Tidying Queen Marie Kondo Gives Up Tidying After Having Third Child, 'My Home Is Messy'

Things have changed a bit for Marie Kondo, founder of the KonMari method known for decluttering and tidying up. In 2021, she and her husband welcomed their third child and as she's revealed at a recent media webinar for her new book, she's no longer constantly tidying up at home. "My home is messy but the way I am spending my time is the right way for me at this time at this stage of my life". 

Rather than making sure her home is clean all the time, Kondo has focused her energies at home towards being with her children. "I have kind of given up on that in a good way for me. Now I realize what is important to me is enjoying spending time with my children at home," she said at the same webinar as reported by Jura Koncius for The Washington Post.

'My home is messy but the way I am spending my time is the right way for me at this time at this stage of my life' -Marie Kondo

Before anyone says "I knew it!" let us say, Phew! We're relieved more than we are wanting to be proven right. We're truly not alone in the challenge that is keeping your home spic and span while also making sure you're playing with your child, plus you know that tiny added load of work or a side hustle topped with quality time with one's partner.

But we haven't built our careers on keeping our spaces clean unlike 38-year-old Kondo. So the pressure must be through the roof for her. "Up until now, I was a professional tidier, so I did my best to keep my home tidy at all times," she said. But the business of life gets in the way even if you're Marie Kondo.

RELATED: This 30-Day Technique Can Help You Finally Get Rid Of All Your Clutter At Home

However this isn't your permission slip for messy. Koncius writes, "Kondo says she realizes that, as her children grow up her way of life will change again.'I will keep looking inward to make sure I am leading my own kurashi,' she says."

Kurashi roughly translates to "way of life" and the same article defines it as "simple ways to bring calmness and hapiness to everyday things." Kondo's latest book centers on the idea and is entitled Marie Kondo's Kurashi at Home: How to Organize Your Space and Achieve Your Ideal Life.

If you have not tried The KonMari Method, kurashi "will help guide you every day toward a more fulfilling life," says mariekondo.com.

"The true purpose of tidyingis not to cut down on your possessions or declutter your space," says Marie in her site. "The ultimate goal is to spark joy every day and lead a joyful life."

3 tidying tips when you have kids

1. Don't use cleaning as a punishment.

"The better message to send to kids is that cleaning 'is not a punishment or a chore, it's a ticket to other things being possible,' says Dr. Tamar Chansky, psychologistand author of books including Freeing Your Child From Anxiety as reported by Catherine Falls for NBC News.

"If you are negative and talk about what kids 'have to do' in a grumpy manner, kids will be grumpy back," says Dr. Chansky.

RELATED: Why Some Parenting Experts Don't Believe Kids Should Be Rewarded for Chores

2. Declutter once and declutter regularly.

In order to avoid things piling up at home, look at decluttering in two ways: a big project done once and then regularly. One regular schedule in the year can be before Christmas or before new toys and things come in, at the end of a the school year, and before a child's birthday. Decluttering often or as a lifestyle can help to maintainthe level of stuff that stays inside your home.

3. When cleaning with kids, keep it small and realistic.

How many times have you given up on cleaning and before starting juts because the task was so daunting? It's the same for a child when the cleaning task before them is not age-appropriate or when they are not accustomed to it yet.

With a small and realistic task, your kids will gain a sense of accomplishment "rather than dread whenit comes to cleaning," says Dr. Chansky. And that in turn will motivate them to want to continue cleaning up after themselves.

Marie Kondo's Kurashi at Home: How to Organize Your Space and Achieve Your Ideal Life is available at Fully Booked's Lazada and online stores for Php 1,596.00 per hardbound copy.

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