“Dapat Bayaran Talaga Ang Utang”: Melai Cantiveros on Money Lessons

In a sit-down with DJ Chacha for the latest episode of From the Heart, actress and comedian Melai Cantiveros didn’t hold back as she shared her views on utang, helping relatives, and the importance of taking responsibility.

Also read: How Much Should the Monthly Income of a Family of 4 Be?

When asked how she and her husband Jason Francisco deal with relatives asking for financial help, Melai recalled their early years in showbiz.

“Actually, ngayon nagkaroon na kami ng lesson learned. Pero noong first time namin sa showbiz, pahiram kami nang pahiram. Wala namang bumabalik... It’s a prank! Akala ko utang, pahingi pala ‘yon,” she joked.

Over time, though, the couple learned how to set boundaries. According to Melai, Jason gave her a practical solution: “Lesson learned na tayo ngayon. ‘Pag may lumapit sa ‘yo na umutang, kunwari 50,000, bibigyan mo lang ng 10 percent, 5,000. Pero bigay ‘yun. ‘Di na utang ‘yun. ‘Ito ibibigay ko sa ’yo, 5,000, sa ‘yo na ‘yan. Diskartehan mo para ‘di ka madiscourage.”

It’s their way of still helping, but without the heartbreak of expecting money to return.

Beyond the jokes, Melai stressed to the audience the importance of paying debts.

“Bakit kailangang bayaran ang utang? Kasi indulhensiya niyo rin ‘yan. Kaya kayo ‘di umaasenso? Kasi mayroon kang naagrabyadong isang tao na hanggang ngayon ‘di mo pa rin... so kailangan talaga bayaran ang utang para umangat ang buhay mo. Kaya mahirap ang buhay mo kasi may inaapakan kang tao... so balikan mo,” she said.

For her, even the smallest debt counts. “Kaya dapat bayaran talaga ang utang. Kahit magkano pa ‘yan. Kahit piso pa ‘yan. Kahit intensyon mo pa ‘yan o ‘di mo intensyon, balikan mo.”

The conversation also touched on tuition fees and the pressure of helping extended family. Melai recalled a time when she went viral due to a misinterpreted statement about not sending her cousins to school.

“May one time na nagtrending ako kasi ‘di raw ako nagpapaaral ng mga pinsan. Kasi ‘yun naman, ni-cut nila ‘yung salita ko doon,” she explained.

She clarified her stand: “Proud kasi ako sa mga pinsan ko kasi ‘di talaga sila humihingi sa ‘kin ng mga tuition ng mga anak nila, lalo na ang mga kapatid ko. Kilala kasi nila ako; ako kasi mana sa Papa ko na ibigay na lahat sa enjoy enjoy, sa mga trip, sa mga pagkain, sa hospital... Pero ‘pag responsibilidad niyo na ang ibibigay niyo sa ‘kin, very no-no talaga. Bakit? Parang curse kasi ‘yan. ‘Yan ang makukuha mo sa pinasok mo na buhay. Responsibilidad mo na paaralin mo ang anak mo.”

She also highlighted the difference between responsibility and genuine need. “Kung hirap talaga, walang problema humingi ng tulong. [Pero] ‘di ba ang sarap [isipin] na naglalakad ang anak mo sa aisle na napagraduate mo at hindi ng ibang tao? Ang sarap sa feeling na napagraduate mo ang anak mo na galing sa hirap mo.”

DJ Chacha agreed, saying, “Ang responsibility ng isang magulang, ibigay natin sa kanila, hindi dapat natin ‘yun i-shoulder. Pero kung talagang kailangang kailangan, halimbawa ‘yung sinasabi mo kanina na pang-hospital, andiyan ka naman.”

For Melai, it’s about balance: being willing to help in times of real crisis but also empowering loved ones to fulfill their own responsibilities.

Click here for tips on setting boundaries with people who keep borrowing money.