Real Moms and Their Sex Lives: How Often is Normal?

Let’s face it—sex changes after marriage. Exhaustion, boredom and marital problems can complicate sex—not to mention having a child or three sharing the same bed with mommy and daddy. Then you have Cosmo-type articles insinuating that a great sex life involves latex whips, mind-blowing orgasms, live farm animals and coupling three times a week, including religious holidays. What we wanted to find out was what real moms really think about their sex lives.

We’re opening the doors of the boudoir and getting married women to open up about real, honest-to-goodness sex.  We interviewed various women from all walks of life, distilled the essence and serve it up to you as one potent dose of experience, observations and truth about what sex is like for some real moms.  We’ll show you their most common problems, expectations, fears and discoveries and how these things can be dealt with.

 

A Question of Frequency – How Often is Enough For a Normal Sex Life?

Almost every relationship article will say couples need quality time or that a healthy sex life is part of a happy marriage.  But what exactly is healthy? How often is enough? Three times a week?  Three times a month?

Does it have to be Michael Bay-Explosions-and-Orchestras-ecstatic ALL the time to say that you’ve got a great sex life?

From the fifty women we interviewed, we came to a fascinating conclusion: different couples have different levels of frequency of sexual activity. 

 

Click here to check out real moms and their stories about their sex lives.

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Read on about real moms and their personal stories on sex.

 

Real Moms Share Their Stories About Their Sex Lives

“There are months na super-galing ang sex life,” confides Sonia, a call center agent.  “There are months na wala ako sa mood.  Usually pag super-toxic sa office.  I just want to sleep when I get home.”

Oftentimes, these cycles are unpredictable and are connected with our life situations.  “I was less interested in sex when my kids were very young—my eldest was three years old at the time, and I had a newborn,” recalls Dindi, an interior designer.  “All my attention was on them, 24/7.  I actually felt bad that I had no time for myself and yet my husband would be competing with the kids for my attention.”

For a time, Eliza was worried that her marriage was fizzling out because she had fallen into the stereotype of slaving away for her kids and having no energy for herself or her spouse.  However, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t get herself into the mood for making whoopie.

 

The Cycles of a Mom’s Sex Life

Things changed for her after her eldest son started school.  As she grew more experienced at childrearing, she became more confident in her abilities and less anxious about her kids. The result?  Her sex life improved.  “I guess one’s sex life goes through cycles, and when my husband and I realized that and didn’t put too much pressure on ourselves, we were able to relax and enjoy sex even more,” Eliza happily acknowledges.  

Husbands also made similar observations, that there are times when the craving for physical pleasure ebbs or swings.  Men’s sexual appetites, however, are noticeably less affected by their environment and circumstances.

Better Nutrition columnist and blogger, Dr. Emily Kane, states that, “There should be little doubt that the most erogenous zone in humans is the brain.  For women, in particular, this kicks in after the biological urge to fornicate has been hormonally and physiologically subdued.” 

 

Read more articles about Moms and Their Sex Lives:

• Dry All the Time or Atrophic Vaginitis
• Fear of High Expectations
• Stress and Harried Woman’s Syndrome
• Improvement Over Time & Intimate Alternatives

 

Photo from sxc.hu