Valeen Montenegro's Birthing Story: 'I Learned How to Surrender'

Valeen Montenegro-Manuel 

Actress/Comedian 

Wife to Riel and mom to 8-month-old Tiago

Valeen Montenegro-Manuel became a familiar face on Philippine television in the early 2000s. She began her career as one of ABS-CBN Star Magic’s new talents and went on to appear in various television shows. Her first acting role was in Pedro Penduko, where she played the younger version of Gloria Romero.

When she transferred to TV5, Valeen explored comedy and hosting through shows like Lokomoko, Lokomoko U, and P.O.5. She later cemented her reputation as a comedian after joining GMA’s Bubble Gang, the country’s longest-running comedy show. Her segment, Balitang Ina, alongside Chariz Solomon, became a fan favorite and eventually went viral on social media.

In January 2024, Valeen married Riel Manuel in an intimate wedding ceremony in Makati. Less than two years later, in November 2025, the couple welcomed their first child, Tiago Alonzo Manuel. 

Valeen was effortlessly radiant during her interview with Smart Parenting. She smiled throughout our conversation, as though looking back on her birthing journey filled her with gratitude and joy. The saying, “Motherhood looks good on her,” couldn’t be more fitting.

In this interview, Valeen shares her unexpected yet beautiful journey into motherhood—from trying to conceive and navigating pregnancy to giving birth and embracing the realities of the fourth trimester.

Smart Parenting [SP]: How’s the bagong ina?

Valeen Montenegro-Manuel [VMM]: Finally, may karapatan na akong sabihin, “Ako'y isang official Balitang Ina.” I've been super good, actually. May mga question marks pa rin, pero nagugulat ako that I've never been better. There are so many contradicting things. But to be honest, it just feels great. I love this version of me.

SP: Was your pregnancy planned, or were you more of a “go-with-the-flow" couple?

VMM: It's like a mix of both. When we got married in 2024, we were already trying (to conceive). At the same time, parang go with the flow lang din. Whatever happens, happens. We knew we’ll be really blessed if meron.

And then, lumipas na yung one year, and we realized, “Oh, it’s not that easy pala.” Tapos, medyo sabay-sabay na rin, my friends were getting married, having a baby, and getting pregnant. In our head, medyo nagkakaroon na ng pressure and questions. There’s also social media. Naisip ko, baka it’s time na medyo magpukpuk tayo.

But thankfully, we took it differently. Instead of getting stressed about society, we made sure to focus on our actions inwardly. We wanted to be healthy and be ready. I joined a marathon so that I was at the peak of my fitness and nutrition. Then, naturally, we were blessed with a baby.

SP: How did you find out you were pregnant?

VMM: I just finished my marathon, then when I tested, I was pregnant na pala. Walang any signs of pregnancy at first. But looking back, I think I already felt off when I was training. Siguro, I was like super zoned in lang na I had to finish the marathon. But come to think of it now na binabalikan ko, I was a little off.

SP: What was your pregnancy like?

VMM: At first, walang signs. I even ran a marathon. I was five weeks pregnant then. But after I found out, I felt sick. I guess it’s something mental, too. Just before the end of my first trimester, I was diagnosed with hyperemesis gravidarum. It’s severe morning sickness. Ang pagkakaintindi ko, my body was so used to being active and healthy, somehow, ni-reject ng body ko yung pregnancy hormones. Parang nagulat at in denial siya.

Nagpa-hospital ako when it was 24 hours na I can’t hold anything down. Kasi usually gutom ka diba, when you’re pregnant? Eto, wala talaga. I got scared that I wasn’t hitting my calories and nutrients, so I sought help.

SP: Did you get frustrated because you were physically active, but suddenly had to slow down?

VMM: It was a battle. In my head, I planned my pregnancy to be really active. That I’ll still be doing weights and running. Alam mo yung mga nakikita natin sa social media. But God had other plans. Ang lagi kong sinasabi, this pregnancy really humbled me kasi talagang wala. As in, I was just in bed. I couldn't move much. Maligo lang yung activity ko for the whole day, yun na yun. I was so tired.

Thankfully, it got better in the second and third trimester na. We have trips na naka-book na for our honeymoon, na-delay lang ng na-delay. Sabi namin, "When are we going to do this pa?" I've never traveled as much in my life as I did while I was pregnant.

The most exercise I’ve managed is walking, because we did a lot of it while traveling.

SP: You wore so many cute outfits that showed off your baby bump while traveling. Did you plan your maternity wardrobe?

