'Kamustahin Ang Anak Bago Ang Grades' Mom's Parenting Reminder Goes Viral

"Let’s normalize kamustahin muna ang anak bago ang grades,” said Chen Sario-Hernandez in a video that has now become viral. That sentence alone is what likely caused the unassuming TikTok to take over netizen's feeds.

The time-lapse TikTok video showed a mother and son eating together in their favorite fast-food restaurant, a seemingly normal and simple moment. It was their conversation that tugged on the hearts of netizens.

Chen, a stay at home mom, wrote in TikTok, “Let’s normalize [na] kamustahin muna ang anak bago ang grades.” She also shared her conversation with her seven year old son:

“Habang kumakain kami, kinumusta ko siya:

Me: Kamusta ka?
Zane: Okay lang, Ma.
Me: Sa school kamusta ka? May problem ka ba?
Zane: Okay lang, Ma. Kaso mabagal ako magsulat, tsaka wala ako sa rank.
Me: Don’t worry anak, sabi ko naman sa’yo, okay lang kahit wala kang award. Ang importante, ginagawa mo yung best mo at nag-aaral kang mabuti. Kung wala ka sa rank, hindi ibig sabihin nun, hindi ka matalino at magaling. Matalino at magaling ka anak sa sarili mong paraan. Mag-enjoy ka lang sa school at wag ma-pressure, okay? Proud sa’yo si Mama at Papa palagi (Napaiyak siya sa sinabi ko.)
Zane: Thank you Mama hindi ka nagalit. (Naiiyak na din ako.)”

“Ang pure lang ng conversation namin, na-a-appreciate ako ng anak ko at na-a-appreciate ko din siya palagi. I love you, anak! Mahal na mahal ka namin.” Chen included in the caption.

With over two million views in TikTok, netizens frequently commented, “Thank you, mommy, for sharing this, it’s healing my inner child.”

@chensariohernandez

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The video speed was adjusted but it was clear that the mother-and-son duo indeed had a heartfelt conversation. It was a tear-jerking moment when her son Zane began to cry. He gently wiped his tears while his Mom comforted him continuously. Chen was also on the verge of crying but she tried to hold back her tears to make sure she could affirm and support her son. Who would have thought that a simple conversation with a seven-year-old could have so many emotions?

Smart Parenting reached out to Chen to ask her about her viral video.

“Si Zane bilang anak, super sweet, caring, appreciative, mabait, generous. Nasa kanya na po ata ang lahat. Kaya sobrang blessed ko po to have him. Masipag din po siyang mag-aral,” Chen said about her son. Zane's father is a Grab car driver.

'Simple lang naman po yung parenting style ko. Gusto ko lang po maging open siya sakin sa lahat ng bagay.' —Chen Sario-Hernandez, stay at home mom

About Zane’s study habits, Chen said, “Very independent na bata si Zane pagdating sa pag-aaral. Kaya sometimes, mas gusto niya na nag-aaral lang siya mag-isa. Pero if test or exam day, nandun naman po ako para i-guide at turuan po siya.”

Zane is 7 years old and is in second grade. He is enrolled in a public school. Chen shared that they do not put pressure on him about grades or being top of his class, rather it was Zane wanted it. “To make us proud siguro. Kaya binigyan ko siya ng assurance na proud kami ng Papa niya sa kanya with or without honors,” she added.

In another media interview with Bandera, Chen shared that it is her routine to check on her son every day after going to school. That particular day when they took the video, report cards were released and class rankings were announced.

“Sadly, wala siya (in the class honors), but matataas po ‘yung grades niya. At para hindi po siya ma-sad, niyaya ko siya sa fave fast food niya para i-treat siya at bigyan din ng assurance na okay lang sa 'kin kahit hindi siya nakasama sa rank at sobrang proud pa rin ako sa kanya,” Chen shared.

RELATED: Magna Cum Laude Grad Shamcey Supsup Says 'Grades Are Not Everything'

New parenting style

One reason why Chen’s video caught netizens’ attention is because her parenting style is different from what others consider to be old-school parenting that pressures kids to always achieve high grades or make it to the class honors list. Often, the pressure for a child to be an achiever is because of his parents’ expectations. Parents may fail to realize that kids also have emotions, and they can feel tired and pressured, too. It’s refreshing to see parents who prioritize their child’s emotional well-being over recognition and accolades.

Smart Parenting asked Chen about their parenting style. She said, “Simple lang naman po yung parenting style ko. Gusto ko lang po maging open siya sakin sa lahat ng bagay. Para kapag may sad or happy moments siya, masasabi niya pa rin po sakin without fearing judgment. At gusto ko po na maging role model sa kanya.”

She also has this reminder for parents, “Wag po natin i-pressure ang ating mga anak especially sa pag-aaral nila. Wag nating hayaan na maging miserable sila or can’t enjoy learning dahil sa high expectations parents have.”

What life skills can you grow in your children apart from academic excellence? Read this article to find out.