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Loving Yourself Is Not Selfish: Sheryl Cruz Shares Eulogy for Her ‘Mama Inday’, Susan Roces
PHOTO BY INSTAGRAM /OFFICIALSHERYLCRUZ
  • It has been a week since the passing of the Queen of Philippine Movies and decorated actress, Susan Roces. She passed on May 20, 2022 and the entertainment industry has said nothing but praises for her.

    Naturally, her relatives whom she has also influenced into the limelight long to give their own praises and share their love. Sheryl Cruz, mom of one, actress, singer and niece of Susan Roces posted on Instagram her “open eulogy”.

    Sheryl is Susan Roces’ niece. Susan is the younger sister of her mother, former actress Rosemarie Soñora with husband Ricky Belmonte. Sheryl has one daughter, Ashley.

    Mama Inday, Sheryl’s beloved second mother

    Sheryl starts her eulogy greeting their relatives and the role ‘Mama Inday’ played in raising her and her siblings.

    “Even though she had a very busy and full life with friends, family, and her job, she still made time for each of us just like she did most of the time when she would always ask me to model clothes for her.

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    RELATED: Sen. Grace Poe On Mom Susan Roces' Passing: 'Pinalaki Niya Ako Na Maging Maligaya Sa Kakaunti Na Meron'

    Sheryl recounted the many lessons she learned from Susan Roces, including living simply and remembering that our live are not just our own. 

    Below are some of Sheryl’s life lessons from the late Susan Roces.

    1. Live within your means.

    “She said as long as we are physically fit, it won’t matter in the clothes we wear are designer brands or not.

    “She taught me to live simply within my means. She taught me to listen to the radio for current news and traffic routes.

    “Because of her, we learned to have meaningful conversations, talking about everything from entertainment news, local and foreign politics, general weather, food, just about anything. Even romance which included the birds and the bees.

    RELATED: 'Bawasan Ang Inggit' Plus Other Tips From Real Dads On Managing The Family Finances

    2. ‘You and me against the world’ is not enough.

    Young love often gets a bad rap for throwing away all care and wisdom in the name of love, and Susan made sure to remind Sheryl of life’s realities. 

    “As I experience falling in love, she always reminded me that my relationship is not just between my boyfriend and me. Hindi raw puwede na you and me against the world lamang dahil malaki ang mundo na ginagalawang nating lahat.

    'According to Mama Inday, loving and taking care of ourselves is not being selfish.'

    “Ang sabi pa niya, kapag mahal ko raw ang isang tao at handa na akong makasama ito na habambuhay, malalaman ko naman daw ang sagot sa pagtanong sa sarili ko kung kakayanin ko bang mahalin pa siya kahit nadagdagan ang timbang nito, naubos na ba ang buhok sa ulo, nagkandabungi-bungi na ba ang mga ngipin nito at kung anu-ano pa.”

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    Sheryl shared that Susan was always by her side whenever she would experience heartbreaks and was also ready to celebrate every triumph with her niece.

    3. Loving yourself is not selfish.

    “One thing I will never forget is her teaching me to love myself for me to love others. To love oneself is the greatest love of all.

    “According to Mama Inday, loving and taking care of ourselves is not being selfish. It is important because if we respect ourselves, it shows our loved ones that we value and love them. It tells them not to worry about us even if we are separated by distance.

    RELATED: I Love My Kids, But I Miss My Life: Real Moms On Surviving The Pressure Of Motherhood

    For mothers, this lesson is especially important to learn and re-learn. Mothers are often ready to set aside their needs and wants as a way to love their families. 

    But it seems based on Sheryl’s accounts that Susan knew that mothers especially, would benefit from loving themselves just as much as they love their children and partners.

    4. Finish your education and be professional at work.

    “As I got older, she managed to impart her values and standards to me. Education is something that she values and something that she expected us to complete,” Sheryl says.

    “Professionalism at work is something that she instilled in us as it reflects our love for our work, bosses and co-workers especially since we belong in the same industry.

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    Sheryl continues to sing and act at GMA. She is currently part of the Prima Donnas cast and performs on All Out Sundays.

    RELATED: Mom Gets Her College Degree 28 Years Later Alongside Her Two Kids

    'Thank you for giving me courage and faith in myself'

    Sheryl ends her open eulogy by expressing her gratitude to Susan.

    “Thank you Mama Inday for giving me courage and faith in myself, for teaching me to choose my battles and not to allow anyone to trample on my rights as a person or throw mud on my dignity.

    “She was a true role model for me, a very big part of me. My mama knows that Mama Inday is the reason why I am the person that I am today.

    'Hindi matutumbasan ng kahit anong salapi o yaman sa mundo ang mga iniwan niyang pangaral at masasayang alaala'

    As a mother, Sheryl will pass on the lessons she learned from her second mother to her own daughter.

    “I will forever treasure her words of wisdom she unselfishly imparted to me, my brothers and cousins, and all her grandchildren.

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    “Hindi matutumbasan ng kahit anong salapi o yaman sa mundo ang mga iniwan niyang pangaral at masasayang alaala sa amin.

    A tip for ‘second parents’

    For Filipino families, a “second mom” or “second dad” is normal. Most Filipino parents welcome the additional guidance a close relative would provide to their child.

    As Sheryl explained her relationship with her tita, “…she loves us just like the she had for her own child na maski hindi kami galing sa katawan niya, mga anak niya kami at nagpapasalamat siya sa Diyos na kami ay dumating sa buhay niya.”

    If you find yourself in a similar position of being a parental figure to a child who is not biologically yours such as in blended family setups, here is one tip you can remember:

    “Let the biological parent deal with discipline,” advises NPR.

    If the child you are parenting still has his or her biological parent, leave consequences and curfews to them. Research has shown that children are not ready for discipline from a stepparent.

    Reminders, unending encouragement, and a shoulder to cry on just like Susan Roces for Sheryl Cruz is a great example to follow.

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