Former Hasht5 member and New dad Marlou Arizala, also known as Xander Ford, recently took to social media to share how he felt after most of the godparents he invited for his son's baptism didn't show up.
His son, Xeres Isaiah, with his girlfriend Gena Mago was baptized last May 3 in Cavite.
In a video uploaded today May 7, he explained what made him feel disappointed, "Nakakasama ng loob kasi umaasa kami na pupunta sila, pero okay lang naman kung hindi, pero sana eh inagahan nila na magsabi."
He said, he didn't want to name drop but he hinted that some of the godparents who didn't show up were influencers, "Kung pwede ko lang talaga ilagay dito kung sino man yung nagsabi na sana sila nalang yung ninong, sana nilagay ko nalang dito."
"Nakakasama ng loob kasi umaasa kami na pupunta sila, pero okay lang naman kung hindi, pero sana eh inagahan nila na magsabi."
He added, "Sobrang dami nila guys kaya sobrang na-depressed talaga ko nung araw na yun kasi siyempre, ineexpect nung mga nag-sponsor sa amin na pupunta yung mga magni-ninong at magni-ninang sa amin na influencer."
More than not showing up, what hurt him the most was when he had to ask his relatives to proxy for those who were absent during the pre-baptism seminar, "Ang sakit sa puso," he stressed.
Nevertheless, he assured those who weren't able to attend that he understands their situation.
READ ALSO: Pagpili Ng Ninong At Ninang: 5 Magagandang Katangian Na Dapat Mong Hanapin
Parents can relate with Xander Ford's hurt feelings
Over at the Smart Parenting Village, parents weigh in on the issue, and some of them validated the feelings of the new dad.
An anonymous mom shared, "I would like to share my story din, nakikita ko kase na ang daming insensitive na tao at tinawanan at na bash pa nga si Marlou."
"Valid ang feeling mo if you feel disappointed or malungkot dahil hindi sila pumunta."
She then shared about her child's baptism in 2021, and how she still gets annoyed when she remembers how her closest friends didn't attend the milestone event after countless reminders.
"Although I won't agree na doon mo lang mame-measure ang halaga sayo ng tao, but valid ang feeling mo if you feel disappointed or malungkot dahil hindi sila pumunta. It could've been better kahit nakikain nalang kasi reserved na sila and bayad na din, we took effort para sa kanila and thinking na free na nga lang yun, and one ride lang din sa city that won't take more than 10-20 minutes," she explained."
What made her feel insulted was the fact that her friends cancelled on the day itself, Kasi pinaasa nila ako na "baka makapunta" so kahit a day before sana nagsabi na sila para ma invite ko nalang yung iba," the mom added.
READ ALSO: 'Hindi Ako Financer': Ninang's Post on Role of Godparents Goes Viral
How to avoid having no-show guests
Meanwhile, moms and dads in the comment section pitched in their advice to help keep others from experiencing the same. These also apply when organizing other events, such as birthdays, etc.
1. RSVP is a must
One mom shared that during her daughter's birthday, she set a deadline for her guests to RSVP two weeks before the event. "If not confirmed, inoffer na namin sa iba yung slots nila."
She also suggested creating a Facebook event page where they can provide more information for the guests, like last-minute cancellation and additional seats, "para malinaw sa lahat at walang samaan ng loob."
2. Treasure the people who show up
A mom pointed out that one way to know who your true friends are is when they make an effort to come to your event, "Unless valid talaga yung reason nila bakit hindi pupunta."
She stressed, "If you really matter to them, a week before the event, mag-iinform sila sa'yo."
3. Do what you want others to do unto you
If you are invited to an important event especially one where you will play a role like a godparent, make sure that you will politely respond to the host. One mom said, "Pag ako ininvite, I say no pag hindi talaga kaya. Pero when I say yes, pupunta talaga ako kasi alam ko yung value na ininvite tayo sa isang event. Ibig sabihin they treasure us, and they want to celebrate a special occassion with us."
4. Celebrate differently
Some moms share that instead of holding big parties and inviting guests, they prefer spending these occassions intimately. One mom said, "Hindi na ako uulit. Mag-out of town nalang kami siguro, mas masaya pa ako."
Another one explained why she chooses to go on a vacation trip with her immediate family instead of a huge celebration, "Tipid pa. Mas naaalala pa ng bata ang bonding ng pamilya kaysa maalala mo taun-taon ang sama ng loob na dulot ng di nila pagdalo."
5. Choose "quality over quantity" when inviting guests
A mom puts it firmly, "Super selected lang lagi kong iniinvite. Hindi talaga mutual ang efforts and feelings natin sa ibang "friends" na tinuturing natin."
She added, "Di bale nang konti, basta may peace of mind."
Join the conversation here.
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