6-year old’s milk, because it tastes like “pastillas”
B.    Coffee or a margarita, depending on the mood
C.    A whole lot

3.    The last time I went to my favorite fashion store was…
A.    2002?  2003 maybe.
B.    A couple of weeks ago, I saved up for that sweet summer dress!
C.    Just now, I needed a new pair of shoes for the Davao Conference.

4.    My kids love it when I…
A.    Give them time to play with their friends without me hovering around.
B.    Make and decorate cookies with them on Sunday afternoons.
C.    Am not late for their soccer games.

5.    My husband/partner loves it when I…
A.    Actually get the time to make love once a month
B.    Initiate a date night, weekly!
C.    Am actually home

6.    My idea of Sunday brunch is…
A.    Cooked by me in the morning, so we can enjoy it at home after early Church
B.    Wherever!  As long as everyone’s in tow!  
C.    Dinner instead?  I like to sleep in on Sundays.

7.    I love to crunch…
A.    Crunch?  Oh dear, I don’t let the kids eat TOO much sugary or fried snacks.
B.    For my abs routine
C.    Numbers

8.    Bedtime for the children is…
A.    8pm on the dot, and lights out military style.
B.    Usually 8-9pm.  I tuck them in and my husband and I read them stories.
C.    When I get home, they’re in bed.

9.    A great family trip would be…
A.    To my mom’s place.  It’s not too far, and I can check on the house and the pets.
B.    Strike anywhere with a nice pool or beach!
C.    Strike anywhere as long as there’s WIFI!

10.      In my “alone” time, I am…
A.    Asleep
B.    Checking out new books in the store
C.    I wish I had that!

 

Click here to see if you are a balanced mom.

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Your answers:

If you answered mostly As:  You need to back up, re-adjust and put yourself in the center for a while.  Aside from being a wife and mother, you used to be an actual person with hobbies, needs and simple pleasures!  It’s no sin to indulge and let yourself go once in a while.  And the more pressure you put on trying to establish imperialistic control, the more tension there will be at home that will manifest sooner than you think.

If you answered mostly Bs:  Congratulations!  You have it made.  There is symmetrical balance in your life, you are having fun as a wife and a mom.  Keep at it and don’t change a single step.

If you answered mostly Cs:  Like the cardinal rule of fire safety: Stop, Drop and Roll.  Although you are doing your best to give your kids a great life, you may be ignoring the fact that a great life needs a whole lot more ‘mom’ in it.  Since they say that “the busy person has time for everything”, work your schedule, lighten your load a little bit and take time to watch them grow and help them along with it.  It’s easier than you think once you’ve gotten started.

If your answers are all over the place, well then so is Mom!  Find your center.  Take a little time, grab a pen and paper and jot down these things in columns:  What I should be doing, What I should be doing less of and What my children would love. This ought to place things in tangible perspective.  You are probably at a stage in your life where you are caught in between worlds.  It may take a little longer to find yourself, but when you do, it will be amazing.

Photography by Jun Pinzon

 

May 5, 2011

Phrase 3 of 4:

"husbands may desert their wives, wives their husbands."