Rica Peralejo Does Not Want To Impose Her Ways On Other Moms

All moms have been on the receiving end of a nasty comment from another parent and vice versa.  And Rica Peralejo Bonifacio is sharing her sentiments about it.

Last Sunday, November 3, 2019, on her Instagram Stories, Rica shared a quote she saw on Facebook. It read: "When you're trying to be confident about your motherhood, but everyone wants to tell you that you're doing it wrong."

She wrote she could not like it enough because it had "so much truth" and then added in quotation marks, "Mom bullies are the worst."

Rica went on to wonder why parents always think there's only one way to raise kids. "Can we not have different ways? Can we not do it a million other ways but still be effective anyway?" the vlogger mom of two asked.

The mom of two then admitted she was also guilty of imposing her way on others "sometimes unwittingly" or "sometimes deliberately."

"I feel like if it has caused pressure on others who might already be struggling, trying to get this motherhood thing going. I am sorry, really sorry," she wrote.

Rica says the only thing she can control and change in such a situation is herself. "I think we need a whole lot of grace and personal conviction about our own ways," Rica suggested. "We are coming from different backgrounds, and so the help we give sometimes can actually be more of a hindrance." 

Conviction, on the other hand, can help moms withstand "a world that prefers to talk more than listen, a world that wishes to correct rather than display compassion," she added.

Rica admitted that speaking online has been a challenge. She likened social media to a huge party with people you know and didn't know who hears or reads your posts. The vlogger mom revealed she gets anxious about who is reading her posts because it can "have a multitude of contexts."

But Rica underlined it's not just social media that's stressful. Family and close friends "who always have something to say about your parenting, directly or indirectly," can cause one to be "stressed and shaken."

Rica received many messages from moms saying they also feel the pressure to be good parents from all sides. "Everyone has an opinion on how to parent, and this is why grace is impertinent," Rica said. She hopes to model grace, conviction — and humility that her ways are not everyone's parenting truth. Hopefully, it's "enough that others will reciprocate respect and openness."

"And we must remember that different does not mean wrong! Different just means we aren't the same and that both ways nevertheless are good for our own context and families," she added.