Unplugged Parenting: 10 Days Without My Phone And The Surprising Revelations

Are you also like me, who, even when I tell my child, "Just let me finish my work and I will play with you," still couldn't help but check your phone every moment possible?

Perhaps when your child becomes engrossed with their drawing or when an old toy suddenly becomes interesting during playtime. Every time my phone vibrates, or even if it doesn't, I have that urge to check so that I won't miss out on a group chat or because I need to do something before I forget, like ordering food or paying bills.

Sometimes I think I have a mobile phone addiction. According to my phone's data, I use it for up to 6 to 8 hours a day. If you ask my 3-year-old daughter what I love to do that she hates the most, it's "cellphone-ing." I know that I'm not alone because even celebrity moms who I look up too like Bianca Gonzales and Iya Villania confessed that they want to lessen their time spent on their phones, too.

No, I didn't go to a remote island for 10 days to find myself. One day, my trusty and beloved Samsung Note 20 5G just decided to take a break for me. It went into a restart loop, and I couldn't use it unless I put it in the fridge to cool down. Seriously. I spent hours in a queue at the Service Center to get a diagnosis, only to find out that it would cost me P17,000 to get it fixed. I would normally say, "Take my money!" because that's my beloved phone, but no, it's just too much.

5 realizations after being an unplugged parent for 10 days

So, I spent a total of 10 days without a phone until I bought my sister's preloved phone because it almost drove me crazy. At first, it was okay. A break is good. Then it felt like torture. Along the way, I learned these 7 things while being an unplugged parent.

1. As I take a break from my phone, my child took a screen break too.

Before my phone gave up on me, my daughter used to play games whenever I was working. We don't have a helper at home, so when push comes to shove, my phone becomes our babysitter. I would let her play some teacher-approved games, with my supervision, of course. So when my phone went AWOL, both of us didn't have a choice but to play with her toys. In those 10 days of being phoneless, I became the most present parent in the world, and it made her happy. Our conversations were deeper, our stories more imaginative, all because we were fully engrossed in our play without distractions.

READ ALSO: Screen Time Before 18 Months Old Can Lead To Behavioral Problems In Childhood

2. We found new hobbies.

Instead of using my phone to play games, we would have our screen time together. We marathoned Disney Plus movies, and we finished the Toy Story saga, even watching the short films. All while snuggled on the sofa and discussing the film as it happened.

I also got reacquainted with my child's drawing skills, heard her say new words that have been added to her vocabulary, and more importantly, I looked her in the eye more when we talked.

3. I got more sleep.

When I'm breastfeeding my daughter, that's the best time to do some doomscrolling because what else can I do? So when I didn't have anything to doom scroll for 10 days, I slept with my child. Studies show that prolonged screen time in adults can impede sleep. So I realized that I should stop blaming my kid for causing me to lack sleep. It's really my screen time habits, not being a parent.

After work hours and without access to my laptop, I was either playing with my child, talking to my husband, cleaning the house, or sleeping. Never have I felt so energized and well-rested as during those 10 days.

Not to mention that since I didn't have a phone, I didn't have an alarm clock to wake me up or snooze!

READ ALSO: Moms Ang Malimit Na Nakararanas Ng Revenge Bedtime Procrastination

4. I said hello to paper bills and coins again.

Since the pandemic and online payments became a thing, I never withdraw cash. That's why when I couldn't use my phone to pay for our meal deliveries and everything, I resorted to cash payment. Believe it or not, it was my first time holding the new 1000-peso polymer bill.

Going offline meant getting in touch with reality, and it was a good exercise to explore other means to pay rather than just scanning QR codes and saving screenshots. I realized how powerful one-time pins or OTPs are. Real talk: You can almost not live without them! Don't get me wrong, online payments are efficient and amazing, but it's also nice to be reminded once in a while of the other options available.

Aside from cash, I also touched a pen and notebook. I used to jot down my ideas on my phone whenever they came to me. One night, my husband and daughter were already asleep, and I had a eureka moment about a story angle. I could've just stashed my phone and typed it, but since I didn't have one, I grabbed a pen and a dusty notebook from my desk, went somewhere with light, and started writing. It felt amazing.

I also experienced writing down my family members' phone numbers on a small sheet of paper because I have to text them using someone else's phone.

5. I was able to focus on offline things, like learning how to drive.

Because I didn't have anything to distract me except when I was using my laptop, I got bored enough to finally push myself to start my driving practice. Without notifications to bug me or unread messages to reply to, I didn't have a choice but to give my full focus to relearning how to drive, and I'm happy that I did.

READ ALSO: This Mom Learned To Drive And Was Reminded: Life Doesn't End When You Become A Mom

The sad part of being phoneless

Although it seems fun and cool to reflect about life without your device, there are also a few cons of not having a phone to use. A lot. Highlighting these two that I didn't like the most.

1. You can't take photos

One morning, my daughter woke up from her sleep, sat down, placed her head on the headboard, and decided to sleep again. If I had my phone with me, I would've taken her photo and immortalized that rare, funny moment. I also wasn't able to buy a gift from Lazada, make an Instagram reel for my husband for Father's Day, but I think the broken phone could be just an excuse. 

2. You will miss out, but it's okay

Nevertheless, having no phone also relieved the pressure of having to upload an Instagram story about my day, and making the world think that I'm perfectly okay.

I was also avoided certain triggers or discussions that could've caused me stress. Now, more than ever, I became more deliberate and mindful of what I'll post. 

The bottomline

I wouldn't wish for anyone to be unable to use their phone for 10 days, but if you could try even just a few hours or a day, you would already see the difference it can make in your life.

This is just a reminder that you are not required to be updated with the lives of other people through social media. Time spent off your phone is not time wasted. However, you are encouraged to be fully present in your child's life. Time spent with them will forever be cherished. 

Again, you don't have to lose your phone to try this too. If you are able to see your child's eyes more than you see your screen, then you are off to a good start. This one you can try right now: stop all screen usage for 30 minutes to an hour before you go to sleep. 

Don't let your phone distract you from being a present parent. Read 6 tips here.