Dear Parent, This Season Of Waiting For Your Baby Is Not Your Fault

Dear Parent, 

There’s another single line on the pregnancy test. Another period came. Another month will pass by. 

But you already did everything. You tried all the hacks and tips online. You have all the ovulation tracking apps. You already went to the doctor and got checked. You’re one decision away from trekking your way to Obando to try the fertility dance. 

You don’t know what’s wrong. Yet sometimes, you feel that it’s you. 

But remember, it’s not. 

Remember that it is not your fault. 

The journey of conceiving a baby is not an easy one. It can be a road of heartbreaks and pain. It’s a season of waiting without a deadline. It’s a season of waiting without any assurance. 

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It’s can be a road that sometimes leads to nowhere—you don’t even know where you’re going. 

Sometimes, you’re okay with waiting. You’ve made your peace with it. But there’s another relative or friend who’s pregnant again. You’re back to square one and you can’t help asking God, “Why not me this time?”

But remember, everything falls in its perfect timing. 

As content creator and mom-to-be Vern Enciso-Lim said to couples trying to conceive, “I know it’s hard now. There are some things that don’t make sense. But as someone who went through it, just remember that everything happens for a reason.”

It can be a season of growing together with your partner. An intimate time to cultivate your relationship. Of knowing yourself more, of knowing your husband more. 

The reason can be a journey of discovering faith and God together. A season filled with prayers. A season of finding meaning for every season of life. 

The reason can be a preparation for what’s to come—mentally, spiritually, physically, and psychologically. 

“I believe that if I got pregnant earlier, or much later, I would have a different kid. But the one that you’re meant to have, the pregnancy that you’re meant to have, is the one that you’re going to have. And it’s at the right time, the right place, the right stage of your relationship. It took me a while to accept that,” Vern said. 

There’s a season for everything, and this is a season of waiting. But it is not wasted time. 

As you continue on your journey of trying to conceive, hold on. However cliche it may sound, hear it again: Everything happens for a reason. Everything has a purpose. 

And as you wait, don’t forget that you are already enough as you are. None of this waiting season is your fault. 

Read more about Vern Enciso-Lim’s journey to motherhood here.