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Huwag Gawin Puhunan Ang Anak Para Sa Magandang Buhay Says Jaclyn Jose
PHOTO BY INSTAGRAM /JACLYNJOSE
  • “Huwag nating gawing puhunan ang ating mga anak sa kabuhayan, sa kinabukasan. Hindi nila problema ang naging problema ng magulang,” said Jaclyn Jose at a recent digital media conference for her upcoming movie.

    She adds, “It is the responsibility of the parents to take care of the children, not the other way around. Kasi bata pa ang mga yan eh. Dapat yan inaaruga mo pa, inaalagaan mo pa, tinutulungan.”

    Jaclyn has two children, daughter Andi Eigenmann and son Gwen Garimond.

    STORIES ON ANDI EIGENMANN:

    Media present at the press conference asked a controversial question for Filipino families, what does Jaclyn have to say about parents who look at children as retirement plan? 

    This question was likely asked because of her role in upcoming psychological sexy thriller movie Tahan where she plays a domineering mother who puts her daughter into prostitution in order for their family to get by.

    But Jaclyn separates the movie’s storyline from her own thoughts and compares the reality of child exploitation to parents who use and force their children into the spotlight for their own comfort and personal gain instead.

    Don't obligate kids to pay for your dreams

    “I’m sorry to say this, pero hindi lang sa Pilipinas, sa buong mundo, ginagawang puhunan ang ating mga anak para sa ating magandang buhay—pageant, kung anu-anong reality show whatever, ipino-post yung mga bata. Younger age ito ha? Jaclyn qualifies her thoughts.

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    She adds, “So, parang prostitution na rin yon, di ba? That is so sad.” Of course Jaclyn understands what may push families into this setup.

    “Siguro sa kahirapan ng buhay. Pero sana, through this movie, mabigyan natin ng lesson yung mga nanay na ito ang mangyayari sa anak mo kapag nagpatuloy ka na gawin yan.”

    In a previous Instagram post on February 23, 2020, Jaclyn says that while she was a solo parent raising her two kids, she did everything to make ends meet. And she is proud that she has never gotten a "single centavo" from her kids.

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    Pep.ph reports she wrote, "Wag i-obligate your children to pay your dreams, they have their own too."

    Hindi lang nangyayari sa Pilipinas

    In the Philippines, it’s been a common story for celebrities to reveal that it was their parents who pushed them to enter show business or beauty pageants. Often it is attached to a parent’s desire to pull their family out of poverty and it is the child’s talent that becomes the family’s investment.

    The reminder of children not being a parent’s retirement plan on the other hand comes from the reality of families who were unable to prepare for retirement and instead place the financial burden on their children when they become able to work and earn a living.

    It may not be as controversial in the Philippines yet, but child labor in behalf of the family has taken a different form in the US: that of kid influencers. 

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    In 2019, CNN reports of a mom YouTuber found guilty of abusing her children for her channel’s content.

    Other families in the US have made money off “innocent” content where parents prank their kids, and the attention fueled families to continue creating content that eventually caused their kids emotional pain.

    RELATED: ‘Gusto Niya Sumikat Bilang Influencer’ Moms Share Thoughts On Dressing Up Daughters Maturely

    Most may not go as far as physical abuse but parents are still forcing children to perform, dress up, unbox–all seemingly harmless activities. And the content created earns money for the parents. 

    Jaclyn reminds, “Higit sa lahat, hindi sila ang kailangang maging puhunan o itulak sa kapahamakan para ka umangat.” 

    “So maganda yung lesson ng film in regards to mothers and children. Huwag gawing puhunan ang anak. Lalo na mga bata.”

    When a parent puts too much pressure on a child

    The extreme cases may not be as common, but many parents may be unaware that they are already putting too much pressure on their kids, whether it is to perform their talents, play a sport, or even academically. These days it may even look like the pressure to perform so that the parent has something to post online.

    According to Very Well Family, here are the negative effects of pushing children to perform:

    • Higher rates of mental illness
    • Higher risk of injuries
    • Increased likelihood of cheating
    • Refusing to participate
    • Self-esteem problemsSleep-deprivation

    How parents can motivate children without putting too much pressure

    • Continue to encourage kids to do their best but focus on the process more than the result like winning or gaining a medal.
    • Ask yourself why their success matters so much to you as a parent.
    • Talk to your child about their performance and set aside how you feel. “Giving your children the space to be seen and heard will encourage them rather than make them feel they have disappointed you,” says the site.
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