How To Teach Your Child to Honor the Memory of Deceased Loved Ones

As All Souls Day approaches, this is a good time to reflect on ways to honor loved ones who have passed away. SmartParenting.com.ph talks to Gina Estayo-Gloria, Directress of The Young Learners Collaborative (a progressive preschool for children between ages 1.9 to 5 years old) and Gabby Dy-Liacco, a professor and licensed clinical professional counselor who holds a Ph.D. in Counselor Education and Supervision from Loyola University, Maryland. They share their professional opinions as well as their own stories of dealing with the loss of loved ones.

Why should we honor the memories of loved ones?
Estayo-Gloria: Honoring our departed loved ones is part of the grief process. This way we are able to come to terms that a parent or grandparent has left this world for a better place where he no longer is sick, hurts, and has done his life's mission.

Dy-Liacco: It is important to honor the memory of a loved one with rituals and gestures of one’s affection, in order to acknowledge the psychological aspect of the loss and to heal experiences of hurt that may result from such a loss, whether or not one anticipated the loss.


How do we honor those who have passed away?
1. Establish rituals.  Dy-Liacco recommends rituals around anniversary dates (birthday, death anniversary, wedding anniversary, Christmas, Easter) to acknowledge the real, positive lasting influences of the loved one in one’s life. Estayo-Gloria’s family goes to mass together and visits the crypt with flowers.

Afterwards, they have a special dinner prepared at home or go out to restaurant that would have a grand parent's old favorites. She and her husband want to show their son Gio they can celebrate their birth life on earth and their birth life in Heaven.

2. Recreate favorite meals. Estayo-Gloria relates, “Food was big with my Dad, so Gio remembers Sunday lunches with Lolo Gene. Gio’s favorite is Nilagang Baka which my dad will cook for hours until it was tender enough to Gio’s liking. Gio called it yambot yambot when he was little. To this day Gio still calls it that way even if he is all of 16 years old.”  

Click here to read more ways on how you can honor those who have passed away.