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Getting Through a MiscarriageRead this heartfelt article by contributor and mom, Neema Ejercito, on how she dealt with two miscarriages.by Neema B. Ejercito .
I’ve heard of miscarriages prior to my experiencing them myself, but nothing really prepared me for my own actual experiences.
Falling Into a Pit of Depression and Trying to Get Out
After I had two miscarriages, I thought that the world might as well just end. I had experienced depressions before, but this time was different. It twisted me into knots, dropped me into a pit, and (sorry for the pun) was just plain gutt-wrenching. I thought I’d never get out of my depression alive.
I gradually sought the web for forums. There were tons of them. The more I read about other women’s stories, the more I felt like, somehow, I was still connected to the world and that my life could move on.
People kept telling me to just focus on my kids, my husband, and all the wonderful blessings I had that were going for me. Although my mind agreed with them, my heart just couldn’t quite keep up.
My Darkest Days
It took minutes that turned into hours that turned into days (you get the picture) of prayers, friends, playtime with the kids, dates with the hubby, and mental exercise to finally see a small glimmer of light. I read somewhere that what your mind conceives is what you will see in your life. I used to think that was a lie. But when I started making the choice to wake up better each day, when I started reminding myself of what matters most and what I’d like to be remembered for when I die, the cloud lifted a little bit higher.
Those were some of my darkest days ever. Without them, however, I never would have known the power of my choice and my mind in making good things happen. As Helen Keller once said, “Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.”
Three Things You Can Do To Ease the Pain
For those of you who have gone through a miscarriage or are in any kind of depression, I would like to offer you the following advice on getting through them.
1. Write down whatever you are feeling or experiencing. You can really let loose when you write, and nobody gets hurt. You don’t take the hurt or the anger out on your loved ones, who are only trying their best to help.
2. Stick to your regular schedule, but go easy on yourself if you just want to mope around. Try to give yourself a deadline on the moping, though.
3. Get yourself a support group. Talk to or spend time with people who lift up your spirits (whether by talking about what happened or not).
I don’t think we ever get over a miscarriage or depression. We simply learn to accept and embrace them. And the beautiful thing is that when we do, we learn to accept and embrace ourselves.
Talk to other moms who have experienced miscarriage. Visit our Miscarriage Support Group in our SP Forum.ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW
Photo from sxc.hu