Mom of Four and Illo's Founder Shares Secret: Be Present

“Someone once told me, ‘Just be present,’ and at the time, it sounded simple. But over the years, I realized how deep that really is. Being present is not just physically being there. It’s putting everything else aside and really seeing your child, listening to them, and making them feel that they matter in that moment,” says Anne Rovillos, the woman behind Illo’s business development strategies. She is a wife, a mother of four, a businesswoman and like most of us, someone trying to manage life while keeping one foot in both worlds.

Illo's (for Illo's Party Trays/Illo's Home Restaurant/Illo’s Prive Catering) is a popular food brand specializing in party trays, paellas, and celebration dishes. It was founded by Chef "N" Rovillos and his wife, Anne, in December 2019 from a makeshift kitchen in Parañaque.

In today’s fast-paced world, modern moms try to balance the demands of career and motherhood, often navigating exhaustion, mom guilt, and everyday challenges such as rigid work schedules, school needs, and childcare interruptions along the way.

Findings from Milieu Insight, which polled 3,000 working mothers across Southeast Asia, including the Philippines, show that 6 in 10 working mothers in the region struggle to balance work and family responsibilities. I spent 14 years of my adult life in the corporate world, so I know exactly how this feels: trying not to miss the school events while meeting company deadlines, putting kids first without risking your job, and choosing between late-night shifts or tucking your kids into bed. It's a difficult position to be in.

In this exclusive feature, Smart Parenting draws from the lived experiences and heartfelt insights of Anne, a devoted mom to Sabina Antoinette (18), Serafina Annelle (13), Seth Antonio (3), and Samara Andreia (2); a supportive partner to her chef husband; and a key contributor to Illo’s sales, marketing, and business development.

Anne embodies the resilient modern woman, balancing school runs, nurturing her children, and taking them on occasional trips while helping drive business growth from humble pandemic-era beginnings. Her days reflect the challenge many working moms face: being emotionally present at home while also helping build a growing brand.

Yet she finds purpose in what she calls a "busy life rooted in love." From being a real estate VP to becoming a hands-on business partner, Anne learned that fulfillment does not come from achieving the “perfect balance” most people chase, but from being mindful and present in every aspect of life instead.

Anne's story highlights values like respect, humility, resilience, growth, and self-care.

“Before, I used to think that rest or ‘me time’ had to be something planned or grand, but now I see it differently. It’s more about creating space, even in the middle of a busy day, to check in with myself and breathe,” Anne explains. “I’ve also learned to let go of guilt. Taking time for yourself is not selfish. It’s necessary.”

Married for nearly three decades, Anne and Chef N's relationship has evolved into a partnership built on complementary strengths. His creativity and passion balance her grounded approach, even amid the long hours and demands of work and family life.

Smart Parenting (SP): What was your first impression of Chef N before he became the chef and father people see today?

Anne (A): Even back then, he already had a natural love for cooking. He would always cook for people, especially his friends, and you could really see how much joy he found in feeding others.

At the same time, he was very animated, funny, and full of life. He had this playful, carefree energy that naturally drew people in. Honestly, he was the kind of person I never imagined I would end up with. I was very girly and more put together, while he had this easygoing, lighthearted personality that did not always take things too seriously.

Looking back now, that contrast was probably what made things work. Beneath all that humor and energy, there was always something steady about him. He had quiet confidence and a sense of direction, even if it had not fully taken shape yet. Almost three decades later, it's amazing to see how that same passion and heart have grown into the person he is today.

SP: What do you enjoy most about the life you’ve built with Chef N?

A: What I love most is how real everything feels. We started in a simple makeshift home kitchen, just trying to make things work with what we had. Even before that, we had our share of business attempts that did not quite succeed, and there were moments when we trusted too much and had to face disappointment. Those experiences were not easy, but they shaped the way we see things today.

SP: How has your relationship evolved as his career in the culinary world grew?

A: In the beginning, we were simply figuring things out as a couple. But as his career started taking shape, we had to become more intentional in how we supported one another.

There were seasons when work demanded so much of his time and energy, especially during the early growth of the business. During those times, I naturally took on more responsibilities at home, making sure the kids and everything else remained steady.

At the same time, I stepped into my own role in the business, focusing on areas where I could contribute confidently, particularly in sales, marketing, and relationship building.

Over time, we learned how to complement one other. He brings vision and creativity, while I help ground those ideas and translate them into something that connects with people.

SP: What do people often misunderstand about being married to a chef?

A: Most people think it’s always exciting, that you’re constantly surrounded by good food and special moments. While there are days like that, what people do not always see is the discipline and sacrifice behind it.

