This Viral Video Reminds Us That What Working Mothers Need Is Support And Understanding, Not A Side-Eye

Smart Parenting's PerSPective is our editorial team's take on the parenting and family issues today's Filipino families are facing. Through these opinion pieces, we as the country's leading parenting media brand hope to spark conversations and help fellow parents achieve our shared goal: to raise happy, healthy families.

It's back-to-school season, and as students look forward to seeing their classmates and teachers again, some parents are bracing for a year-long commitment to preparing their kids' daily baon, helping them with their homework, and juggling everything with their jobs. Yes, we see you.

Amidst these preparations, a viral video is stirring emotions, especially among parents.

'Wala si Mama' video ad is making us cry—again

The video is an old advertisement titled "Wala si Mama" by the formula milk brand Lactum 3+. The video was originally intended for Mother's Day in 2019 but has resurfaced in social media platforms like Facebook and TikTok with a poignant edit: the uploader added the text "Wala si mama" with a crying emoji and the words "back to school 2023," making the video more relatable and timely. It's not just poking our mom guilt buttons; it's invoking nostalgia.

If you haven't seen it, the video follows the journey of a young boy preparing to go to school, without mom or dad to assist him.

Upon arriving at school, a fellow student's mom noticed that the boy's buttons are mismatched and asks, "Asan ba ang nanay mo?"

During a school performance, the boy is once again alone, which was a good chance for his classmate's mom to ask, "Wala ka bang nanay?"

Still, the boy looked confident and unbothered. In the next scene, it's revealed that his mother, a nurse, has already prepared everything for him before leaving for work. Although she wanted to attend his school performance, she had to leave due to a work emergency.

After the boy's performance, his mom arrives, revealing the truth.

I don't know how many mothers cried in this part, but I sure did when the boy said, "Sa mata nila, nagkulang ka. Pero sa mata ko, panalong panalo ka." 

READ ALSO: Why This Teacher-Mama Is Unbothered With Comments Like 'Paano Trabaho Mo Kung Lagi Mo Dala Anak Mo?'

Heartwarming video about working moms

This video hits differently for new parents like me who are now sending our kids to school. What makes it even more heartwarming is realizing that we were once the little boy, reminding us of how our mothers managed to raise us while working 9 to 5. 

My mother was, and still is, a government employee. She would wake up ahead of everyone to cook breakfast at 4 AM. The one who would prepare a pail of lukewarm water just so that the cold tap water won't bother me when we bathe at 5 AM. The one who would come home tired from work but still have the energy to help us with our assignments. The one who would go to great lengths to get us that Linggo ng Wika costume, or that 1/4 size colored index cards.

When I attempted to prepare a bento baon for my four-year-old daughter's one-month summer playschool, I couldn't imagine I'd be doing it for 13 more years!

As I watched the video, I couldn't help but cry not for myself, but for my mom, wishing life had been easier for her.

I wish she had the option to work from home like me and spend more time with me and my sisters. I wish my classmates' mom didn't think of her as an absent parent just because she missed some of my school activities. I wish our neighbors didn't give her those judgmental looks and side-eyes when she left home in her office uniform.

READ ALSO: To You Who Had To Put Your Kids First Before Your Career, This SAHM Reminds, 'Hindi Lahat Ng Achievement Nasa Papel'

What working parents need

As the parents of a new generation, we can do something to change this: Be kind.

It's easier said than done, but we can start by normalizing that working moms and stay-at-home moms are doing their best. We've said it a lot of times, there is no one-size-fits-all way to parent, and sometimes, circumstances dictate whether parents work or stay home. Be kind.

Normalize that it takes a village to raise a child. If the mother isn't present, then ask, "Where's the father?" What working mothers need from the world is not a condescending gaze. They would appreciate access to childcare services. They would benefit from more flexible work arrangements. They would love equal work opportunities. Even a simple compliment like "You are doing a great job," or "I see that you are trying" would mean the world to them.

The video reminds us that although we have to make sacrifices, it doesn't make us less of a parent if we keep trying. Whether working or staying-at-home, parenting is hard. The only resolution rests in knowing that when we try our best to become good parents, whether we fail or we succeed, the world will be a bit kinder to us.

We're in the era of open letters, and if you are a working mom and this reaches you, let us tell you this: from the moment your alarm rings in the morning, to the moment you set it again at night, we see you, and we understand.

And as the young boy in the video said, "Sa mata nila, nagkulang ka. Pero sa mata ko, panalong panalo ka." 

Judy Santiago Aladin is the section editor of Smart Parenting. She has a four-year-old daughter, who loves to draw whenever her mom is working on her laptop.