VMM: I really loved my body and how it was growing. I kind of refused to buy maternity clothes din kasi parang sabi ko, "I'm only gonna be pregnant for, like, a year and hindi ko na siya masusuot ulit.” I have a few maternity clothes pero mahilig din naman ako sa oversized, so I chose comfort. Parang mas naaaliw din ako to dress myself when I was pregnant. I was so proud of that bump.

When I was traveling, parang ang saya din na nakikita yung other people to see you traveling while you're pregnant. Yung mga reaction nila parang like, "Oh." Ang saya lang. It's so positive. It was really nice to experience it firsthand. I got a lot of smiles, and they're happy for me.

SP: What preparations did you do? Did you do research or attend classes?

VMM: I did both. Especially sa mga nights na hindi ako makatulog. Iyun yung talagang super ChatGPT, Google, YouTube, everything. I also attended classes at The Parenting Emporium. I also asked a lot of my friends, talagang tinanong ko sila. Chariz and Mommy Karen were super helpful throughout my pregnancy.

SP: Was there a specific fear you had before giving birth? How did you prepare for it?

VMM: I think iyung talagang natakot ako, and iyung reason why hindi din ako makatulog before was the actual birth.

What’s the pain going to be like? Kaya ko ba? Am I thinking about it too much? Am I physically and mentally prepared for that kind of pain and all those things? Iniisip ko, kung kaya ng ibang tao, dapat kaya ko rin. Pero pano pag hindi ko kaya? Am I weak? Ang dami ko talagang questions.

But sana, I prepared more on breastfeeding. Like the actual latching, because in my opinion, I believe that's the hardest part. I say this because I am exclusively pumping. May milk ako pero nahirapan kaming mag-latch.

SP: How was your birthing experience? Did you experience the usual signs of labor and contractions? How far along were you when you gave birth?

VMM: I was induced. We reached my due date, 40 weeks and one day. And I wasn’t feeling any contractions. I wasn’t feeling anything. Sobrang tambay siya doon sa loob. I was already induced because my OB said my placenta was already full term. It’s getting old. She said we need to do something about it now, while the baby is not stressed pa.

But then we reached 15 hours of induced labor, and I was still only 1 cm dilated. At that point, I asked for an epidural. In my head, I was induced anyway. During the process of induction, I was having contractions every two minutes. Tapos hindi siya iyung normal na contractions na five minutes apart na. It's three minutes apart na lang. I wasn't getting that. Hindi siya iyung parang pasakit nang pasakit. It was like, pasakit, and then the next contraction, not so much. And then pasakit, pasakit, pasakit, then not so much. Pero every two minutes. So it was so grueling.

I was talking to my husband, sabi ko, "You know, I'm not gonna get the normal labor 'cause I was induced. So might as well get the epidural na lang para mas relaxed yung katawan ko, and I might dilate more."

But 24 hours in, I was only roughly 2.5 cm. The total was 28 hours of labor. We waited a little bit more para baka mag-dilate pa, but we only reached roughly 4 cm of dilation lang. That's when my doctor said, "Okay. Let's have a cesarean section."

That’s when I realized that most of our birthing plans are technically just an outline of how we want things to go. But our babies are masterminds. They're the directors of how they will come out.

We had high hopes na I would have a normal delivery kasi perfect iyung position niya. I was physically prepared for it naman din. But he had other plans, or my body also had other plans.

My birthing story would really be summarized as having to learn how to surrender everything. You know, just trust the process, trust the practitioners, your OB, and trust yourself. Kasi talagang hindi ko alam kung saan ko hinugot iyung strength na iyun.

I was trying to calm myself down, and I imagined what his voice is going to be like sa unang iyak niya. I couldn't calm down to sleep. I somehow really found strength from elsewhere. Strength I didn't know I had.

Totoo iyung when people ask, “Would you go through it all again?” Yeah, definitely. I would, and I wouldn't change any other thing. Kasi, he's healthy, he's a happy baby boy now. Alam mo iyun, parang every second, every minute, every hour, every day, it just keeps getting better.

SP: How was your first meeting with Tiago?

VMM: It wasn't quite how I imagined it in my head. Kasi ini-imagine ko, parang high pitch, parang ganun. Iyung iyak niya, ang baba. Sabi ko, "Oh!" Tapos totoo iyung parang, "Oh, sino iyun? Bagong boses iyun ah.

SP: How was your recovery? 