There are long hours, physical and mental exhaustion, and moements when work has to come first, even during important family occasions.

What surprises people most is that being married to a chef is not really about food. It’s about being married to someone deeply driven by passion. That kind of passion does not switch off. It shows up in how they think, create, and push themselves. Sometimes, that means carrying a lot mentally even after they’ve come home.

You also learn to live on a different rhythm. Schedules do not always align with everyone else’s. Celebrations do not always happen on the exact day. You learn to create your own timing and your own way of making moments special.

SP: In what ways do you support each other, both at home and in his work?

A: We've learned to meet each other where we are, depending on what the season requires.

When he’s deeply focused on work and things become overwhelming, I naturally take charge at home to keep things stable for the kids. When I feel stretched or tired, he makes sure I feel seen and appreciated in ways that matter.

One thing we’ve both learned is the importance of stepping away when needed. We make time for breathers, even if it’s just a quick family trip or time away together. Those moments help us reset, reconnect, and remind ourselves why we’re doing all of this in the first place.

Motherhood transformed Anne through experiences such as miscarriage and a high-risk pregnancy, teaching her quiet strength and the importance of presence over perfection. Her journey reveals unexpected gifts of motherhood: deeper love, personal growth, and redefining success beyond what people can see.

SP: How has becoming a mother changed you over the years?

A: Motherhood changed me in ways I never fully expected. It softened me, but it also gave me a quiet kind of strength. I became more patient, more understanding, and more intentional in how I show up every day. There’s a deeper sense of purpose now because everything I do is no longer just for myself, but for the life we are building as a family.

What challenged me most was navigating different seasons of motherhood. There’s a ten-year gap between our second and third child, so I experienced two very different phases that almost felt like starting all over again. I had to relearn how to care, how to listen, and how to be present in a different way, while still guiding our older children as they grow into their own identities.

There were also experiences that changed me on a deeper level. Before our third child, I went through a miscarriage, and that shifted the way I viewed motherhood. It made me hold on tighter, love more intentionally, and never take any moment for granted.

More than anything, motherhood grounded me. It taught me to slow down, appreciate the small moments, and understand that the most important things we build are not always visible, but deeply felt.

SP: How do you approach raising your children while balancing a busy household and your business?

A: I’ve learned that balance does not really mean everything is equal all the time. There are days when the kids need more of me, and there are days when the business requires more attention. What matters is that wherever I am, I try to be fully present.

Over time, I became more intentional in how I manage both. I no longer try to do everything all at once. I prioritize, pace myself, and accept that some days will feel heavier than others.

What helped me most was understanding that it's not about dividing my time perfectly. It’s about making the time I give meaningful.

SP: What are some lessons you’ve learned from your children themselves?

A: They have taught me patience in a way nothing else could. Not just patience in waiting, but patience in truly understanding them, listening without rushing, and accepting that growth takes time.

They’ve also taught me honesty, the kind that is unfiltered and real. Children say things exactly as they see them, and sometimes that becomes a mirror for you as a parent. It makes you more aware of how you act, how you speak, and the example you set every day.

In many ways, they've taught me to slow down and be present, not only for them, but for life itself. You realize that while you’re trying to raise them, they're also shaping you into a better, more grounded person.

SP: What values did your parents instill in you that you’re now passing on to your children?

A: Respect, humility, and resilience were deeply instilled in me growing up, and they’re the same values I try to pass on to my children every day.

I was raised to understand that you treat people well regardless of who they are, that you stay grounded no matter what you achieve, and that life will not always be easy, but you continue showing up with strength and integrity.

SP: What has motherhood taught you about yourself that you didn’t expect?

A: I learned that I’m stronger than I thought, but not in a loud or obvious way. It’s a quiet strength, the kind that shows up on days when you feel like you have nothing left, yet somehow still find a way to give more and keep showing up.

SP: What advice would you give to other moms who are trying to balance family, partnership, and their own identity?

A: Don’t lose yourself in the process. It’s so easy to pour everything into your family and responsibilities that, little by little, you forget who you are outside of those roles.

But the truth is, you don’t have to choose. You can be a mother, a partner, and still hold on to your own identity.

What helped me was understanding that balance is not about doing everything perfectly all at once. There will be seasons when your family needs more of you, and there will be times when you can focus more on yourself or your work. It’s about allowing yourself to grow into those roles instead of trying to control everything all at once.

And give yourself grace. There will be moments when you feel like you’re falling short, and that’s okay. You are allowed to learn, to adjust, and to evolve.

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