'I Cry Whenever I See Suman,' This Mom Knows Christmas Won't Be The Same Without Her Lola

It's almost Christmas, and while everyone here in the Philippines is either stuck in traffic, busy shopping for last-minute gifts, or preparing the menu for Noche Buena, Glendale Coloma shared with Smart Parenting a tribute to her late grandmother, Anastacia Padilla whom they fondly called Nanay Baket.

Glendale, 37, from Oceanside, California USA wrote about celebrating their family's first Christmas without her grandmother.

"I always remember the big wooden long table in my grandparent's house filled with food, people, stories, joy, and laughter."

"I grew up in the tradition of going to my maternal grandparents' house every Christmas not just to celebrate Christmas but to celebrate my grandma's birthday as well. We were always excited to see our grandparents, see our uncles and aunties, play with our cousins, and of course super excited for the food to be served on Christmas Eve. I always remember the big wooden long table in my grandparent's house filled with food, people, stories, joy, and laughter."

However, Glendale said, times have changed. "People within the family are now busier, aged, relocated, migrated, and died."

"In September, the star of our Christmas tradition passed away. She never got the chance to see the surprise we prepared for her this year," Glendale shared.

She added, she and Nanay Baket had a very close relationship, but they were separated by distance. She also regretted not being able to pay her last respects to her when her grandmother died.

Nanay Baket's suman and legacy will live on

She has this message for her Nanay Baket, "Though you are now gone physically, my love for you will stay and never change. I know for sure that whatever it is that we weren't able to give you when you were alive will be given to more in heaven. We will keep in our hearts and minds all the memories, stories, and pieces of advice you have given and shared with us."

"Since she passed, I cry whenever I see suman. It made me remember the time we were making it together."

Nevertheless, Glendale assures that she is doing her best so that the Christmas tradition and the legacy of their Nanay Baket continue for the younger generation in their family.

"I would like my kids to cherish their time with their grandparents like how I enjoyed it when I was young growing up in the province of Pangasinan. Though we are now living here in the US, as much as we can and if the ingredients are available, we prepare our favorite Filipino foods for the Noche Buena," she said.

"Since I grew up in the province, Filipino kakanin were always present on the table which includes my grandma’s signature suman malagkit. Since she passed, I cry whenever I see suman. It made me remember the time we were making it together."

'We don't know when we're going to have time'

Glendale tells other parents and children to spend more time with their family before it's too late.

"The time we spend with our loved ones will allow us to bond, learn from each other, comfort one another and build memories that we will remember and cherish forever. The pandemic just happened and is still around. We don’t know when we are going to have time. We can’t tell who’s the first or next one to leave this wonderful world," she said.

Here, she shared some reminders that we might want to observe during the holidays.

1. Take lots of pictures

"We don’t have many pictures from the past because we didn’t have a good camera as we can’t afford to have one in the past," she said.

If you have been meaning to book a family photoshoot for Christmas, then this is your sign to do it. 

READ ALSO: New 'Concept Studios' Make Photoshoots With Kids Hassle-free

2. Don't be a 'Marites' in reunions

Glendale reminds us to avoid this toxic Filipino culture, and focus on making good memories during holiday gatherings instead of becoming a "Marites" who is interested in knowing and spreading chismis about our relatives.

"As to what I have said earlier, times have changed and so people are. We should learn to focus on spending the time to enjoy and love one another, not on damaging each other’s name."

3. The best present is presence

Glendale admits, she's guilty of not spending much time with the other side of her family. This Christmas is another opportunity for us to be with our families and make the most of our time with them by being present and focused on creating new core memories.

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