Bedroom action can become monotonous when you're married. And while intimacy can be achieved sans the physical act of making love, getting busy under the sheets can bring a surge of endorphins you badly need after a long day of running errands.
There are many ways couples can bring the desire and passion back into their sex life, but very few explore the option of using sex toys. Sex therapists recommend it, but it takes a gigantic leap to actually try it. We may not doubt the idea of the power of vibrators, for instance, but it doesn't exactly come to mind when you think of what can bring your sex life up a notch. That's too bad, says AJ Osmeña, the man behind adult shop Ilya, where the sex toys look, well, pleasant (our editor blurted, "It's so Pinterest-friendly!" You'll see why she said it when you scroll below).
SmartParenting.com.ph spoke to AJ via email about Ilya's customer base, and he claims it is not just composed of single women or men.
"There are people who buy for their partners and couples who buy together. For them, it is part of cultivating intimacy, and it makes their relationship exciting at the same time. It’s a great way to explore with your partner further and get to know each other better," AJ said.
"Most find it naughty-kinky while others even find it a sweet gesture when they receive sex toys as a gift," he added. "Bringing a sex toy in the bedroom encourages communication and allows couples to try out new things." But sex toys should not, in any way, replace your partner, he adds.
The belief that intimacy should be exciting and welcomed with wide-open arms is the driving force behind Ilya's playful but discreet design. Apart from the different functions and safety, of course, most of their sex toys are designed in a way that people don't realize they're sex toys; they don't look or feel vulgar.
“When it comes to sex toys, [the designers wanted] first to make the brand palatable, to make it attractive to people before we could even start getting the message across -- that with sex toys, it’s really about intimacy and sexual health,” AJ says.
Don't worry, you're won't have to make that leap blind. AJ shares his recommendations for first-timers, which can be great for long-distance relationships, and for those specifically for couples.
For the wives, there are the egg or bullet vibrators such as the Pocket Toyfriends mini-vibrators or the Iroha+ Collection of external vibrators, which are designed to be discreet but still deliver their promise.
Pocket Toyfriends, P1,220 each, shopilya.com
Iroha+ Collection, P7,190 each, shopilya.com
For the husbands sleeves or cups such as Tenga Cups or Tenga Eggs mimic the different sensations of being inside his lady. Each egg or sleeve is designed to give the husbands a different sensation.
Tenga Eggs, P490 each, shopilya.com
Tenga Cups, P730 to P930, shopilya.com
Sex toys specifically made for couples are also available. There’s the classic cock rings and even remote controlled vibrators that ensures the woman is having as much fun as the man.
(From left) Vi-bo Ring Ball, P1,420; Tickler Buddy, P920, and Lelo Tor 2, P8,300, all available on shopilya.com
The Tickler Buddy is a simple erection holder you place at the base of your husband's penis, perfect if you want extended foreplay. The Vi-Bo Ring Ball is the first couple’s cock-ring vibrator. It stretches and is quiet enough, but has just the right amount of buzz. Lelo's Tor 2 works like the couple's ring and makes sure that you both get the most thrilling and intense pleasure.
Look, relationship experts keep telling us to reinvent date night. Who knows? This may be the answer to your bedroom rut.
For more information, guides, tips, and tricks, visit shopilya.com