Most kids don’t know how to deal with strong emotions like sadness, anger, and frustration. Because they don’t know how to manage it yet, their outlet becomes the tantrums, screaming, or even violent behavior. These behaviors can become a problem when kids start going to school and their parents aren’t there to discipline them.
Positive discipline: How to turn that misbehavior around
As the mom or dad, you have a large role in building habits and attitudes. We know it is not enough to scold our kids for misbehavior — they need to understand what they did wrong and why there are repercussions. It takes a lot of patience and missteps (allow yourself that!), which is the only way you and your child will learn.
According to WebPsychology, begin with your child’s personality, likes, and dislikes, what makes her happy, sad, or angry, what motivates her to do things, and so on. Here’s how to start forming that connection so you can enforce positive discipline.
Use “functional communication”
Experts say kids act out when they don’t know how to effectively communicate their feelings. To avoid potential outbursts, WebPsychology suggests “functional communication,” which involves expressing your needs and wants in a way that everyone else understands.
Functional communication does not always have to refer to words, especially because some children might not be able to communicate verbally as well as other kids. Other methods you can use are pictures, drawings, or gestures. Just make sure that the method of communication you use is one which allows both you and your child to express yourself effectively.
ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOWEstablish rules and consequences
As Verywell Family notes, your child cannot follow your rules if she doesn’t know your expectations of her behavior. Make it clear to her that these rules apply not just at home but when she is out. Putting up a list of rules at home that your child can see can be helpful.
Aside from establishing the rules, don’t forget to also talk to your child about the consequences she will face if she doesn’t follow the rules. Make sure to discuss what those consequences are — is it no screen time, for example.
Create a routine
Kids benefit so much from routines because it gives them a sense of security and certainty, allowing them to know what to expect every single day. Children don’t always find it easy to accept and deal with change, especially ones that happen suddenly. When a child has a routine or schedule she follows at home, she might find it easier to respond positively, even to random changes, instead of throwing a tantrum.
Encourage good behavior
Don’t forget to recognize your child’s efforts to do behave well. Verywell Family writes, “Give honest, specific praise for any progress your child makes toward meeting behavior goals, even if he doesn’t meet the goal in its entirety.”
Most kids might also be more motivated to continue good behavior if parents establish a certain reward system. For example, younger kids might love using sticker charts to track their daily progress, while older kids might prefer token systems, which allow them to gain a privilege once they accumulate a certain number of points. Just be careful: you want your child to exemplify good behavior on her own, not just because of a reward.
CONTINUE READING BELOWwatch nowPlan ahead
You know your child best, so you know the instances that cause her to get frustrated or angry. It can be a good idea to be aware of those instances and try to prevent them from happening in the first place.
For example, if your child tends to get upset when her nap is interrupted, try to schedule errands for the time of day when she’s up or lessen the commotion at home when she’s asleep. Planning can also involve making changes in your environment, like keeping delicate items out of her reach.
Spend quality time with your child
Some kids might act out when they feel their parents don’t pay enough attention to them. When you arewith her, be aware and be present. The Child Development Institute says spending quality time with your little one helps her to deal with sadness or frustration because she knows that there are people who will always be there for her.
All parents know that children don't always listen to their parents. Click here to learn more about 5 possible reasons why your little one refuses to listen to you.
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