'I Know Someday I Will Stop Being the Center of My Son's Universe'
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  • “Mama you are the best cook in the world, and I love you very very much,” my 5-year-old told me today while playing.

    “When I grow up I’ll give you a prize, a bracelet,” he declared.

    I stopped what I was doing and asked him for a hug. I then watched him play beside me as he continued to share all his plans for me when he grows up and when I grow old. 

    “You’re the best mama in the whole world. I will work mama, and I will take care of you,” he beamed.

    I smiled and took a mental picture of this moment in my head. I wanted to save this precious memory in my mind for as long as I can.

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    My little boy — he thinks mama is the most awesome person in the world, who sees mama as his superhero. He is convinced he will spend the rest of his life following mama around. He doesn’t know yet that someday when he’s grown, I will stop being the center of his world.He doesn’t know this yet, but I do.

    I know that someday he will stop following me around and wanting to be with me all the time. I know that eventually, he will crave for independence and possibly wish for a life away from me. Someday he will stop needing me this much and depend on me like this.

    I also know that someday he will meet the girl of his dreams, the love of his life whom he will love with all his heart and make the center of his world.

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    Someday I would have to step aside and be in the background as he builds his own family.

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    So, right now, I’m savoring these precious moments with my boy while I still can. I’m trying to save a mental record of his little voice saying:

    “I love you, mama, very much. I want to be with you forever.”

    I know too well this is not possible, so I’m going to make the most of our time together.

    I’m going to treasure his hand-made cards, flowers (that he picked from the neighbor’s garden), and little gifts. I’m going to savor the feeling of his little hands wrapped around mine.

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    I’m going to dance the ducky song and laugh out loud in public with him. I’m going to bake cookies and plant trees with him while he still likes hanging out with me. I’m going to listen to his endless stories while I’m still his best friend forever.

    I’m going to enjoy his every kiss while he still thinks it’s not embarrassing to kiss mom in front of his friends. I’m going to hug him and comfort him for as long as he needs me. 

    Someday I will stop being the woman of his life and I will accept that. But for now, I will enjoy his promises, hugs, and kisses. 

    Hopefully, I will have more moments with him I can save as memories in my head before I someday stop being the center of his universe.

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