Dear Parent,
Have you ever posted a photo of your child, thinking, "This is such a sweet moment," and suddenly, out of nowhere, someone has left a mean comment? It hurts, right? Actress and mom of one, Jessy Mendiola recently experienced this exact situation–people criticized her daughter’s appearance. And instead of ignoring it, she responded with firmness like a Mama Bear. “Nasa lahi namin na may eyebags kasi half Lebanese. Kalmahan ang paglalait sa bata. Iayon po natin ang ganda sa panlalait, tingnan niyo po muna sarili niyo sa salamin.Salamat," she said, reminding us to be self-aware and show respect towards others.
Moments like these make you realize how early our kids are exposed to people's opinions. As moms, we just want to shield them from every harsh and unkind word. But the truth is, we can't control what others say. What we can do is teach our children to love who they are, to stand firm in the face of criticism, and to spread kindness wherever they go. And maybe, just maybe, we can learn to do the same for ourselves along the way.
It starts with us. Our kids watch everything we do—how we talk about our bodies, respond to compliments, and even handle those moments when we feel less than perfect. If they see us nitpicking our reflection in the mirror or stressing over little flaws, they'll think that's what they're supposed to do, too. But if we show them how to celebrate who we are, they'll follow our lead.
Children are naturally curious. Sometimes, they notice when someone looks different from them and ask, "Why do they look like that?" It's the perfect chance to say, "Isn't it amazing how everyone looks unique?" Celebrating differences at an early age helps them grow into adults who see beauty in diversity—not something to criticize.
It's also important that we create a positive environment at home. Instead of focusing on appearances, we can shift the conversation to what our bodies can do. A comment like, "Look at how strong your legs are!" means so much more than, "You look cute today." Kids need to know that their value goes beyond looks—that their bodies are tools for adventure, joy, and movement.
And then, there's social media. It's a tricky space, even for us grown-ups. Imagine how overwhelming it must feel for kids. They need to hear from us that what they see online isn't the full story. We can remind them that real life isn't measured in likes or comments—and what truly matters is who they are offline, in the real world.
Of course, not every moment will be easy. There will be times when someone says something mean. That's where grace comes in. Jessy's response to those hurtful comments about her child was a beautiful reminder that we can stand up for ourselves without being cruel. We can teach our children that they don't need to engage in the same behavior if someone says something unkind. A simple "It's not okay to say that" or "I choose kindness" is enough to set a boundary while keeping their dignity intact.
And here's the thing: every child has something special about them. Maybe it's a birthmark, freckles, or even those adorable under-eye bags that Jessy mentioned. Whatever it is, we can remind them that what makes them different also makes them wonderful. The goal isn't to change them—it's to help them love exactly who they are.
As moms, we're all in this together. Parenting is hard enough without judgment, right? So, instead of tearing each other down, let's lift each other up. If we see another mom doing her best, let's cheer her on. If we come across a post and don't have anything nice to say, let's just scroll past it. We're raising the next generation, and they'll learn kindness by watching how we treat others—including other moms.
This is a reminder that, whether someone is a celebrity or not, we are not entitled to criticize or judge others publicly or online. Let's avoid being keyboard warriors. Instead, we should use social media and technology in a respectful and informative manner to inspire and help other parents.
In the end, what matters is respect and love. We can't stop the world from being critical, but we can raise kids who are kind, confident, and full of self-love.
It starts with how we speak, react, and show up for them every day. If we teach them to embrace their uniqueness, see beauty in kindness, and know that no opinion can define their worth, then we've done our job.
So let's keep going, mama. We've got this—one kind word, one hug, and one moment of grace at a time.
Help your child build positive self-esteem here.
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