VMM: I’ve never had surgery before in my life, and this was my very first operation. Kaya wala akong basehan on how a recovery would be. But I would say that I healed well, it’s not as bad as how others experienced siguro. Thank God, because I healed very well, and a big part of that is because my husband is there, my family, and his family as well. Na-prioritize talaga iyung rest for me. Minsan, sarili ko lang iyung makulit talaga na I was walking around and doing everything.

SP: You mentioned earlier about your difficulty in latching. When did you discover that latching is hard? 

VMM: We were home for about one week. Parang napansin ko na every time na magugutom siya, he was getting stressed because I was also getting stressed. We tried to give him a bottle, and it was more peaceful for everyone. Also, I got to rest rin because it wasn’t just me that was capable of feeding him.

SP: Did your expectations and preparations match the reality of becoming a mom?

VMM: To be honest, parang hindi ko pala siya na-imagine. Hindi ko masyadong naisip iyung after. Siguro, I was zoned in to just giving birth and focusing on that. For me, as an overthinker, I think it went better. That road went better for me kasi at least I was more present, and I was winging it in a way na parang better siya for everyone din. Kasi wala masyadong expectations.

We went with the flow and adjusted on the go, which was better.

But there’s also the baby’s sleep. Before, I was so keen na kailangan, ma-sleep train si baby. The norm would be sleep training, and dapat by this age, they get to sleep on their own na. Hindi pala lahat ganun, and it's okay. It's really your choice. I accepted the fact na ako ang nag-he-help sa kanya to fall asleep. Their brains are still developing and still learning how to trust each other.

Until now, contact napping pa din kami. May times na malalapag ko siya, but there are times na ayaw niya talagang magpalapag, and there go all my plans!

Mas gusto ko din iyung pagiging wired ng brain ko na I'm here to nurture, I'm here for my son to feel more comfortable and feel safer. This is my role, so I'd rather just do that for him, kaysa iyung ako iyung nag-i-instill na "Dapat ganito ka, dapat ganyan."

And now, he just taught me how to slow down. I learned to accept that not everything will go as planned, and I am okay with the fact that ganito na muna ang life ko now.

SP: What’s the hardest part of the fourth trimester? 

VMM: It’s the crashing of the hormones, the ups and downs. I can’t really explain it. It's something that's really out of your control. Hindi mo talaga maintindihan ang sarili mo. It's a rollercoaster, and you just have to go through it. Ako nagulat ako nung I was still in the hospital. Nag-crash talaga iyung hormones ko when I gave birth. I was just trying to put words into how I was feeling. It suddenly hit me at nagulat ako. Ito pala iyung sinasabi nilang fourth trimester. Ito pala iyung sinasabi nilang crashing of hormones." I was feeling everything and nothing at the same time. 

SP: What helped you cope during the fourth trimester?

VMM: I am, like, the luckiest. Because I have my village, I have my tribe, I have my friends, and family. I have a cousin who also gave birth just six weeks apart from me. I get to go through this journey with her as a family, and it doesn’t even end there. Our sons will also grow up together. I get to check in on her and say, “Uy napagdaanan ko yan.” It’s a nice experience.

SP: If you could say something to your pregnant self about postpartum, what would it be?

VMM: Nakakaiyak naman. Technically, nasa postpartum pa ako talaga, kaya mabilis pa akong maiyak!

I would think na it's cliche, but it's cliche for something na, “Hoy, you don't have to worry so much because we're gonna do great and it's going to be amazing. It's like how you imagined it, but better. So you don't have to worry.

SP: What’s your message of encouragement to pregnant moms and new moms?

VMM: I would like to share something Chariz told me. "No one cooks the perfect egg the first time."

Nung sinabi niya iyun sa akin, I realized, "Oh my God. Yes, that's true." I don't have to be perfect. I don't have to be the best. But it takes time, it takes practice, it takes experience to have that perfect egg, and to enjoy it also.

That's how parenthood is. You don't have to be scared na hindi perfect. Kasi, it will come with practice. Just show up and do it, and you will be the perfect parent for them anyway.

My cousin also told me, you have to fill your cup every day. Just do something for yourself. Something that you want, something that you like. It's self-care. Don't forget yourself. And it's very important because you cannot show up for your loved ones if your cup is empty. So just do something for yourself every day, and you'll be surprised how you love yourself more, and it will resonate. You'll just emulate that love also outwardly.

Read here about Miriam Quiambao’s CS at 46 years old.