• How to Answer When Your 4-Year-Old Asks Where Do Babies Come From

    Is there really a right time to talk to your children about sex?
    by Ana Leah dela Cruz .
How to Answer When Your 4-Year-Old Asks Where Do Babies Come From
PHOTO BY iStock
  • Most (if not all) parents find it difficult to talk to their kids about where babies come from. However, it’s this mindset that makes the whole process challenging, especially in a conservative country like ours.

    There are still those have been brought up to believe sex is either dirty or wrong. But experts think it is absolutely necessary for parents to talk to their kids about sex, even if it makes them feel uncomfortable. After all, educating your child about sex means keeping him safe. 

    So how and when should you do it? One of the most helpful tools we've seen is this useful (and fun) YouTube playlist by AMAZE Org. The animated videos can help take the awkward out of sex and offer valuable and straightforward ways to teach your kids ages 4 to 9 years old about sex, relationships, and gender sensitivity in an age-appropriate way.

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    Here are some of the helpful bits we picked up from the series: 

    There really is no “right time” to talk to your child about sex. 

    It all depends on when your child asks. If your 4-year-old suddenly inquires about where babies come from, don’t be scared. The question doesn’t necessarily mean it’s about sex. As the video below explains, it could be more about time, space, and location, you know, where your baby was before he was born.

    If your little one ever asks at this age, it’s best to say he came from the uterus or the womb. Don’t think he wouldn’t understand what the word means. It’s just like saying food goes to the stomach or air goes inside the lungs.

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    Kids this age are still very matter-of-fact about their bodies, which means it’s more likely that your child would just say: Okay, Mommy!

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    Calling body parts by their proper names is essential.

    It’s tempting to use baby talk or to make up terms when you refer to the private parts of your child’s body, but doing this can also confuse him. You may feel embarrassed about it, but at the end of the day, words are just words, and that it’s okay and can actually be really healthy if you say them out loud.

    Calling each body part by its proper name is also an excellent chance to talk to your child about which body parts are private. Show your child which parts other people shouldn’t intentionally touch — you're already teaching about consent.

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    “The Talk” should also include gender sensitivity and sexual abuse.

    Your child is bound to ask you other questions once you’re in the subject of where babies come from. He could ask what rape means, for which you can say that rape is a grave crime when someone forces himself with another person in a sexual way. Take this opportunity to teach your child the connection between sexuality and values.

    When it comes to gender sensitivity, it all starts with you. In an article we wrote about women empowerment, we found that raising gender aware kids, to begin with breaking social and cultural norms. 

    Another great way to address your child’s questions is to ask him what he thinks the word he is asking means. From there, you can understand where he’s coming from and how you can answer his question in ways he would be able to understand. You can check out this article for more sex-related questions kids ask.

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    There really is no reason to panic or worry when your child starts to be more curious about his body—it’s all a regular part of growing up. Being able to have open discussions with your kids about some things (not just sex) can help promote a healthy dialogue between you and them. 

    Ana Leah dela Cruz  is a web content writer with excellent babysitting skills and a knack for making mug cakes. She spends her free time feeding stray cats and badgering her mommy friends for article ideas.

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