Screen time is probably one of the most discussed topics in the 21st century. It can be a blessing as we become more connected with our loved ones but, for many families, it can be a burden and challenge to keep a healthy amount of screen time exposure for their children.
For Episode 10 of Poprica, Smart Parenting Editor-At-Large Rica Peralejo-Bonifacio discusses the screen time dynamics in their family and shared valuable tips that works well for her kids.
Rica has two kids, Philip, 8, and Manu, 3, with husband Joseph. “I think that we could actually achieve a healthy balance between screen time and non-screen time activities,” she says optimistically but emphasizes on the crucial role of parents in keeping the children’s screen time in constant check.
5 Sensible Screen Time Rules For Kids
1. Establish limits.
Every parent probably subscribes to this rule but the difficult part is how to do it. Rica believes in balancing her kids’ time between their gadgets, physical activities and, yes, boredom.
“Boredom is just as good for our children,” she says. “Yan ang sinasabi ng mga developmental experts. They say, it's not only good for kids but even for us-- to find ourselves bored,” she adds.
On limiting screen time: 'Some will even cry and make wala. That is all part of the package… hahayaan ko lang sila.'
Rica says that parents should not be afraid of establishing screen time limits even if their children would whine and complain.
It’s easy for many parents to give in once the whining starts but, for Rica, she’s learned to be tougher about the issue through years.
“Ang solution dun ay tiisan na lang,” she points out, adding that she has learned not to give in even if it means relentless pleas for more screen time. “Some will even cry and make wala. That is all part of the package… hahayaan ko lang sila,” she explains. “Pag nagrereklamo sila, [tell yourself] ‘hindi ako ma-tri-trigger’.”
'Tandaan, the limits are there to protect, they are not there to give them a hard life.'
While it may be difficult not to give in, she says, parents will reap the rewards later on. “This is good for them because, the truth is, you have (already) given them some time and that you are only establishing limits,” she points out.
“Tandaan, the limits are there to protect, they are not there to give them a hard life.”
2. Consume together.
Rica admits that she is not a fan of video games but her husband and kids are. To keep tabs on their playtime, Rica says her husband would play videos with Philip and Manu.
All cooped up in one, room, Rica would hear her boys scream and make comments while playing. “It's such an activity for father and son and I find comfort in that knowing that my kids have not lost the ability to relate with a human being over their passive consumption with their gadget or their device,” she says.
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While Rica says it is not all the time that Joseph gets to play with the kids, still she appreciates the fact that there is a parent who is able to ‘join the world of their kids.’
“He makes them feel na Minecraft or Roblox is not only Philip's world or Manu's world. It's something that he, as a father, is involved in as well.
3. Don’t just consume but create.
‘Not all digital activities are equal in reality,’ Rica declares. “Some are really designed for just consuming. Some require response but not a very educational response so, di ba, parang magkakaiba yung levels niyan.
And then there are others that ask you to create,” she says. For their son Philip, she and Joseph allowed him to explore animating using Legos through a video app.
“It's hard to beat the convenience that a gadget can offer. But what we can do instead is choose. Choose well,” she advises.
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4. Do not relinquish parental control.
For every screen time tug-of-war between children and their parents, the heart of the issue is always control, Rica observes.
It’s the parents role to guide and establish limits to prepare their children for an environment where they can control their emotions and know that there are areas in life that need limits.
“It’s no different when it comes to their screen time, gadget time, or device use,” she argues.
Screen time is part of kids' lives, which is why it's important to choose well.
Control is not just learning to say ‘no,’ but also being mindful of the Apps that we allow our children to use. “It's so dangerous out there. I mean we all know it,” she says, referring to social media apps where sensitive content still manages to show up in one’s feed.
She says, it’s important to choose apps that have tight parental controls designed to protect children. Rica and Joseph are able to regulate the viewing options of their children in YouTube and Netflix, because it allows them to choose shows that are appropriate for their kids’ age.
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5. Kids need movement.
“I think many of us love the convenience of having something as small and as powerful as a tablet or a smartphone but sometimes what we fail to see is that children are supposed to move,” says Rica.
Parents’ priority should still be to address the need for children to keep moving. She argues that it is not always the children’s fault if they are sedentary because of their gadgets. Parents who tend to give in to their children’s request for more screen time for ‘peace of mind’ or convenience may be the ones responsible.
“Isipin natin, ano ba talaga yung mas gusto ng bata kung tatanungin natin sila? Gusto ba talaga nila na passive na lang sila at nanonood the whole time?” she reflects.
More often than not, kids will want to play alone or with their friends, and get messy and dirty while discovering new fun things in the process. “The human connection is essential to all of us. (Since) you are their parent, you have the control to make that happen,” she says.
As Rica acknowledges, screen time offers entertainment and everyone needs some form of entertainment in life. “Hindi natin puwedeng tanggalin 'yan. Sometimes, we need to just sit back, relax, and watch a movie,” she says.
However, as tempting as it is to allow our children to enjoy their gadgets, there simply has to be a limit and as parents, we have the power to do this for their own good.
“Embrace that and say to yourself that 'God has given me this authority in our family's life so I can make it sure that we get to live the best of it,’” she concludes.
WATCH THE POPRICA EPISODE HERE:
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